NewfieEd Posted July 14, 2017 Posted July 14, 2017 Hi, I've been dating a girl steady for 6 months and before that we were talking for a few months but nothing serious. I work a lot of short term construction jobs and have been laid off for 6 months. She tells me she can't "'move things to the next stage" until I secure I permanent job so there is stability. I kind of understand her thought process on that because I'm 30 and she is 28 and she has a good permanent job. I find it hard though because she has never even brought me to meet her parents after 6 months. She said she don't want to get in "over her head" as she was recently out of a 5 year relationship as we began talking. She just went on a 4 day vacation with her mom and her mom's work colleagues. She came back yesterday and immediately was acting strange. She immediately asked me did I find a permanent job yet. As the conversation progressed she said "I know what I need I just don't know what I want" and began telling me maybe she needs to be single so she can go out and have some drinks and feel no pressure. Is her interest gone? Is she just upset I don't have a permanent job? Should I walk away before I get hurt ?
Gaeta Posted July 14, 2017 Posted July 14, 2017 There is no good reason for you to be off work for 6 months if you work construction in Canada! Go out there and find a new contractor to give you work. You are only 30 years old, do you have a trade? if not go get one and get your construction cards. Your gf was just out of a 5 year relationship when she met you, you were her rebound. I am sorry but when someone suggest they would be better being single it's their way of breaking up with you. Let her go, she is done. 2
Erik30 Posted July 14, 2017 Posted July 14, 2017 I agree with Gaeta, sorry but it looks like she's slowly heading for the exit... your job situation gives her a "perfect" excuse. If it wasn't that, she probably would've found something else. She basically already told you she wants to end it... 1
kendahke Posted July 14, 2017 Posted July 14, 2017 Hi, I've been dating a girl steady for 6 months and before that we were talking for a few months but nothing serious. I work a lot of short term construction jobs and have been laid off for 6 months. She tells me she can't "'move things to the next stage" until I secure I permanent job so there is stability. I kind of understand her thought process on that because I'm 30 and she is 28 and she has a good permanent job. I find it hard though because she has never even brought me to meet her parents after 6 months. She said she don't want to get in "over her head" as she was recently out of a 5 year relationship as we began talking. She just went on a 4 day vacation with her mom and her mom's work colleagues. She came back yesterday and immediately was acting strange. She immediately asked me did I find a permanent job yet. As the conversation progressed she said "I know what I need I just don't know what I want" and began telling me maybe she needs to be single so she can go out and have some drinks and feel no pressure. Is her interest gone? Yes her interest is gone. Her mom and her mom's buddies made sure of that. Is she just upset I don't have a permanent job? No. Her mom and her mom's buddies are. They worked on her while on vacation. She ran your relationship past their committee and they voted you out. In order to not lose face to them, she's giving you the boot. Should I walk away before I get hurt ? I would dump her for no other reason than she's not grown enough to make her own decisions. She still needs mommy making her decisions for her. You don't want that kind of interference in your relationship because that's what's on the horizon when it comes to this one. All of your business will be in the aisles of her mom's workplace. Dump her and be grateful you dodged a messy bullet. It might also be time for you to turn your attention towards securing more steady employment. That may serve as a detriment to other women who do own their own minds and don't run their relationships past committees for approval. 1
kendahke Posted July 14, 2017 Posted July 14, 2017 I'm curious: Are you financially solvent where you have enough money set aside to afford/withstand a downturn in employment? If you have an independent source of income, that's far better than being on the dole until more work materializes.
smackie9 Posted July 14, 2017 Posted July 14, 2017 Her mom and auntie gave her the "Mom" talk during that vaycay. Prob straightened her out, telling her she should be doing other things for herself rather than waiting around for some dude she is dating, to get a steady full time job, not to mention the fact she was stuck in a 5 year relationship that went nowhere. It's pretty much a no brainer it's over. Finalize her pending decision. 3
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