Ohgotch Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 11 days is nothing if he's really into you. And I think he wanted to keep you as a back burner by keep liking your IG. Please move on. He was cheated imao.
ExpatInItaly Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 What would you say if you texted him though, OP? He was a jerk. I would have nothing more to do with this guy, and I don't buy for a moment that he just randomly decided he didn't wasn't ready for a relationship. I think there is more to it, but it might not help you to hear it. 1
Author minou23 Posted August 5, 2017 Author Posted August 5, 2017 What would you say if you texted him though, OP? He was a jerk. I would have nothing more to do with this guy, and I don't buy for a moment that he just randomly decided he didn't wasn't ready for a relationship. I think there is more to it, but it might not help you to hear it. Except my ex of almost two years randomly decided he didn't want a relationship. But that's besides the point. I truly feel his decision was rather impulsive considering how great everything was until it wasn't. I don't know why he did it but he did. Part of me feels it's not over and the other part says he's a jerk don't talk to him. It's so hard fighting my heart though. And I'm such a hopeless romantic. So I question if I just tell him how I feel, will that help me feel like I said and did everything I could have? Even if he doesn't reciprocate at least I know I was honest.
ExpatInItaly Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 Except my ex of almost two years randomly decided he didn't want a relationship. But that's besides the point. I truly feel his decision was rather impulsive considering how great everything was until it wasn't. I don't know why he did it but he did. Part of me feels it's not over and the other part says he's a jerk don't talk to him. It's so hard fighting my heart though. And I'm such a hopeless romantic. So I question if I just tell him how I feel, will that help me feel like I said and did everything I could have? Even if he doesn't reciprocate at least I know I was honest. What do you want to tell him? What do you feel he doesn't already know? His decision might or might not have been impulsive. But the point is he left you hanging when he knew you were trying to reach him and understand what was happening. That is the mark of someone who is either hiding something or being very selfish - neither of which is good. A person almost never randomly decides to end a relationship, unless they're mentally unstable. There is always a reason behind it, though we may not know or truly understand what those reasons are.
Author minou23 Posted August 5, 2017 Author Posted August 5, 2017 What do you want to tell him? What do you feel he doesn't already know? His decision might or might not have been impulsive. But the point is he left you hanging when he knew you were trying to reach him and understand what was happening. That is the mark of someone who is either hiding something or being very selfish - neither of which is good. A person almost never randomly decides to end a relationship, unless they're mentally unstable. There is always a reason behind it, though we may not know or truly understand what those reasons are. I just want to tell him that I miss him and I'm devastated over this and that I want to try to meet up or talk in person. I've been posting on social media, I know it's petty, acting like I'm having fun and everything is fine. But I'm hurting so much inside. And I feel like it worked a little at first to make him jealous or notice me, but not anymore. Anyway I'm gonna lay off of it from now on. I don't want to be immature. But what girl doesn't want to make her recent ex a little bit jealous? Lol
spiderowl Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 I would not tell him any of that. Let him miss you. Let him think you are carrying on reasonably happily without him. If you tell him all you want to, he is just going to feel pressured and back out. It won't do you any good at all. Best to decide this is over and move on. If he wants you, he'll be back, but he should have to prove his dedication to you second time round. It would be a huge mistake to try to get him back, he will think you will hang around waiting for ever and feel no need to win you over at all. 1
Author minou23 Posted August 5, 2017 Author Posted August 5, 2017 I would not tell him any of that. Let him miss you. Let him think you are carrying on reasonably happily without him. If you tell him all you want to, he is just going to feel pressured and back out. It won't do you any good at all. Best to decide this is over and move on. If he wants you, he'll be back, but he should have to prove his dedication to you second time round. It would be a huge mistake to try to get him back, he will think you will hang around waiting for ever and feel no need to win you over at all. But am I supposed to act completely unaffected by it? Could that possibly make him think that I never cared at all? When we ended it I told him I didn't care and wasn't mad just confused. But I acted as nonchalant as possible because I'll admit, my pride can get the best of me. And so far I've been ignoring his direct messages on Instagram about my pics. So how evasive should I be? I'm genuinely asking. I'm not used to these situations AT ALL.
spiderowl Posted August 5, 2017 Posted August 5, 2017 It is obviously up to you, but I do not think liking pictures on instagram amounts to trying to get you back. If he wants you back, he should approach you and apologise. He should be sincere. He is hoping you will cave in and come back to him without him making an effort. It all depends where you feel the blame lies. If he owes you an apology, then why accept anything less? If you accept less than decent, respectful behaviour from him, that is all you will ever get. This is where you set the standard for the kind of behaviour you expect from a guy. It should at a minimum be respectful and loving. 1
Author minou23 Posted August 5, 2017 Author Posted August 5, 2017 It is obviously up to you, but I do not think liking pictures on instagram amounts to trying to get you back. If he wants you back, he should approach you and apologise. He should be sincere. He is hoping you will cave in and come back to him without him making an effort. It all depends where you feel the blame lies. If he owes you an apology, then why accept anything less? If you accept less than decent, respectful behaviour from him, that is all you will ever get. This is where you set the standard for the kind of behaviour you expect from a guy. It should at a minimum be respectful and loving. You're absolutely right. One thing I thought of was that maybe he wanted me to respond to what he was doing so that it looks like me coming back. And then he could keep me around as a back burner girl or a FWB. which I am NOT ok with. But that was just one theory I thought of. The other was that he wanted me to chase him to prove my love. Whatever it is is not good. I need to just move the beep on but it's hard to turn off your feelings!
Author minou23 Posted August 5, 2017 Author Posted August 5, 2017 It is obviously up to you, but I do not think liking pictures on instagram amounts to trying to get you back. If he wants you back, he should approach you and apologise. He should be sincere. He is hoping you will cave in and come back to him without him making an effort. It all depends where you feel the blame lies. If he owes you an apology, then why accept anything less? If you accept less than decent, respectful behaviour from him, that is all you will ever get. This is where you set the standard for the kind of behaviour you expect from a guy. It should at a minimum be respectful and loving. Thank you for your input. You seem like a really genuine and nonjudgmental person. And I feel like you have a way with empowering people. Wish you the best of luck! And thanks again
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