tomoyo Posted July 23, 2017 Share Posted July 23, 2017 I met this guy online a few weeks ago, we texted for a while and finally met up last night. We didn't have a super set plan, his suggestion was a fun night of patio hopping in a trendy area. Things were a touch awkward at first, I'm new to online dating and very shy to begin with, but after a few drinks it felt like we were really connecting. We made jokes, and seemed to be having a great time. Plus he kept giving me "Those eye", you know, where you can see on someones face that they are into you? I think I may have made a collosal mistake though and let the date go on too long. We met up at 5pm, and at 10:30 after hitting a few bars he said "Its your turn to make the decision this time, stay here, find another place, or call it a night?" I figured he wouldn't have put the offer out there if he didn't want to continue and we had been taking turns deciding where to go from each bar, so I said "sure lets find one last fun place!" so we went to the next patio and ended up there until 12. I should have just called it a night at the previous bar, I'm worried I dragged the night out too long, but at the same time it was a saturday night and I didn't want to seem "lame" for going home so early. He walked me to my uber after, gave me a hug goodbye and said we was happy we were finally able to get together, and I told him to keep in touch. Its now 6pm the next day and I haven't heard from him since we parted ways. At first I tried not to think anything of it since we both have very busy work schedules and even when we were just texting sometimes he would take over 12 hours to get back to me, and I am equally guilty of doing the same (We joked about it when we first got together, how we are both terrible texters and how nice it was to have a conversation without a huge lack in between replies). Do you think I should just assume he's not interested? Every date I've ever been on with a guy that is into me they have always texted me either that night after the date or first thing in the morning. I'm really disappointed because in person he had seemed into it and I had thought if he wasn't enjoying my company he wouldn't have stayed out so late with me and would have found a reason to call it a night. Input please? FYI i'm 27 and he is 31. Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Spider Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Why not contact him?? Link to post Share on other sites
mortensorchid Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Follow the 48 hour rule - If you have not heard from him within 48 hours of the first get together, you will not hear from him again 90% of the time. In the remaining 10, he might call / text you a few days later, you might even have a second get together with him, but the second encounter will be the final one you will have with him because he's just a friend. He doesn't really care if you say yes or no to the second get together because he's not that into you, and that will be that on his part. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Text him and tell him you had a great time and it would be nice to go do something fun again sometime. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Sara1989 Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Text him and tell him you had a great time and it would be nice to go do something fun again sometime. Yeah give him a text, it stop the waiting around and worrying as your know then if he is interested or not in seeing you again. Link to post Share on other sites
mortensorchid Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Text him and tell him you had a great time and it would be nice to go do something fun again sometime.[/quote Do you want to be double disappointed? Is there anything worse than sending a text and having no response because that person is avoiding you? Same with a phone call not returned. Wait for him to do something. If he does nothing then you know he's not interested. If you reach out and he does not respond, you'll feel double bad. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Usually what happens when a woman who is stressing over a guy she just met and she reaches out first he responds, she's still thinking "would he have contacted me if I didn't reach out?" Then she starts the whole "did he just answer me to be nice?" And, she's still wondering if he's really interested. Either way, you just need to sit back a little and observe. Reach out, observe whether he keeps the momentum so to speak. You initiate and then let him initiate again if he's going to. Link to post Share on other sites
roncollins Posted July 24, 2017 Share Posted July 24, 2017 Do you think I should just assume he's not interested? I don't think you should conclude that he isn't interested just yet. It's just less that 24 hours since you both got together, so it's too early to conclude However, if he isn't interested in you, it's not because you hang out too long with him. He might have some other reasons why but not because you stayed out with him that long. Link to post Share on other sites
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