I don't know how in the world I'm ever going to meet someone

[XplorationofSpace]

I'm a 29 year old guy who everybody thinks that I have women falling over me left and right and it's far from the truth. I'm a pretty good looking dude, very heavily into physical fitness and fashion, I'm extraordinarily successful (solid six figures) but I'm also very big into family, I love kids, I come from a great family, I have great friends, I am extremely loyal, affectionate, easy going, etc... I think I'm a good combination of superficial and character traits that people say is important. I have received plenty of female attention throughout the years but it's never anybody even remotely close to who I can see myself dating.

 

My problem is a bunch of different areas - first thing I want a woman who is similar to myself - which means the following

 

- at least somewhat attractive, into fitness

- very loyal/nice

- classy/well spoken/at least somewhat intelligent

- no kids/close to my age (22-31). I want kids in about 4-6 years so I would really need to date no older than 25-28 in a perfect world

- either a decent job or even a mediocre job but responsible with finances. I'm extremely responsible with finances. My house will be paid for in 6 years. My car is already paid for. I can't date somebody who has huge debt and lives penny to penny. I don't need somebody anywhere near as successful as me but I don't want somebody who is a bum or a gold digger either.

 

This combination seems to be somewhat difficult to find. A lot of attractive women are stupid or shallow. A lot of super sweet women are in terrible shape. When I do see somebody I feel that they could potentially fit what I want, I rarely see a natural path to approach and chat them up. I can't just randomly walk up to any woman... I need some kind of a natural reason to talk to them...just chatting to them to hit on them feels so awkward to me and I feel like I'm being a huge nuisance. I guess I don't feel like women want to meet somebody or want me to talk to them. I'll be honest - I can be defeatist at times and feel like I'm annoying a woman if I ask her out.

 

This brings me to another point. I like the suburbs - I live about 45 minutes from a huge city but I don't know if I would even enjoy dating somebody from the city. I like my house, my yard and my piece and quiet. I like my 10 minute drive to work and 5 minute drive to my friends and parents. I like not having to pay for parking and yes I'm somewhat cheap, I like having my own house and being able to save a lot of money. Most cute, single, professional women live in the city. Don't get me wrong, I love partying in the city 3-4 times a month but dating somebody down there? Having to constantly drive down there and deal with the the traffic and parking and all the city nonsense? Would I really be a decent fit with somebody living down there?

 

I don't know what the hell to do. I'm sure I could find what I want in online dating but let's be honest here, women of that quality online are receiving an absolutely unfathomable amount of messages a day. I'm sure I have no real chance unless I become a famous male model or a professional athlete or something. How the hell am I going to separate myself from 50,000 men hitting on 1 women (or whatever stupid number you wanna use)???

 

This is starting to really frustrate and almost depress me. The years keep rolling by and rolling by and rolling by and I want to meet somebody so badly, I can't even tell you. This is driving me absolutely insane. Just FYI, I do NOT stay in the house - I go to concerts, festivals, social gatherings, sports events, bars, clubs, restaurants. I get out of my house as much as humanly possible but that's overrated IMO. It's very hard to approach women at most gatherings as they are all there with their social group and you look like an idiot approaching a woman there with 8 of her friends (with absolutely no clue if any of the men are her boyfriend). Most men meet their wife through natural means (IE through friends, work, school) because cold approaching at a random festival or charity event or whatever is VERY difficult. Of course, I don't ever meet anybody I could even remotely consider dating in my daily routine.

[sour_pikle]

I'm a 29 year old guy who everybody thinks that I have women falling over me left and right and it's far from the truth. I'm a pretty good looking dude, very heavily into physical fitness and fashion, I'm extraordinarily successful (solid six figures) but I'm also very big into family, I love kids, I come from a great family, I have great friends, I am extremely loyal, affectionate, easy going, etc... I think I'm a good combination of superficial and character traits that people say is important. I have received plenty of female attention throughout the years but it's never anybody even remotely close to who I can see myself dating.

 

My problem is a bunch of different areas - first thing I want a woman who is similar to myself - which means the following

 

- at least somewhat attractive, into fitness

- very loyal/nice

- classy/well spoken/at least somewhat intelligent

- no kids/close to my age (22-31). I want kids in about 4-6 years so I would really need to date no older than 25-28 in a perfect world

- either a decent job or even a mediocre job but responsible with finances. I'm extremely responsible with finances. My house will be paid for in 6 years. My car is already paid for. I can't date somebody who has huge debt and lives penny to penny. I don't need somebody anywhere near as successful as me but I don't want somebody who is a bum or a gold digger either.

 

This combination seems to be somewhat difficult to find. A lot of attractive women are stupid or shallow. A lot of super sweet women are in terrible shape. When I do see somebody I feel that they could potentially fit what I want, I rarely see a natural path to approach and chat them up. I can't just randomly walk up to any woman... I need some kind of a natural reason to talk to them...just chatting to them to hit on them feels so awkward to me and I feel like I'm being a huge nuisance. I guess I don't feel like women want to meet somebody or want me to talk to them. I'll be honest - I can be defeatist at times and feel like I'm annoying a woman if I ask her out.

 

This brings me to another point. I like the suburbs - I live about 45 minutes from a huge city but I don't know if I would even enjoy dating somebody from the city. I like my house, my yard and my piece and quiet. I like my 10 minute drive to work and 5 minute drive to my friends and parents. I like not having to pay for parking and yes I'm somewhat cheap, I like having my own house and being able to save a lot of money. Most cute, single, professional women live in the city. Don't get me wrong, I love partying in the city 3-4 times a month but dating somebody down there? Having to constantly drive down there and deal with the the traffic and parking and all the city nonsense? Would I really be a decent fit with somebody living down there?

 

I don't know what the hell to do. I'm sure I could find what I want in online dating but let's be honest here, women of that quality online are receiving an absolutely unfathomable amount of messages a day. I'm sure I have no real chance unless I become a famous male model or a professional athlete or something. How the hell am I going to separate myself from 50,000 men hitting on 1 women (or whatever stupid number you wanna use)???

 

This is starting to really frustrate and almost depress me. The years keep rolling by and rolling by and rolling by and I want to meet somebody so badly, I can't even tell you. This is driving me absolutely insane. Just FYI, I do NOT stay in the house - I go to concerts, festivals, social gatherings, sports events, bars, clubs, restaurants. I get out of my house as much as humanly possible but that's overrated IMO. It's very hard to approach women at most gatherings as they are all there with their social group and you look like an idiot approaching a woman there with 8 of her friends (with absolutely no clue if any of the men are her boyfriend). Most men meet their wife through natural means (IE through friends, work, school) because cold approaching at a random festival or charity event or whatever is VERY difficult. Of course, I don't ever meet anybody I could even remotely consider dating in my daily routine.

 

^ First World problems

[XplorationofSpace]

^ First World problems

 

 

its hilarious you say that. I was born in a third world country in Eastern Europe but I can't even go back and get wife back there because I get detained in military draft.

[Popsicle]

The path of least resistance for you is going to be to get on OLD. And yes send messages. There may be less men of your equal quality than you think.

[XplorationofSpace]

The path of least resistance for you is going to be to get on OLD. And yes send messages. There may be less men of your equal quality than you think.

 

 

what im looking for (mid to late 20s, cute, in nice shape, no kids, classy) online is looking for a movie star or professional athlete. I don't blame them - I would be same way if I received 50,000 messages a day