mortensorchid Posted July 28, 2017 Posted July 28, 2017 I uploaded Tinder a while ago just to see what I see. I connected with someone who seemed like a good guy based on the conversations we had had. We've been chatting for a few weeks now, I've dropped a few hints (even though I didn't want to) asking what he's doing over the weekend and whatnot. I have discussed more things other than "hi how are you today" kind of things, I discussed things experienced in my summer job which was quite dramatic (as a job coach). Then yesterday I decided to segway into a more direct hint as to possibly meeting. I told him a story about this thing I had for a coworker a few years ago and asked him via text "Want to hang out?" He texted back "I am not interested in you romantically." I texted back "Well love makes you fat, doesn't it?" No contact since. He said that was harsh. And ... Nothing. Another lost cause. He could have picked up the torch and said "Well I'm not like that" at the very least, but ... This is a waste of time.
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted July 28, 2017 Posted July 28, 2017 I have no clue what you meant by "love makes you fat." Is he overweight? 1
SevenCity Posted July 28, 2017 Posted July 28, 2017 I uploaded Tinder a while ago just to see what I see. I connected with someone who seemed like a good guy based on the conversations we had had. Just because he didn't like you romantically, does not make him a bad guy. We've been chatting for a few weeks now, I've dropped a few hints (even though I didn't want to) asking what he's doing over the weekend and whatnot. I have discussed more things other than "hi how are you today" kind of things, I discussed things experienced in my summer job which was quite dramatic (as a job coach). Is that what those hints mean? I had no idea. But, suffice it to say that if a guy is interested he will ask you out. It helps to be open but you don't really need to drop hints. Then yesterday I decided to segway into a more direct hint as to possibly meeting. I told him a story about this thing I had for a coworker a few years ago and asked him via text "Want to hang out?" I'm not a jealous person at all, but it is such a turn off when a woman talks about a guy she liked or how she likes this during sex, how her last relationship made her realize X, etc. I was actually talking with this one woman who's pictures were of her wedding day in a gown with her engagement ring on (they had since divorced). I don't want to hear it. He texted back "I am not interested in you romantically." Response: "Ok, good luck then!" Then unmatch. You are on the site to find someone who is romantically interested. Once he said he was not, he is of no further use to you. I texted back "Well love makes you fat, doesn't it?" No contact since. What does that mean? Are you overweight? I don't get it. He said that was harsh. And ... Nothing. Another lost cause. He could have picked up the torch and said "Well I'm not like that" at the very least, but ... This is a waste of time. Anything after "I'm not interested in you romantically" was a waste of your time. There is nothing to "pick up". You simply move onto someone else. 2
d0nnivain Posted July 28, 2017 Posted July 28, 2017 Once he said he wasn't interested in you romantically there was nothing else to say. He is a lost cause as far as you are concerned. Your story is yet another example of why it pays to meet relatively quickly from a dating app rather than just ending up with a text pal 1
JuneL Posted July 28, 2017 Posted July 28, 2017 Once he said he wasn't interested in you romantically there was nothing else to say. He is a lost cause as far as you are concerned. Your story is yet another example of why it pays to meet relatively quickly from a dating app rather than just ending up with a text pal I think that "I'm not interested in your romantically" quote was part of her story about her getting rejected two years ago, not a response from the current online guy. OP: I think the story you told may make you seem desperate. Not the best story to tell to some possible romantic prospect.
knabe Posted July 28, 2017 Posted July 28, 2017 Expecting someone to read your mind is both ineffective and childish. You need to be direct or just take things at face value - preferably both.
olivetree Posted July 28, 2017 Posted July 28, 2017 OP, please don't tell a story where you got rejected romantically to a romantic prospect. It doesn't look good. Plus your response in the story makes no sense to most people (I don't get it either).
Erik30 Posted July 28, 2017 Posted July 28, 2017 No guy wants to hear about a former crush... Anyway, it's weird that he texted you for a couple of weeks if he had zero interest to begin with, especially on something like Tinder... So maybe it was your story about the co worker that turned him off, or he just realized you two weren't a good match during those weeks of texting
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