ohso Posted August 4, 2017 Posted August 4, 2017 I reconciled with my ex I've been dating for many years. We've been broken up for a long time. We had separate places we lived in, but shared them too. His parents bought us some things for our places, both his and my. After we broke up his parents demanded I get back all things they bought us and things that were in my place, that mostly only I used. Ridiculous things I had to return, like pillows and towels. I just can't believe why would they do this, they're not poor. I suddenly ended up having nothing and had to buy things in a hurry. Now since I'm back together with my ex, his parents wants to have dinner with us at their place. I was so embarrassed for having to return things that grew close to me and were kind of intimate, that I feel uncomfortable to see them and be in their house. What do you think about their demands and about this whole situations, how should I handle it? Should I just go there like nothing happened and not even mention it to my bf? He know about it, he asked me to return things since they asked him to do it.
JHandy Posted August 4, 2017 Posted August 4, 2017 Rebuilding your relationship is job one. Do what's best for you and your partner. The burden is on them to apologize. If they don't, just forgive and forget. The past is a messy swamp to wade in. But I would keep an eye on the parents. Focus on your partner. Let your partner know they are not to interfere anymore. When it becomes evident that you both want to make a go at it, keep only one apartment. 2
BaileyB Posted August 4, 2017 Posted August 4, 2017 What they did is ridiculous. But, you knew this about them when you decided to reconcile. So knowing that, you have to accept that this is just the kind of people they are and attempt to form some kind of relationship with them, given that you are dating their son. I would advise you however, not to get too attached to anything they give you in the future. 1
reboot Posted August 4, 2017 Posted August 4, 2017 Your mistake was ever giving the stuff back in the first place. Gifts are gifts. 1
somanymistakes Posted August 4, 2017 Posted August 4, 2017 I'd go over once and give them a chance to apologise. If they say nothing and pretend it never happened, I'd suggest then going home and writing them a polite note explaining that you felt very hurt when they acted like that towards you in the past. Send it, and then ignore them completely until and unless they respond. You're not dating THEM, after all, you can manage to ignore each other.
usa1ah Posted August 4, 2017 Posted August 4, 2017 Really surprised you got back with him after that actually. Be civil but distant. Never let them buy you anything again. 5
MidwestUSA Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 If someone asked me to return bath towels, I'd get myself a Sharpie, and take the time to write 'face' on one end, and 'a$$' on the other. On every damned one of them. :laugh: 3
mikeylo Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 Really surprised you got back with him after that actually. Be civil but distant. Never let them buy you anything again. From now on , YOU be the one to give them gifts and in case you break up , see how it goes if you ask them back. Caution : give only as much as you think it wouldn't bother you. Because you wouldn't get anything back
jenkins95 Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 (edited) (((ohso))) Great that you are back with your man again! These situations can be awkward. A friend of my wife's split up with her husband after about one year of marriage and her father was very outspoken about her H. He said he'd never liked him, thought he was a conceited b*stard, always knew she could do so much better and was delighted that it was over. I don't think his attitude helped her at all after the breakup, but I often think, with a wicked smile , how bloody awkward it must have been six months later... when they reconciled! Omg, I mean, he couldn't take those words back then! He should have kept his thoughts more to himself, but as far as I know they are still happily married and it's probably just as well that they don't live very close to the in-laws! I imagine that when they do get together, he has to eat a certain amount of humble pie! In this case, what they did seems ridiculously petty, but at least they didn't insult you verbally and hopefully this is something you can all move past quickly and put behind you. Actually they probably feel pretty bad and embarrassed about it now. The ideal thing would be if they offered you a genuine and pleasant, but not over the top, apology to clear the air and allow you all to move past it and make a fresh start. Great if they give you all your stuff back too Good luck ohso! Please let us know how you get on! Edited August 5, 2017 by jenkins95
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