Female Co-worker from hell !!! ****Updated****

[Williamjacob]

I am 56 baffled by this woman who is 51. I work with at work. She got on my nerves once and I told our manager I won't work with her because of her mouth. So a few months go by and today we are okay. Just last week I had asked her out to Denny's for breakfast. She accepted it. So after work we both work on the same late night early morning shift.

 

So the day comes we go in different cars. I prefer we use one car she said no. Okay finally find Denny's. Once in there she has to go to the bath room. So I sit and wait. Once she comes out she talks and talks about herself. I don't say a word. Then we order the food. This was 10 minutes to 10 am. The food doesn't come out until after 11:30 am. They say some health inspector is there. I think it's another reason. But okay she didn't like the food and started to complain about it. I was okay with what I had I was so hungry I didn't care.

 

So I considered this date as date number 1, in date number 2 we had gone to all you can eat place for breakfast. That was a little better since was self-serve. I made a comment like boy you can really shove that food down. She had laughed. She isn't fat or obese but she's tight. That one ended well.

 

Date number 3 she came to my townhouse she was dressed to kill. Tight jeans that were torn, I guess that is the modern look. She was hot looking. She come in and I had shown her around the my place. Made her coffee since that's all she I wanted. Suppose to go to the pool to swim but never made it! She wanted to watch TV the Judge one Matthew I think. She never watched and told me to put on the local news. She never watched that either. She gone into the bathroom a few times. The 3rd time she came out in net dress. To me you can see through it. She wanted to be more comfortable. I knew I could see what I shouldn't be seeing but it was right smack in my face.

 

She started to act seductive, with me. I am not shy but I am not lame duck. I told her I could do deep tissue massages she was all over me when I said that. Took out the portable massage table for her. She wanted to take pictures of it. I didn't anything of that. She called up her daughter she was living with her 30 year old who was at work. She called her up for everything that day. Once I got her on the massage table all hell broke loose. I don't need to really tell you the rest but you can get idea of what she had in mind. I wasn't really prepared. I am go at what I do both massaging other oral sex but still now she wants that. She took off her net dress and the rest I can say well surprise me.

 

I hardly know her and yes most people have sex after 3rd date, but I like to get to know her before that. She was wanting it because it's been a very long time. I rather make her happy than me but I had fun. We really never got to go anywhere except for all you can eat Japanese place. Wasn't cheap there she wanted to take pictures inside. That had gone very well but I couldn't get her to come back with me inside. Oh yes she was very stubborn but I got her to let me drive in her car instead of taking two cars to the place. I do not understand why she wants me to drive my car and she drives hers. She told me she never leaves without her car. So she only kissed me on the side of my face never on the lips. We really don't hug or anything. I know but like I said to me everything is strange.

 

Date 4 met her at the casino, didn't really go to eat or anything she had $50 on her card to play. I won but I didn't want to stay because of all the smokers smoking and she said she didn't smoke. Remember what I just said for date 5. I told her I was going and would see her later. She never called and just gone home and then text me she wasn't feeling so good. She wanted a rain check. Rain Check??

 

Yesterday was date number 5, this time I gone over to where she works and told her did you want to go out for breakfast. She said yes. This one she had gone to the casino again. I met her there and with both left but in our own cars again she said she didn't want to leave her car in the parking garage it was free not charge. So this time all you can eat for breakfast. Cost was more the manager asked us what we wanted to drink she said water I said okay water was find no cost. Then she said I can buy my own drinks I don't need you to buy it. But why the sudden outburst.. Then she told me she was only kidding. Can't I take a joke? But was that really a joke.

 

Every time we go out I feel like shes distant from me. Is it a date or just something else. She told me we are out as friends. I told her friends no I am looking for a relationship boyfriend and girlfriend. She wanted to take it slow and get to know each other. I had pushed this why would she use me like this she could pay for herself then. So now she said we can be boyfriend and girl friend but I had to go buy her a diamond ring to show we are together. She didn't want fake diamond either. I just gone along with it. I not ready for all that expense. Plus she going out of town for 2 months for her sick sister who has cancer. Oh I said your not coming back she said yes she would. We can stay in touch by text and cell. But she was going to ship her car with her.

