smee707 Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 Hi I was dating this girl (about 7 dates in total). The first 6 dates went really well. We had so much in common and spent most the time laughing together. We had slept together, but only when drunk. Then we met last week and things were awkward. It was like we were only friends. I messaged her afterwards and she said it was weird, neither of us knew what had happened. I've been thinking a lot about it and I know I haven't been 100% committed to it. I've been busy with work ect. But when she messaged the other day, she said she doesnt think the chemistry is there, or that I really am that into her. The truth is, not talking for the last week has made me realise that I am really into her. And would love to give it another go. Can i win her back? How would I go about telling her that I want to see her again, because i know she doesnt think it will be better. But i would like to give it another go. Thanks
d0nnivain Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 Schedule another date & ask her to give you a chance to prove that her perception is wrong. You can also try sending a small bouquet of flowers. In the future don't try to discuss emotional stuff like the state of your relationship via messenger. Save that for in person conversations.
amazonrambo Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 In the future don't try to discuss emotional stuff like the state of your relationship via messenger. Save that for in person conversations. I wouldn't even mention anything emotional, as it displays feminine energy. Let her bring this sort of thing up and keep having fun on dates for now. 1
d0nnivain Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 I wouldn't even mention anything emotional, as it displays feminine energy. Let her bring this sort of thing up and keep having fun on dates for now. He said he messengered her after the date to talk about the awkwardness. My point wasn't about the energy or vibe just that having any discussion at all about the relationship over text is a bad plan.
TheBathWater Posted August 1, 2017 Posted August 1, 2017 If she doesn't think the chemistry is there, it's pretty much a done deal. Once a woman is turned off, especially early in the dating stages, it's hard to keep things going. I think your best bet would be to communicate to her that that's okay, that you are interested in her, and if she changes her mind at some point to get in touch with you. Then let her go completely. No texting, messaging, etc... If she's on your social media, you can keep her there, but don't 'like' her posts or signal any kind of contact with her. Then, if and when she reaches out to you, you'll know that she's been thinking about you and that there's another shot. At that point, say what's up back, invite her out for drinks, and have a fun night that leads to hooking up. Keep it simple. Good luck.
GemmaUK Posted August 1, 2017 Posted August 1, 2017 You admit you weren't 100% there due to being busy. She said she didn't think the chemistry was there but also that she didn't think you were really into her. She has given you a huge indicator here for why she doesn't think the chemistry is there. Sounds like you've had time to think and perhaps didn't treat her as well as you could have done. Speak to her on the phone (if she won't meet you for a chat) and tell her what you told us. At this point you have nothing to lose. But, right from that conversation you need to buck up your ideas. Change your behaviour and treat her properly. If you cannot do that then let her go so she can find a good man who will treat her right.
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