VagabondT Posted July 10, 2017 Posted July 10, 2017 Hi there, I have recently met this extremely nice Italian guy on Bumble. He is one of those rare kind of guys who texts in paragraphs, asks engaging questions to try to know as much as he can about you. You can tell he is a good, innocent and naive man who doesn't really have a lot of experience with New York dating life (moved here 4 months ago from a small town in Italy) On our first date, we walked around central park, talked for hours. It was nice, he was a complete gentleman but I wasn't very interested partly because he mostly talked about his work and I had terrible headache that made staying engaged much harder. Anyway, I decided to give him another chance and we went on a second dinner, movie & bar date. I was more into him and very much enjoyed his company. We ended up having sex that night. It was amazing and intimate. I stayed over, and enjoyed cuddling with someone for the first time in a long time. He asked me what I wanted out of "this", and he responded he wanted to spend good time with someone, going on dates, museums, sort of being like a couple but not taking on the burden of a relationship I guess?? Which is exactly what I want. (Both of us got out of long serious relationships a year ago) The other day we texted as usual. Then he got very sick for a week (couldn't even go to work) and our conversations started to get less and less frequent. I offered to help him with food and stuff since he was too sick to get out of bed but he responded he didn't want me or anyone for matter of fact to see him like this because he always strives to look healthy and strong, which is more than fair. Still, at this point, I can't tell whether he is just not that interested in me or it's the sickness. I texted him I wanted to see him before I leave but he said it would have been nice but he's in such a terrible state that it is not worth it.(Plus didn't know I was leaving this week) I mean he is miserable, it's normal that he feels this way. And I would have been totally understanding in normal circumstances but I am leaving New York for almost 2 months this week so I have this urgency to see him. Not because I will be devastated in his absence but mostly because if it's going to be something, even a causal thing, when I get back I feel like we just HAVE to meet one last time before I leave. Maybe I am being too dramatic or self-absorbed. I have a tendency to try to control my relationships... Anyway the question is should I ask him one more time? Or just let things go? Or idk, what should I do?
Erik30 Posted July 10, 2017 Posted July 10, 2017 Why do you think I should move on? Because you only went out on 2 dates, and you both agreed it should stay casual. He obviously has no desire to see you that bad before you leave, and it kind of conflicts with his and your "no relationship" view. 2
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