 

That sounds strange she might never come back? Saturday coming up will be date 6 this time she's cooking me home cook meal at her daughters condo where she wants me to meet her 30 year old daughter. She told me on date 4 that I wasn't suppose to have sex her daughter, I was shocked she said that. She wanted me to hangout with her. Why she was gone for 2 months. To me it sounded the most strange to me.

 

I think this woman smokes Newport I see it in her car in the drivers door handle area. This woman is aggressive and I think she has some bi-polar issues. She said in 9th grade she was bullied by some guy and that's why she like this towards all men.

 

Date 7 sounds like she hinted I was going to take her out on fancy dinner date, but I know that won't be happening just yet. There is no date 7 planned. Let me also tell you why she wants to use two cars. So she can talk to whoever calls her on the cell without being asked who the person is she talking too. Another thing I have noticed she contacts her ex men she was with.

 

She also hinted that this Friday night she had wanted to sleep over with me here. I was shocked about that I didn't know she had that planned. I don't think that would work since we have go to work later in the early morning. She plans she changes plans she's very flaking in what she does. What work no one is suppose to know that we're together. So I have to act like we're just co-workers. At time she can be rude and put me down for the oddest things. I confront her about it and she told me she doesn't want to talk about work when she out with me. So nothing fixed. I've spoken to her daughter on the cell phone she seems flaky like her mom also. Seems very attractive though as the mom describes to me.

 

What do you all think about her and me could this work or should I move on. I just feel so confused by her and who's driving who around. I would like to use one car and we both can take turns driving. I don't want to go on 3 hour road drive on my own she just following behind me, what fun is that. I never had dates do this to me. Just to drive with her was like I had to threaten her I do n't want to do that.

 

Other than all this I have learned she follow through might just want to do things for herself and doesn't need a man for anything. I know she hasn't been on any dates. Her last boy friend was 70 year old guy. He had stalked her watching her an everything. There are a few stories from her about her past relationships seem scary to me.

[GemmaUK]

Huh? Why are you going on all these dates with her if she gets on your nerves and you've made a complaint at work about her?

This is not even mentioning all the things you're complaining about here - it doesn't sound like you like her at all.

 

If she keeps telling you it's just friends then believe that. Maybe she was after a FWB situation but it doesn't sound like she wants a relationship with you.

[act00]

In order to be your girlfriend you are required to buy her a diamond ring? No fake diamonds either, mind you. That alone suggests she's after money. Buy her things, take her out. She'll put on the sexy and sex you up, but she's not interested in you.

 

She sounds unpleasant and unstable and definitely selfish. You don't sound happy, but you like the sex and she's gorgeous, so you keep trying to get more than she will ever give. Her personality is probably very fun until she starts complaining about the low-budget breakfasts and who knows what else. She doesn't complain at all when you're shelling out the big bucks. She knows how to work men, and it sounds like she got a diamond ring out of you, so you are a prime target.

 

She's communicating with other men she's playing. She needs to keep the gifts and spoils and money rolling in.

 

You didn't like her as a coworker to the point you complained. Now you're busy getting into her pants and buying her things and wondering what's wrong. She was never a pleasant individual. I don't know why you expected differently. People can behave differently in their personal lives, but her behavior on that first date should have had you running.

 

She's after your money...and don't think for a second she'll make sure her adult daughter is well provided for with your money as well.

 

Dump her.

[mikeylo]

Why are you dating her ?

[seixal]

You've kept going on dates with this woman despite knowing from the start she's not girlfriend material, this probably because she's somehow attractive, and you're lonely. Being too eager to be in relationship makes people accept the unacceptable.

She sounds an unstable woman who only sees you as a casual date and you know it. You also know what is the best thing for you to do.

[Zahara]

She got on my nerves once and I told our manager I won't work with her because of her mouth.

 

That should have been the end of your communication with her.

 

What do you all think about her and me could this work or should I move on. I just feel so confused by her and who's driving who around. I would like to use one car and we both can take turns driving.

 

Move on.

 

The bold is the least of your problems. I mean -- look at how you even worded the title of your post! And you're still dating her?

Edited July 27, 2017 by Zahara

[Williamjacob]

Thank you all for your responses. I did something today just to see for myself the real picture here! I needed to kick myself and get out of this. But I wanted to make sure I was doing the right thing. So I had visited her department she was busy and I asked her if she wanted to go to breakfast. She was excited and said sure. I told her I was going to Walmart to buy somethings. So she could meet-up with me there. Now she was acting up again in the parking lot at Walmart saying she didn't want to go into the store with me. Why should she go she didn't feel like she should go because I wanted her to go, So she said no she was tired. I said okay and i just gone in.

