Fuerza Posted July 9, 2017 Posted July 9, 2017 Hi everyone, I was in a very short relationship with this guy for a few months and broke it off with him a I always had the feeling he was not 100% honest with me. This women (lets call her Sarah) posted hearts on his pictures he would post on fb, but he always would say that it was nothing blablabla. Fast forward to last week, months of NC, suddenly he calls me back, asking if we can meet up. So we did, we talked, kissed and almost went further. Friday I had a call with him as he wasn't contacting me anymore so I felt something was up. Let's meet up on Saturday he says, sure. Find out on Saturday he blocked me on Whatsapp, then proceeds to post pictures of him and his gf (Sarah) on social media. I had a good laugh, as he was trying to get to me by posting those pictures. This girl looks a lot like me, which makes it even more weird. Anyways, my dilemma is, should I tell Sarah that he was cheating on her? This guy is mentally quite unstable, he loves drama and he did all of this just to get back to me. But this girl deserves better, what do I do?
coolheadal Posted July 9, 2017 Posted July 9, 2017 Hi everyone, I was in a very short relationship with this guy for a few months and broke it off with him a I always had the feeling he was not 100% honest with me. This women (lets call her Sarah) posted hearts on his pictures he would post on fb, but he always would say that it was nothing blablabla. Fast forward to last week, months of NC, suddenly he calls me back, asking if we can meet up. So we did, we talked, kissed and almost went further. Friday I had a call with him as he wasn't contacting me anymore so I felt something was up. Let's meet up on Saturday he says, sure. Find out on Saturday he blocked me on Whatsapp, then proceeds to post pictures of him and his gf (Sarah) on social media. I had a good laugh, as he was trying to get to me by posting those pictures. This girl looks a lot like me, which makes it even more weird. Anyways, my dilemma is, should I tell Sarah that he was cheating on her? This guy is mentally quite unstable, he loves drama and he did all of this just to get back to me. But this girl deserves better, what do I do? You shouldn't get involved and lets say you did! Would Sarah believe you? Do you have any proof? See what he did he used you to get back and you and your weak so he had taken advantage of you. Playing the devil advocate here will not help you with gaining revenge like that. Best leave his affair alone, because he so unstable mentally he might come back to you and do his worst, then the police would have to get involved. Stop and move on best advise to you! 1
Author Fuerza Posted July 9, 2017 Author Posted July 9, 2017 You shouldn't get involved and lets say you did! Would Sarah believe you? Do you have any proof? See what he did he used you to get back and you and your weak so he had taken advantage of you. Playing the devil advocate here will not help you with gaining revenge like that. Best leave his affair alone, because he so unstable mentally he might come back to you and do his worst, then the police would have to get involved. Stop and move on best advise to you! It's not fair though, he just gets to cheat and not even deal with the consequences of it? I don't care for him and I don't regret kissing him, it just confirmed to me that I do not want to be with him.
coolheadal Posted July 9, 2017 Posted July 9, 2017 It's not fair though, he just gets to cheat and not even deal with the consequences of it? I don't care for him and I don't regret kissing him, it just confirmed to me that I do not want to be with him. I see you really love him more than he loved you. Sorry about that but he's a cheater and you really best you know now. You said you laugh it off. Please my child try to cope, you have to try.. He is not worth it..
ExpatInItaly Posted July 9, 2017 Posted July 9, 2017 OP, do you have any proof? Incriminatig messages he sent you? Having been Sarah in a similar scenario, I would have appreciated a heads-up about the guy's extra-curriculars. If I were you, I would try to contact her and simply inform her that you were dating him in XYZ period and attach the messages from him. And leave it at that. Whether or not she believes you, well, that isn't your probelm. 3
Author Fuerza Posted July 9, 2017 Author Posted July 9, 2017 OP, do you have any proof? Incriminatig messages he sent you? Having been Sarah in a similar scenario, I would have appreciated a heads-up about the guy's extra-curriculars. If I were you, I would try to contact her and simply inform her that you were dating him in XYZ period and attach the messages from him. And leave it at that. Whether or not she believes you, well, that isn't your probelm. I do, messages, pictures, even a video of him. I won't message her though, I'm not in the mood for the drama, I don't care about this guy and I just want to put this behind me asap.
