Author Green_Eren Posted August 8, 2017 Author Posted August 8, 2017 Well I made the call... no answer. No call back lol It sucks but atleast I got my answer, crazy how someone can act so affectionate and disappear like that. I must sound naive, but its just that this has never happened to me before. While I do think making the call was a mistake, I think the result would have been the same if I never did. Either way I would have never spoken to her or seen her again. Oh well haha 1
Versacehottie Posted August 8, 2017 Posted August 8, 2017 OP, you barely know this girl. I understand you had a fun night with her, but what you truly know about her is minimal. She might be the type who loves attention and sexual validation, and has more than one guy on the go, without wanting anything more. She might be the type to say she'd never take her ex back, and then the moment he comes around cap in hand, she's putty in his hands. People swear all the time they would never return to an ex, and then what do you know? It happens. The point is that her actions are what you need to pay attention to. You have tried and failed twice to connect with her. She's flaky and too much work. Imagine dating a girl like this? You'd likely be the one to get all ready to go and on the way to meet her when she texts you with a flimsy "soooo sorry, but can we do this another time?" Or to try to arrange a date to see each other but get no reply (oh wait...that's already happened!) She doesn't even have enough respect or maturity to respond to you. That says it all. Yes, it would look desperate if you reach out again. don't accept the FB request. I think it's likely part of a plan to try to make her ex jealous. Why be "friends" or potentially flirt with you in public i.e. on FB? Um, yeah to make someone else jealous or look like she is moving on to someone, collecting potential boyfriends. If she won't talk to you privately, i.e. respond to texts or phone calls, don't follow her. She is probably also trying to keep you on the back burner. I have to say it is so funny when guys don't get that what they would or wouldn't do isn't at all what girls would or wouldn't do. Lots of my friends creep on guys pages and show me this guy or that guy. It's a girl thing. It doesn't necessarily mean much; it's more of validation and curiosity. It can turn the tide toward them liking you back if they start to see something intriguing BUT she is already not responding to invites & phone call that than is a much stronger indicator of where you are now--nowhere with her. Sorry. BTW, girls put together whole campaigns of what they post on social media to get a reaction from the guy they DO like so I'm thinking most likely this was part of a campaign or she's "collector" to make herself look relevant. You already contacted her but I was going to say don't. I still say don't accept friend request BECAUSE it will kill her and she will likely contact you because you are ignoring her. Trust me, she is one of those. Or if you did friend her, unfriend her. If she can't be bothered to respond to you in real life and nothing much going on with you, there is no reason to be friends with her. This is much more likely to get a reaction from her. BTW, count this as a blessing in disguise: who wants a long distance gf when you are in college. She already sounds like a handful and college is supposed to be fun. Bump back into her 4 years from now perhaps--when she has grown up a bit and has all her stuff out of her system. Good luck
Yumira Posted September 25, 2017 Posted September 25, 2017 Hi. That's probably not what you want to hear but if she didnt reply to your last two texts she is probably just not that interested. If it helps you: I had the same problem a while ago and it did work out in the end. That guy just had to check with other people if our plans were okay and didn't think about telling me that. Maybe she has to talk to her parents first or something? But generally I would say it isn't a good sign, especially if she didn't answer to your other text either. Anything new yet?
MidwestUSA Posted September 25, 2017 Posted September 25, 2017 (edited) Wrong thread. Sorry. Edited September 25, 2017 by MidwestUSA
Mike B. Posted September 26, 2017 Posted September 26, 2017 It is worth stating again and again that when a woman is into you, there just are not mixed signals. They are just not really there. There will be the occasional person that gives you a mixed signal story out there that worked out but this is definitely the exception. I am sure I have one or two somewhere if I think long enough. You will be forever confused and misguided if you try to apply exceptions to your dating situations. You really have to operate by a framework to build a thick skin. When women are really into you, they let you do a lot of skating from A to Z. They don't just go putting up speed bumps every where. Your best bet here is to stop chasing. 1
Mjm1014 Posted September 26, 2017 Posted September 26, 2017 Yep, sounds like some mixed signals for sure. A couple points/questions though. 1. Was there alcohol in the mix that led up to sex? If so, that could be an issue-maybe she wasn’t as interested as she thought she was at the time. 2. Sounds like you hardly know her..do you know for certain she’s single? Try to find this out via Facebook. 3. Just because she added you on Facebook doesn’t mean she looked you up..actually if she added your number in her phone and her phone is linked to FB your page most likely showed up as “someone she may know”..trust me half of my old tinder contacts pop up and I have no mutual connections with any of them. 4. If she’s in college-long distance might not really appeal to her even if she likes you. Above are just a couple things to think about..honestly she sounds like a headache..I can’t stand when people ignore messages, especially someone I’m into. If they do, I usually just forget about them because if they were truly interested they would respond and it’s just rude-especially if it’s someone you had sex and were intimate with recently. Your best course of action is to drop off the radar for awhile which will make her wonder. Let a week or so go by, and if you still feel the need, give her a call. Call once/leave a message, and if she doesn’t CALL you back forget her. Regardless never text her again until she either texts you back or returns your next call or you will look like a creep in her eyes. If she doesn’t return your call, you need to be done with her. Lastly, maybe she’s putting a guard up because of the distance. Had that happen to me before. Met an awesome girl but ended up having to move right after..couldn’t get in contact with her for awhile and it turned out she listened to her friends which were discouraged her from wanting anything to do with me since I moved. She basically told me this about 6 months later. All I’m saying is maybe she really does like you, but she’s putting up walls on purpose so she doesn’t get hurt..who knows. Good luck. Call her up in a week and re-evaluate.
EthanSPK Posted September 26, 2017 Posted September 26, 2017 It is worth stating again and again that when a woman is into you, there just are not mixed signals. They are just not really there. Actually that's debatable. I was into a girl who was highly interested in me, but most of the time she was talking about how sad she was because of her recently failed relationship, while sending signals of interest. At the end I just didn't know how to handle it and ghosted her, only to find out much later that she was in love with me. People is complicated, especially if emotional distress is present.
Mike B. Posted September 26, 2017 Posted September 26, 2017 (edited) Actually that's debatable. I was into a girl who was highly interested in me, but most of the time she was talking about how sad she was because of her recently failed relationship, while sending signals of interest. At the end I just didn't know how to handle it and ghosted her, only to find out much later that she was in love with me. People is complicated, especially if emotional distress is present. Like I said above in that same post, every one will always have a story of exception. You can't say anything in this life without someone having a story demonstrating an exception to the rule. I advise to follow the rule rather than the exception. Focusing on the exception will drive you nuts. You shouldn't walk through mine fields but I am sure some folks have and didn't get a limb blown off. Edited September 26, 2017 by Mike B.
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