michael_01 Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 I'll make this as quick as possible. We're in our early-mid 30s. We met on Tinder, and after a month and a half of messaging, texting, and even phone sex, we met for our first date. Date 1: Drinks at trendy bar. Then back to her place for sex. Date 2: Drinks at Irish Pub. Then back to her place for sex. Date 3: Drinks at trendy bar. Then back to her place for sex. Dates 4-6: Drinks at her place. Then sex. Date 7: Tomorrow-Day at her pool, then back to her place for drinks. Probably sex. We really click and have a lot in common, but every date since the begining has ended in sex. And she usually kicks me out pretty quickly after we finish. Our texts imply a deeper connection, but I can't figure it out. My promiscuous college days and 20s are behind me. I want a relationship. Our texts imply this, but our dates are just sex. This is what I wanted 10 years ago. But now, I want a partner. We keep talking about having talks about stuff, but it never happens. What does everyone think?
fred123 Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 you dont stay the night not even once? she has never asked you to or you never asked?
scooby-philly Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 So.... One though - maybe she didn't have wild or crazy college days or 20's. And now she's going through her "hoe" phase. But....it could also point to deeper emotional stuff if she's not asked you to sleep over once. A fear of being hurt? A fear of being seen (like her "true self" since you'd be around in her "safe" zone). Or it could be something even deeper. Regardless, in this case while you're receiving the physical aspect of a great relationship, sounds like you're not getting the real emotional part. that has to be discussed and directly. Otherwise, who knows how long the erratic behavior might continue.
staggerlee71 Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 Her asking you leave and not staying the night, every time, is a clear indication this is a physical relationship for her. Texts are words. 4
rushed Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 Why don't you ask her out on a date that doesn't involve drinks? Like a hike or a museum. 1
act00 Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 Being asked to leave once the deed is done is really not a great sign. If you can't talk to her and discuss what you want in this land of dating and your relationship together isn't a good sign either. I think finding some other activities to do together that doesn't revolve around drinks and sex would be a good idea. You'll probably end up at home having sex, but you'll get some connection beyond that. Is there a reason you never connect at your place? 1
Bastile Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 Sounds like she's satisfied at the level which you are. And it sounds like you aren't satisfied with that. Just have a sexual relationship with her whilst you continue your search for something different elsewhere.
coolheadal Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 I'll make this as quick as possible. We're in our early-mid 30s. We met on Tinder, and after a month and a half of messaging, texting, and even phone sex, we met for our first date. Date 1: Drinks at trendy bar. Then back to her place for sex. Date 2: Drinks at Irish Pub. Then back to her place for sex. Date 3: Drinks at trendy bar. Then back to her place for sex. Dates 4-6: Drinks at her place. Then sex. Date 7: Tomorrow-Day at her pool, then back to her place for drinks. Probably sex. We really click and have a lot in common, but every date since the begining has ended in sex. And she usually kicks me out pretty quickly after we finish. Our texts imply a deeper connection, but I can't figure it out. My promiscuous college days and 20s are behind me. I want a relationship. Our texts imply this, but our dates are just sex. This is what I wanted 10 years ago. But now, I want a partner. We keep talking about having talks about stuff, but it never happens. What does everyone think? Drinks, some fun, back at either places for sex and your both gone.. That's it another booty call or open sex, just not into a serious relationship. You both act like you doing each other a favor like a matter of convenience for each other. If you don't like this, pull her over and speak to her and tell her how you feel and what you want. But don't be surprise to learn this is all she wants from you right now. Your not the serious type of relationship your a need and a fix and quickie then drop of $100 bill and gone. In the movies that's how it would sound.. Who wants this? I sure don't and sound like you don't either. Speak-up or just stop doing this and find a woman who wants you, and can fall in love with you both ways! This what you told use is lousy, not healthy cheap life with no way to end!
smackie9 Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 Her asking you leave and not staying the night, every time, is a clear indication this is a physical relationship for her. Texts are words. This^^^^ this is what this is. You want more?? communicate that IN PERSON. If she bails on the idea... you just saved yourself from wasting your time.
Redhead14 Posted July 3, 2017 Posted July 3, 2017 I'll make this as quick as possible. We're in our early-mid 30s. We met on Tinder, and after a month and a half of messaging, texting, and even phone sex, we met for our first date. Date 1: Drinks at trendy bar. Then back to her place for sex. Date 2: Drinks at Irish Pub. Then back to her place for sex. Date 3: Drinks at trendy bar. Then back to her place for sex. Dates 4-6: Drinks at her place. Then sex. Date 7: Tomorrow-Day at her pool, then back to her place for drinks. Probably sex. We really click and have a lot in common, but every date since the begining has ended in sex. And she usually kicks me out pretty quickly after we finish. Our texts imply a deeper connection, but I can't figure it out. My promiscuous college days and 20s are behind me. I want a relationship. Our texts imply this, but our dates are just sex. This is what I wanted 10 years ago. But now, I want a partner. We keep talking about having talks about stuff, but it never happens. What does everyone think? It is past the time when you should have had a conversation about what each of you is looking for out of your dating journeys. You make a statement that you are looking for a long-term partner for yourself and then let her tell you what she's wanting for herself. If she isn't on the same page in terms of overall dating goals, you move on. Right now, it's not about whether it will be between the two of you, but just to make sure you want the same thing. If she's looking for that too, great. And the next time you sleep there, make a plan with her the night before to take her out for breakfast and spend the day with her. If there isn't an indication from you that you're want to spend more time, she probably just lets you leave . . .
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