Wanderlust2386 Posted June 29, 2017 Posted June 29, 2017 I've been dating this girl since Feb. We've broken up almost 5 times now, because she has a lot of trust issues and in my opinion were completely silly overreactions/reasons. However this last time, she "really meant it". We aren't back together and its been about 2 weeks now. The thing is she always asks me to hang out with her. I'm still seeing her 4 or 5 times a week and spending the night at her house. She kisses me and cuddles me and holds my hand in the car, but she won't have sex with me or commit to me and tells me all the time "we will never be together." I drive her around everyone, buy her things, take care of her, etc... and I'm starting to get depressed because I'm still very much in love with her. I know sex may not be everything, but I find myself constantly wanting it - wanting more when I'm around her and on several occasions find myself falling asleep in her arms holding back tears. I can't seem to let go. She is moving away in a few weeks and I know I will have to but it's so hard. I keep going back and spending time with her because I know I may never see her again. I don't know what to do. She is totally messing with my mind. She even made a point to tell me she went on a date the other night which I feel was some way to just piss me off because she's moving and dating for her at this point is useless. Is she just using me for comfort? How do I let go?
dumbass2 Posted June 29, 2017 Posted June 29, 2017 She's leaving soon. She's not giving you what you want and she's not going to before she leaves. You want to let go? Absolute best thing is to tell her now, don't wait, that you wish her the best but you will not being seeing or contacting her again from this point on and request she not contact you and stick to it. No more contact. Block her after that. Trust me, once I did this with my ex as I saw no hope just like you, it gave me the power to move on because I made the decision and took charge of my life again and just felt good not to have all the feelings of hope. That's what keeps you from letting go. You have no hope. Tell her today.
kendahke Posted June 29, 2017 Posted June 29, 2017 You begin to let go by not going over to her place. Stop spending time with someone you cannot get along with. You don't have to get her permission to stop seeing her. You just do it and you block her from contacting you. Would do her some good to know she can't yank your chain when she wants amusement and someone to laugh at. Breaking up and getting back together 5 times screams incompatibility. This isn't going to work out no matter how hard you try to force the fit. All the time and energy you're wasting on her could be invested in someone who wants what you want, but you're not going to find her as long as your energy is wrapped up around someone who wants all the perks of relationship and not the obligations of relationship. Let go of her, block her and move on with your life. She's manipulating you with the cuddles and all that mess and anyone who manipulates you should be dropped off at the mall and you keep going.
Erik30 Posted June 29, 2017 Posted June 29, 2017 (edited) Stop hanging out with her. You can't let go because you're seeing her all the time. Dude she even went on a date with some guy, and straight up told you you two will never be together. You're waisting your time and money, she obviously doesn't care. Just end it before she finds someone else before she leaves, (which she seems to be trying to do) and suddenly starts to ignore your texts and calls... Edited June 29, 2017 by Erik30 1
scooby-philly Posted July 2, 2017 Posted July 2, 2017 Listen OP, That's a tough situation to be in. No contact is the rule on here. Block on FB, other social media platforms and change your cell number. Seriously. It takes less then 5 minutes to change a number online now if you have one of the major carriers. And if you have a smart phone you can simply port all of your contacts over. Delete her contact and delete any evidence of calls or text between her and you so you're not tempted to message her. And...if you find yourself wanting to contact her, then go to a friend have them do it, and have them change your social media passwords and then suspend the accounts (not delete them) for 3-4 weeks. (Just tell close friends and family why so there's no alarm and people know they'll have to call/text you to get a hold of you (on that new number )
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