LotusAvx Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 First of all, I am feeling jealous, though I know I shouldn't be, it is not logical and I don't have a reason to be. I met this guy in the winter. We tried going on dates, but he didn't have the end goal of having a relationship and just wanted friends with benefits. Basically, we slept together one time, and since then have been nothing but platonic friends, and we are very close! Last month, I introduced him to a friend of mine who I have become very close with in the past four or so months I have known her. We all hung out on multiple occasions and things were great. They have been hanging out alone a lot which I am totally okay with, since I am not interested in him in that way. But today, they decided to become exclusive. I know I shouldn't be jealous of this..but I guess my reasoning for these unwanted jealous feelings is that when him and I had just met, I was really into him, but he told me he didn't want a relationship with me, or with anyone at this point in his life. 1
preraph Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 Well, so your feelings are hurt because he lied about not wanting a relationship to let you down easy because he wasn't that interested in you that way. Sorry. He's moving on and you should too. I know you can. 1
mikeylo Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 In either case, you know how he is in bed and you may never know that he soon will give the same proposal of FWB to her as well. Don't be jealous. Believe that you got rid of him and now he is her problem!
2much4 Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 This is just your ego playing tricks on you. There's a simple solution: stop being friends with your fwb. Not just this one but in general. Someone who will have a fwb thing with you while knowing you're interested in more is not your friend. Your jealousy is probably about feeling rejected and disrespected. This should be solved by itself once you reclaim your power and boot him out of your life. 2
Scarlett.O'hara Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 Ouch.. I can see why that would trigger those sorts of feelings. It probably feels like the same rejection all over again which is never a nice feeling. The good news is you say that you don't have romantic feelings for him anymore so hopefully the jealousy passes quickly. Just bare in mind that if you hang out a frequently then they will probably unknowingly rub it in your face. I know it might be difficult, but try not to take this too personally, or worse compare yourself to your new friend. Sometimes things happen for a reason and only time will tell what that is.
caveman621 Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 I don't know if this helps, but this happened to me in high school. Girl I liked said she didn't want a relationship with anyone. Then a month later she is in one. WTF? Just tell me the truth if you don't want to be with me. It hurts in the moment, but better than lying and making it linger. Rip the band aid off! 1
smackie9 Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 He is free to chase after anyone he wants. Of course you are jealous because your friend may get what you have so desired....a relationship with this guy. Never expect to get into a relationship with a guy that said no to you. You were ok to hang out with but to him you are not GF material....get your head out of the clouds...this guy is not that into you. Just because you are catching feelings for him doesn't mean he is. I agree...rip the band aid off and move on!
lana-banana Posted July 31, 2017 Posted July 31, 2017 Nobody wants to say "you're a nice person, but I don't see myself falling in love with you". It's perfectly fine to be upset that this guy didn't want a relationship with you, but does with your friend. Hang out with other people until you feel more at ease with them as a couple and don't give yourself a hard time for your feelings. 2
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