 

She wanted $6 dollars for something I had just asked her for what? She lost it on me started to yell and call me names. I never gave her the money I told her to leave. She left and text back LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE! I said lied about what, taking her out for breakfast. I told her to met me at the Speedway to get some gas for your car. I know but I didn't fill it 100%. She told me to fill it to $15 or full tank. You see how she, she wants this she wants that. I never gave her the $6 because what happen next was the worst of the worst dates I have ever had with her.

 

Some you are right she's talking to other men along side of me. I don't know how she can do that and still be with me. You can see her eyes are wild like she's nutty as a fruit cake. Never gone to breakfast ended up a a sub place but I got just a 1/2 sub, soup and drink. She gone over board got full sub and made it like two different meals. Costing me more. I got her a free drink so I did same something. She started into me and kept going telling that I could force her to be in relationship with me if she didn't want it. She wanted to be just friends and get to know me, but she doesn't like what's going on now. I am standing up for myself after reading all your post here.

 

I am no booty call, F-buddy, casual sex, haven't got her any diamond rings or any gifts. All she got was some gas (she didn't want that) she wanted $6 then she ask for $10. I made an excuse to why I couldn't give her the money. I told her I had to check on something. While we had our subs someone from our job was working in the area and he had seen us. She quickly throw-on your sunglasses. She didn't want him to see her. But he knew me very well and her as well. Too late the cat is out of the bag!

 

I also learned from the queen she wasn't going to cook for me this Saturday she was planning with her daughter to take me out by going to my townhouse instead. I told her NO! You can't do that! She got upset and try to cancel the plans. Like she was doing me a favor by inviting me out with her daughter and grand kids. I am sure I would have ended up paying for that adventure as well.

 

The final outcome of all this was I had walked out of the sub place into my car and later she had knocked on my glass saying if I was going to give her $6 dollars still. I didn't say anything because I did learn that she would have never purchased any meals for me, but she would do it on special like a birthday. I told her in a text I had fun, but I will not be with a woman like her ever again. I am not going to yell at her. She's not worth it!

 

I needed to know where I had stand with her, she was just using me for money where the other men never had taken her out for breakfast/lunch.

I had never got her anything like flowers, booze or that diamond ring. I would never give her the money. I feel if she won't do it for me why should I do it for her. She's so bitter and mean at me I told her all this but who knows if it really matter to her. The threats she made at the our job was the wrong move. I never did anything to her except be friendly. I told her I won't talk to her again. Just keep out of her way.

 

Let's put a final rest on this one, bad woman I will find someone else who's not like this. I've learn my lesson..

[preraph]

She was coming on to you early on. But let's skip to the part where she wants a diamond ring just to be your girlfriend. In case you're wondering -- no, this is not a "thing." This is money grubbing. She's a middle aged woman trying to find a sugar daddy. Lord only knows what she did when she was younger. I would not entertain her any further. Very rude to ask for a diamond ring to be your girlfriend. As if you have to pay her. No.

[Robratory]

Man, I'm so sorry you're going through this. Some people just don't mature no matter how old they get. I've now read your last post, and you did well.

 

We're not too far apart in age, and one thing I've figured out is not to waste time on energy drains like her. The time you're wasting on her you could better spend looking for a woman who isn't like her.

[smackie9]

Just get her a fake ring and slam her silly until she figures it out you got her cubic zirconia instead. Sounds like she's wild and fun....ride'm cowboy!

[Williamjacob]

Thank you all who have responded tonight. I had just got a text message from her. But with the help here I understand more of what I am dealing with. She's a very unstable woman. One of my other friends told me to keep her as a friend. She's on my team so I have to work sometimes along side of her if that happens She's in a different department than me. I won't be going over to that department after what she said and done at the sub place. Her actions was too regretful. Just to say anything to her. I am usually not over there any way, so there is no need to make a special trip just to see her and talk to her like I have been doing these past couple of days.