elaine567 Posted July 9, 2017 Posted July 9, 2017 I do, messages, pictures, even a video of him. I won't message her though, I'm not in the mood for the drama, I don't care about this guy and I just want to put this behind me asap. Keep them in a safe place just in case he decides to start a "campaign" against you. Mentally unstable people who love drama can get carried away so keep any "proof" to protect yourself. 2
Author Fuerza Posted July 9, 2017 Author Posted July 9, 2017 Keep them in a safe place just in case he decides to start a "campaign" against you. Mentally unstable people who love drama can get carried away so keep any "proof" to protect yourself. That's the thing, I know for a fact he won't be together for long with her so it's literally just a waiting game until they break up again and he will contact me again and become all drama like. Even in the pictures he posted with her, she looked SO uncomfortable. When that time comes I will burn his ass. At least now I know the truth, I always had a suspicion and it's nice to know my gut was right. Thank you, those pictures are definitely in a safe place now 1
coolheadal Posted July 9, 2017 Posted July 9, 2017 That's the thing, I know for a fact he won't be together for long with her so it's literally just a waiting game until they break up again and he will contact me again and become all drama like. Even in the pictures he posted with her, she looked SO uncomfortable. When that time comes I will burn his ass. At least now I know the truth, I always had a suspicion and it's nice to know my gut was right. Thank you, those pictures are definitely in a safe place now Heed my warning those who do harm to oneself should not do harm to another soul. The think is my child yes he did wrong but you don't have to do the same. Why bother with such a guy he is unfaithful. Let him be with who he wants if he wanted to be with you he would be there with you now, but he's not! Let this go get rid of the pictures of you two. Why encourage her to keep this up let it go! He's dangerous sort I wouldn't bother with him again because you can't trust this type of guy with any relationship. You warn this other girl what happens he'll go after you.. But you have the law on your side just be careful when it comes to relationships even the most of us love and can be hurt by love.
Author Fuerza Posted July 9, 2017 Author Posted July 9, 2017 Heed my warning those who do harm to oneself should not do harm to another soul. The think is my child yes he did wrong but you don't have to do the same. Why bother with such a guy he is unfaithful. Let him be with who he wants if he wanted to be with you he would be there with you now, but he's not! Let this go get rid of the pictures of you two. Why encourage her to keep this up let it go! He's dangerous sort I wouldn't bother with him again because you can't trust this type of guy with any relationship. You warn this other girl what happens he'll go after you.. But you have the law on your side just be careful when it comes to relationships even the most of us love and can be hurt by love. Oh I won't do anything, karma will catch up to him, strong believer of that.
d0nnivain Posted July 9, 2017 Posted July 9, 2017 Unless you know Sarah I'd just walk away & leave them to their drama & dysfunction. She may not believe you. She may not care. He will probably gaslight her. Do you really want to be dragged into the middle of their mess? If you must send her a quick factual note but make it clear you want nothing to do with him. This is just an FYI heads up for her. 2
lovely81 Posted July 11, 2017 Posted July 11, 2017 I told in this situation, no regrets. I did do it in the factual way. I really disliked being complicit in lying. It was a tremendous relief to tell and also had the side benefit of getting him to stay away from me.
phineas Posted July 11, 2017 Posted July 11, 2017 It's not fair though, he just gets to cheat and not even deal with the consequences of it? I don't care for him and I don't regret kissing him, it just confirmed to me that I do not want to be with him. If you didn't care, you wouldn't make this thread. just walk away and forget him. the number of women i've met from online who i slept with then later found out were married......just delete them from your life. Not even worth getting worked up over.
mrs rubble Posted July 11, 2017 Posted July 11, 2017 I was in your situation some years back. I messaged his fiancé via Facebook messenger, she didn't believe me and married him anyway, and had a baby with him (maybe more by now). I felt relieved to unburden myself of the guilt as I would never have gotten involved with someone in a relationship. Just like in lovely81's case, he's stayed away from me ever since. He contacted me once after I told her, just to abuse me for telling her. I only know about his wedding and baby through mutual friends. I have no doubt that he is probably still mucking around with others, because even when I was sleeping with him (it was a FWB type arrangement) he confessed to me about going to gay bars and picking up men for oral sex.
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