Blast from the past

[geminni]

Hello,

 

I haven’t been here for a while, but I guess now is that time again when I would appreciate a lot your opinion.

 

Long story short:

1. boy meets a girl

2. boy and girl go o a few dates

3. they become a couple

4. he is 23 she is 17

5. they go out for a year

6. they break up

7. they don’t have contact for 10+ years

8. After 10+ years they find each other on FB ( or one finds another )

9. Limited contact

10. They ran into each other 1.5 year ago, good vibe, all good,

 

Here comes June 2017 and our paths cross again. She needed some contact info from my field of work so I did her a favour and helped her out. We start talking again and arrange to meet.

We went out, had a few drinks, talked, laughed, good vibes, no pressure. It was really nice seeing her, she still looks awesome and is currently single. So am I.

 

As far as background goes, I did have a few relationships, haven’t thought about her for years, but when I come to think of it, she is the one that I met at the wrong time ( her being a teenager and we all know what we were like as teenagers ).

 

So, after a meet up, I told her that this was really fun and it was great seeing her and that we should do this again, She agreed and we parted ways.

 

Now, we have been texting a few times, but when you are in your 30s things are different than they were when we were first together obviously, so I am not trying to come on hard and be all intrusive.

So after a few days I texted her how the event, that she was organising, went and then I told her that when she has some free time we should definitely repeat our previous meet-up over drinks, since it is hot summer here and refreshment is very welcome.

She agreed.

But we did not set exact date.

 

So I guess now I should wait for her to initiate it, since I do not want to come off as intrusive ( here is that word again ). But how long, Because I certainly don’t want to wait forever

 

The thing is, I am overthinking what I do or say post meet-up, I just don’t want to f*** it up. Yes, I am eager and sometimes I can come off as too aggressive and I certainly do not want to do that.

[preraph]

Don't wait for her. Ask her out next Wednesday for a day on the weekend.

[act00]

I don't think you should wait. Call her and ask her out for the weekend.

[Gaeta]

But we did not set exact date.

Correction, YOU did not set an exact date. You brought up getting together it was up to you to offer a date.

 

So I guess now I should wait for her to initiate it, since I do not want to come off as intrusive ( here is that word again ). But how long, Because I certainly don’t want to wait forever

Your job to initiate a new date

 

The thing is, I am overthinking what I do or say post meet-up, I just don’t want to f*** it up. Yes, I am eager and sometimes I can come off as too aggressive and I certainly do not want to do that.

Be yourself, if it works good, if it's not meant to be then don't force it.

[mortensorchid]

SET UP A DATE ASAP as to when you will see her again. Otherwise she will think that you're not that into her and you will go poof. If you like her and want to be with her again, MAKE INTENTION TO DO SO KNOWN.

[geminni]

Thanks for the replies, just to put a timeline out:

- we first met last Thursday, after we finally agreed on a day that works for both of us, since we have different working schedules + other activities.

 

- On Monday I texted her about the event ( which was Saturday )

- On Tuesday was my last proposal that I have sent.

 

So since I put the ball in her court, I am in a little doubt that it will come off as too aggressive if I don't wait at least a little longer ( few days ) if I decide to ask her out myself.

Don't want to be too pushy.

 

I mean, I did show interest since I suggested to repeat the first one, didn't I?

[geminni]

Update:

 

I asked her out today for this weekend, but she said that she is occupied. I thought she would be, since it was short notice I can understand. So I told her next week then and she agreed, but we haven't set the day yet. We'll see. I will probably get in touch Tuesday or something.

 

I don't know , maybe I am overthinking, but I am getting a feeling that this is not so promising situation.

[SevenCity]

Update:

 

I asked her out today for this weekend, but she said that she is occupied. I thought she would be, since it was short notice I can understand. So I told her next week then and she agreed, but we haven't set the day yet. We'll see. I will probably get in touch Tuesday or something.

 

I don't know , maybe I am overthinking, but I am getting a feeling that this is not so promising situation.

 

Set up a DEFINITE date. Not "maybe", not "sometime", not "we should".

 

Ask her when she is free and set a date / time / place. That will keep you out of this limbo you keep putting yourself into.

 

Asking her when she is free will forgo her being busy (if she wants to see you). I don't ask for a specific day anymore - I ask when they are free and then set the date (assuming my schedule works).

[geminni]

Set up a DEFINITE date. Not "maybe", not "sometime", not "we should".

 

Ask her when she is free and set a date / time / place. That will keep you out of this limbo you keep putting yourself into.

 

Asking her when she is free will forgo her being busy (if she wants to see you). I don't ask for a specific day anymore - I ask when they are free and then set the date (assuming my schedule works).

 

That's a good way to do it, I agree. Will do that, I am already getting sick of all this limbo mambo

[smackie9]

She's dodging......if she was reeeeeeally interested she would have made a quick and firm suggestion to meet. Sorry but just because you two were into each other years ago, doesn't mean they still are. I know I never was when I ran into an old flame. People change.