 

That 1960's movie line "are you trying too seduce me Mrs Robinson" In this case that is what she tried to do too me. Use the sex and come on too wet n' horny to get me into her that way. She planned it all too well. But she didn't count on my actions. I am not like the other men she knows just want to do it to her. I wanted to get to know her first. See where it goes from their. But now she has spoiled it and I told her that in a text a couple of hours ago. I am not buying her anything, I am not taking her out for anything. Dinner was on the plan, but right now I am putting me first. I am busy after work Friday, so there won't be any interaction with her and me. No food for her stomach from me!

Edited July 28, 2017 by Williamjacob

[kendahke]

What do you all think about her

 

Don't poop where you eat.

 

Never date coworkers.

 

I'd leave her alone and block her number. She's clearly got issues that she hasn't dealt with.

 

She hasn't provided for her retirement and is looking for someone whose pension she can get her hands on and spend.

[kendahke]

I work with at work. She got on my nerves once and I told our manager I won't work with her because of her mouth.

 

Going out on 6 dates with her and having sex with her kind of shot this complaint in the foot. You now don't have credibility should this escalate in retaliation on her end--because you don't know how deep her crazy goes.

[knabe]

Sorry. The problem here is you. Man up and stop seeing her.

 

Do you actually read these responses or are you just blogging?

[Chilli]

Mad as a meat axe , sorry brother but l'm glad your out of it.

Hope she doesn't give you any grief at work.

[smackie9]

Keep positive and professional. If she gives you grief go to HR or your supervisor. No one should have to work in a uncomfortable or hostile workplace.

[Williamjacob]

Going out on 6 dates with her and having sex with her kind of shot this complaint in the foot. You now don't have credibility should this escalate in retaliation on her end--because you don't know how deep her crazy goes.

 

Well after that had happen, I never had spoken to her again. A few weeks ago something happen at work where I needed help she was there to help me out a few times. She seem okay at first. I decided to give her another chance and told management to allow her to work with me again and see how it goes. She has a very quick temper I see. I try to not make it worst.

[Williamjacob]

Sorry. The problem here is you. Man up and stop seeing her.

 

Do you actually read these responses or are you just blogging?

 

Yes I read them. Thank you for your concern as well. Today something else happen?

[GorillaTheater]

I try to not make it worst.

 

 

I think you're in for a **** storm at work, one largely of your own making.

[Williamjacob]

My manager and upper management had given her award for efforts at the job today. I was there to cheer and clap. She was nice to me this morning saying good morning and hi. I wasn't giving in to that. Then later on I found out the manager was having her stay in our department to help me out. WHAT!

 

She was so nice to me calling me dear, darling, honey, you so sweet and more. I was so confused. She even ask me if she could have my drink and that we could switched them out because she didn't like what she had endedup. I told her know I don't like what you have to drink. I am sticking with mine. Even after that she was so funny and clever. She go all the work done and more.

 

She hinted at me that I was going to get a huge surprise from her later on? I don't know how to take that? She was suppose to be sleeping over tonight I don't know where that still thanks or what?

 

Don't get me wrong she hard worker and makes upper manager know whats she made of. They had awarded her today for what she has done. I had told her she was getting the award. I see they have passed me up on my award. I am told next week hand out I'll get one. The awards are not just paper they have you access to items on the company corp web site.

 

Tomorrow I was suppose to go to the daughter house to meet her and her two kids. She's another one saying she doesn't need a man 24/7 and she wants to be able to come and go and see whoever she wants too.

 

All I did was ask the mom out for breakfast, that's it nothing else. I wanted to see who she was and breakfast was on me. I had never known it would have gone so long and she would be so different than I had expected.

 

We had both work so close today but I think what I had text her might had really got to her. I know she is unstable in the head, that was caused by a bully in 9th grade she said. He had threaten her and she finally stood-up him but after that she is who she is. Today she can be mean, bitter and more. I really don't know too much about her. Right now I not calling or texting. Just leave it alone. At work she was so nice and sweet, but that's the good side of her it's the bad side of her is what is the issue.

 

All day long she asked me for help, there was a time I had to touch her hand or finger. I said are you giving me the finger. She laugh and smiled. If this could only be like this always. I know it can't the dark side will come out in the end. I had taken a peak to how much have spent on her after 6 dates. Nothing has been gain from this just unsettling at least. Next week Aug 5th she's leaving town for 2 months to take care of her only sister with cancer. She's also shipping her car with her. I ask her if she was coming back she said yes. I don't think so. She'll miss my birthday also. I can't get serious with a mental woman who not clear on the issues.

