Jobber22 Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 Been dating a older single mom for a couple of months but known her for over a year. Usually text a few times a day. Recently we had sex and I spent the night with her for the first time. She has not dated in around 4 years and explained I was the first to sleep with her in this period of time. She has been distant for about 2 weeks since but I have acted normal as usual. We see eachother every day at work and I notice her glances but we usually do not conversate. She brought my lunch 3 times last week but still seems distant going days without text or not much of a reply. She initiates the conversations. Recently she brought up a movie that I had asked her to awhile back but had not came out. I asked her to go see it and she said yes but 2 days later she had too much to do but offered an alternate day. This is tomorrow but I feel she is going to flake again. Any advice?
carhill Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 Known her a year. Dating a few months. Sex recently. Single mother. Met or seen pictures of her kid(s)? Met or seen pictures of her kid(s) with their father? Been to her domicile, like perhaps she fixed a nice dinner for you? How did that go? Was the sexual experience at your place or her place? Is she responsive to your initiation of communication? Think back to initially after you had sexual relations. When you contacted her, even in person directly after the experience, did she present as positive and 'into you'? What's your goal here? Dating? Girlfriend? Live together? Married? What? Do you work together?
Author Jobber22 Posted August 5, 2017 Author Posted August 5, 2017 Known her a year. Dating a few months. Sex recently. Single mother. Met or seen pictures of her kid(s)? Met or seen pictures of her kid(s) with their father? Been to her domicile, like perhaps she fixed a nice dinner for you? How did that go? Was the sexual experience at your place or her place? Is she responsive to your initiation of communication? Think back to initially after you had sexual relations. When you contacted her, even in person directly after the experience, did she present as positive and 'into you'? What's your goal here? Dating? Girlfriend? Live together? Married? What? Do you work together? I have had dinner with her and her kids, no pics of father in the house. She has made me dinner several times at her house followed by kissing and cuddling on the couch. She's very hot and cold with texting, may be text right back or hours
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 I have had dinner with her and her kids, no pics of father in the house. She has made me dinner several times at her house followed by kissing and cuddling on the couch. She's very hot and cold with texting, may be text right back or hours She's just not sure how she's feeling about all of this. Perhaps even with dating in general. It's not easy to balance it all....full time job, single parenting, a new relationship. 1
minou23 Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 Honestly how was the sex? I know sometimes the first time in a long time for some people is not always great. Happened to me once, but then the second time and every time after was amazing. Sex is just awkward sometimes. Or maybe she felt she moved too fast? Some people sleep with others right away and some wait many months. She could be feeling dumb for sleeping with you if she felt it was too fast. Or maybe she's worried you're not serious enough. That you only want a FWB situation. Maybe she's worried about having feelings for you and you breaking her heart then it's awkward at work. Or she's afraid other people at work will know and she prefers to keep her personal life to herself. Maybe she's just afraid in general to get into another relationship given her past and because she has kids. I really think you need to be as patient as possible to not jump to conclusions and wait till you guys can discuss it in person. If you feel she's distancing herself she probably is but there could be a good reason and it might not have to do with you personally. If you guys go to the movies gently bring it up on the way home or something. If she flakes then call her or text and tell her what's on your mind. At that point you don't have much to lose.
preraph Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 The one thing that is guaranteed that you can accept as fact is that a single mom is overwhelmingly busy so if she says she's busy, don't question that. 1
Author Jobber22 Posted August 5, 2017 Author Posted August 5, 2017 The one thing that is guaranteed that you can accept as fact is that a single mom is overwhelmingly busy so if she says she's busy, don't question that. No doubt, I'm also a single father. She just confirmed date tomorrow so we will see how it goes. 1
Ami1uwant Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 What complicates this is the fact you two work together. This isnt something to play with. She may not have expected to meet/date someone from work, now that sex happened she may be distant unsure how to handle this. Risk a relationship and then a break up vs ending it now early on where there will likely not be as much "damage"
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