SammySammy Posted July 13, 2017 Posted July 13, 2017 Agreed, but if their visions are different, then why conform to his? She doesn't have to. He doesn't have to marry her either.
Author miss.lost Posted July 13, 2017 Author Posted July 13, 2017 You do what level you are comfortable with. One thing you want to do is leave time to have a LIFE outside work. Otherwise, what IS the point of living? Right now it is not possible till I graduate. I chose the accelerated but shorter program comparing to longer but less demanding and this is the price I am paying. If i decide to get MSN, I will definitely make sure I have time for a life outside work and school
CloudyHead Posted July 14, 2017 Posted July 14, 2017 I think you need to work on your self-esteem and stop with the self-doubting. You should be proud of your accomplishments. When I was in my 20's, I made the decision to concentrate on my education and career path and made a point not to have serious relationships with men until I completed my education and began my career so that I made choices/decisions based on myself and not someone else. Now, 25 years after getting my doctorate and having an established career, the whole education and what someone does for a living is not as important as it was when I was young. Finding someone who treats you well, loves you and cares about you and your well-being is what is important. There is no way I would date any man in my profession at this point in my life. Most are too arrogant and untrustworthy. 1
OatsAndHall Posted July 14, 2017 Posted July 14, 2017 I believe that you are misconstruing his statements and are reading into them. As has been pointed out, most guys could care less about status. I don't know anything about the entirety of your conversations but he might be trying to be helpful if you have mentioned your debt or your college struggles. Or, he may just be paying you a compliment by stating that you're smart enough to go to med school. I had this issue in my last serious relationship. My ex was working a dead-end job that she complained about incessantly. She had mentioned going back to school with a specific career track in mind and I told her that I thought she should jump on it on several occasions. At one point, she did take it as me judging her and we had a blunt conversation about it. I told her that she clearly wasn't happy with her life and that I was suggesting ways that she could fix that. I could careless that she was working a dead-end job as she was supporting herself and being responsible with her money. Plus, at the end of the day, the guy treats you well, is supportive of what you're doing and has his own life together. You can't ask for much more than that.
MountainGirl111 Posted July 14, 2017 Posted July 14, 2017 It is frustrating because if I do decide to apply for MSN, it should only be because I thought it was the best option for me and not because of someone else. Thanks for reading. Any experiences and thoughts welcome. And please be honest, I need to, either, be ok with him, or leave him and focus on school. It's becoming exhausting.-op Bingo, OP. I'm not a guidance counselor, but I think people need to do what they really feel they want to do or feel called to do or INSPIRED to do...not just do something because it's "expected" of them. But, is he really giving you messages that he would think more highly of you if you were to further your education? If that is so, if that is how he TRULY feels, then it makes me wonder what the future holds for you, and him, as a couple. Will you continue to feel you are not "accomplished" enough for him? Will HE feel you are not "accomplished" enough for him? Or, is it just your own self doubts and inner dialogue that is making you doubt whether you are really good enough for him? See, the most healthy relationships are ones in which we feel loved, accepted, supported for just who we are, but also ones that inspire us as well ....and being "just a nurse", well, honey that's a bit of an oxymoron. No nurse is "just a nurse". It's a high calling and requires a lot of a person, no matter if you are masters level or not. High responsibility. High wages too, for the most part. So, don't KNOCK yourself down before you've even graduated!! Right now, I think you need to concentrate on finishing nursing school and not worry so much about what he thinks of you. Easier said than done. He sounds impressive, afterall....but you sound impressive too, just the way you are. As with many things in life, it's not so much about how much you "accomplish" according to what other people view in terms of being "successful", but it's about whether or not you yourself as an individual are happy/fulfilled. And, keep in mind that you can always further your career...IF that is what YOU really want to do...... Happiness, fulfillment: those are highly individualized things that are different for everyone. So, know yourself and know what it's going to take to be happy. 1
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