[kendahke]

She's setting you up.

 

Be professional, but don't give an inch.

I decided to give her another chance and told management to allow her to work with me again and see how it goes.

 

Now you look like a waffler to management. She's spinning a vicious web around you.

[Williamjacob]

She's setting you up.

 

Be professional, but don't give an inch.

 

 

Now you look like a waffler to management. She's spinning a vicious web around you.

 

Management sees everything, but she has them wrapped around her finger. I am not getting involved with her at work or in person. I am down. I see what's she doing. Teasing, playing games at work. I take my work seriously. I wondering what she has in store for me after work. If I don't hear from her I will be alright. I think she got the message to back-off. She got what she wanted the work award. Really have to work with all types of people, there ares some winners and losers but we all have to work as a team. She has her ways I am aware now thanks to you here what she's doing. I will now be on my guard at work. Take back the control. Don't respond to her teasing, flirting gestures like she did yesterday working side-by-side.

 

I had made no contact to her yesterday after work or all day on the phone no text and no calls. She had left me a voice message on my cell. Sounded like she had a smoker voice. Anyway that's a delete anyway.. I'll let you know if anything happens. I just do my work. I going in earlier than her again management told me that yesterday. Just work professionally and that's it. Let her act the fool that she is!

[Williamjacob]

Today I had learned from my Manager she didn't come to work? They had no clue to why she didn't show-up? When I got home this morning she had contacted me by text and cell call. She had acted normally. She said all night she was crying over her sister's cancer with her mom. Caused her to have a panic attack. Even on the phone she was hyperventilating and had to take some deep breath to calm herself down. The phone call lasted about 1 hr 36 mins. It was perfect communication. I was able to make her laugh, telling her about another co-worker who had fallen into a deep sleep laying on her back. I thought the co-worker needed medical attention. I don't get these young people today how come your so tired for work. They call in sick and make up so many excuses not to show up for work. I can tell you I don't do that I am at work 100% never called in for nothing.

 

Anyway I see why she didn't come over Friday night to spend the night. Today she was suppose to have me over the daughters condo but that daughter was called into work today. So she had to watch her two young grand kids. I don't know how she was going to do that if she had gone back to bed. I had mentioned to her you were suppose to cook me dinner since I told you I wasn't going to take you out for no more breakfast, lunch or even dinner. She said she wasn't up to cooking. I told her I would cook instead. But that was at 11 am today it's now after 7 pm not a word. I am not calling because I am very sleepy and I'll just make me something. I am not going to spend any more on her and not even take her and the daughter out with the 2 kids. They're take advantage of my good hospitality. That's why I take them to the buffet because they can choose what they want to eat and how much they can eat. No fear of the bill being over $100.. That had happen once too me. Never again.

 

On well she was suppose to go to the flea market with some guy friend I was allowed to go along. I am not going to that. It sounds like to me with everything said on the phone we was accepting things for face value. I am playing a trip for my vacation. I told her where I am going and she said she would love to go with me. But instead I should visit her at her mom house. That's sad time to see her with her ill sister who's dying of cancer. I am not being mean but I have waited over 6 months to take my vacation.

 

I feel for her but I have to see what I going to do.. I see by then she'll be in the other State which is a winter state they get a lot of snow. I am not ready for snow and don't have any snow coat. Just have to see what happens. I don't think this woman is ever coming back here no do I think she'll leave her 75 year old mom on her own if she looses her only sister. She said they were 4 boys and 2 girls in her family only 3 boys and 2 girls remain. If the older sister goes she won't be the same after that.

 

The oddest thing was said to me from her and her daughter. I told her I wanted to settle down and maybe have kids. She said my daughter wanted another kid. Maybe you can get her pregnant. I was shocked she even suggested that to me. The daughter chuckle at that as well.

[Grumpybutfun]

I think you're in for a **** storm at work, one largely of your own making.

 

This is gonna be good, GT.

G

[GemmaUK]

The oddest thing was said to me from her and her daughter. I told her I wanted to settle down and maybe have kids. She said my daughter wanted another kid. Maybe you can get her pregnant. I was shocked she even suggested that to me. The daughter chuckle at that as well.

 

You're 56, she is 51 and you telling her you want to settle down and have kids?

I'm not surprised they laughed and made a joke about it!