IDontLikeNeko Posted July 23, 2017 Posted July 23, 2017 I met this guy on a dating site. We've been talking to each other for about 5 months now. Ironically, we're both not really looking for a relationship, especially me. He seems to want to find dates though. Anyway: it's been going quite well between the 2 of us, we are friends now. I have been slowly developing feelings for him for quite some time, I like him a lot actually. With each conversation it's getting more and more difficult for me to maintain our friendship. It hurts talking to him and the fact that I can never have him depresses me so much. Why? simply because he lives in a complete different country. I'm completely against long distance dating and I know it wouldn't work. I've been thinking about blocking him everywhere and never talk to him again.. this friendship is torturing me but at the same time the idea of leaving him would hurt me just as much. I tried to block him a week ago, but he didn't let me.. so I gave in. But now I'm seriously thinking that I should do it again but be way more stricter this time. I plan on sending him a huge letter explaining everything and telling him how I truly feel. Yesterday he told me that he might be going on a "very weird" double date and that it's going to be awkward and so on. Hearing that made me cry, which is so pointless since I know I can't have him either way. Also, I don't know if this feeling is mutual.. but it doesn't matter to me. It wouldn't change the fact that we're simply not meant for each other. So what should I do? Do you think I should keep talking to him or not? Maybe this feeling will fade away over time and we can just be friends.. Could I be too pessimistic? Idk, what do you guys think?
coolheadal Posted July 23, 2017 Posted July 23, 2017 *Block and delete Your wasting your life and time with a man who's doing whatever he pleases. Got to wake-up out of this dream state and see what's really going on nothing. He's not with you 100% you can't feel or touch him. Can't even kiss him on the lips. You are not a BF or GF or both you are just another node- this is space on network signal. Yes I am being blunt with you but you really got to see the facts are you far from him. He's dating more people your crying and for what he's not worth it my dear. Stop hurting yourself over this jerk. You need to grown-up and go and meet someone real you can be with. Do not settle for anyone you can't be with for real. Fake love is not the answer. * 4
Author IDontLikeNeko Posted July 23, 2017 Author Posted July 23, 2017 *Block and delete Your wasting your life and time with a man who's doing whatever he pleases. Got to wake-up out of this dream state and see what's really going on nothing. He's not with you 100% you can't feel or touch him. Can't even kiss him on the lips. You are not a BF or GF or both you are just another node- this is space on network signal. Yes I am being blunt with you but you really got to see the facts are you far from him. He's dating more people your crying and for what he's not worth it my dear. Stop hurting yourself over this jerk. You need to grown-up and go and meet someone real you can be with. Do not settle for anyone you can't be with for real. Fake love is not the answer. * okay, thank you for the advice. There's another small thing that is holding me back: when I tried to leave him, he started to panic and tried his best to make me stay.. so that's confusing me even more. Also, he's trying to get into the military very badly. Maybe I'm just dreaming.. but there could be a small chance that he's trying to do that because he knows that soldiers in the US are allowed to live overseas. We have lots of US military bases in my country. So maybe he's secretly trying to do that.. But yeah I guess you're right.
roncollins Posted July 23, 2017 Posted July 23, 2017 First, you can't be having feelings for someone you haven't even met. Having feelings for someone you just met online and barely know is a big mistake. Also, you already know what to do. If talking to him when you know you may never get to meet him makes you depressed, then stop talking to him. If you don't stop it now, you will be more hurt in the future.
Robratory Posted July 24, 2017 Posted July 24, 2017 Because you have feelings for him, you're making this out to be a bigger thing than it is. First, get a boyfriend in the real world. Second, don't block this guy. He's just an online friend. Keep him as a pen-pal. I have someone like that across the country. We met in an online game, but we're literally across the country from each other, so we just drop each other a hello ever three or four months. Third, in the future, resist developing feelings for people you haven't met in the real world.
smackie9 Posted July 24, 2017 Posted July 24, 2017 If you are serious about finding yourself a BF, then stop being someone's penpal. I get it you are thirsty for male attention and he was giving it to you, but it's a bad situation to get yourself out of. STOP DOING IT. Have a check list of priorities...#1 find guys locally, #2, don't invest in anyone until they take you out on plenty of dates and treat you respectfully, #3 Don't chat with someone for weeks. If they don't ask you out within the first few messages, then move on. #4 Don't get sucked in by love bombing or a guy that just seems to say the right things. And the advice above...you don't get anywhere finding a BF if you spend your feelings on this penpal. It's a bad habit to get into. It prevents you from finding the real Mr. right. 2
Gr8fuln2020 Posted July 24, 2017 Posted July 24, 2017 okay, thank you for the advice. There's another small thing that is holding me back: when I tried to leave him, he started to panic and tried his best to make me stay.. so that's confusing me even more. Also, he's trying to get into the military very badly. Maybe I'm just dreaming.. but there could be a small chance that he's trying to do that because he knows that soldiers in the US are allowed to live overseas. We have lots of US military bases in my country. So maybe he's secretly trying to do that.. But yeah I guess you're right. Do away with this. Not certain what country you are in, but even if he did make that HUGE commitment, passes basic training, etc. HE DOESN'T GET TO CHOOSE WHICH COUNTRY TO SERVE IN. 2
the_lost_1 Posted July 24, 2017 Posted July 24, 2017 I met this guy on a dating site. We've been talking to each other for about 5 months now. Ironically, we're both not really looking for a relationship, especially me. Stopped reading there. Why bother if you're not interested? No action, no date, no nothing. 5 months of talk and no action or love. 1
coolheadal Posted July 24, 2017 Posted July 24, 2017 (edited) okay, thank you for the advice. There's another small thing that is holding me back: when I tried to leave him, he started to panic and tried his best to make me stay.. so that's confusing me even more. Also, he's trying to get into the military very badly. Maybe I'm just dreaming.. but there could be a small chance that he's trying to do that because he knows that soldiers in the US are allowed to live overseas. We have lots of US military bases in my country. So maybe he's secretly trying to do that.. But yeah I guess you're right. My dear child just not going to end well for you. He panics because the feel of losing you. But he knows what to say and to get you to change your mind. Change your mind you need to be in control of your life! Do not let anyone say otherwise. Block and delete gives you peace of mind to know you can move on. You need a real man, real love, and a real life! Do not settle for fake love life.. Edited July 24, 2017 by coolheadal 3
Author IDontLikeNeko Posted July 27, 2017 Author Posted July 27, 2017 *Block and delete Your wasting your life and time with a man who's doing whatever he pleases. Got to wake-up out of this dream state and see what's really going on nothing. He's not with you 100% you can't feel or touch him. Can't even kiss him on the lips. You are not a BF or GF or both you are just another node- this is space on network signal. Yes I am being blunt with you but you really got to see the facts are you far from him. He's dating more people your crying and for what he's not worth it my dear. Stop hurting yourself over this jerk. You need to grown-up and go and meet someone real you can be with. Do not settle for anyone you can't be with for real. Fake love is not the answer. * My dear child just not going to end well for you. He panics because the feel of losing you. But he knows what to say and to get you to change your mind. Change your mind you need to be in control of your life! Do not let anyone say otherwise. Block and delete gives you peace of mind to know you can move on. You need a real man, real love, and a real life! Do not settle for fake love life.. LOL you guys were all wrong we took it to the next level and now I'm feeling content
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