the_lost_1 Posted June 15, 2017 Posted June 15, 2017 Hi so I don't know if that's normal or not but being 29 myself I've never gotten a date. I guess I've been through a lot and everything, I guess I kinda still am. I fell in love with this girl but she doesn't feel the same way back, so...next chapter I guess maybe (i made thread about her earlier). Anyway it's mostly because of communication issues that causes confidence issues but yea i'm hard of hearing so I'll probably never date.
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 15, 2017 Author Posted June 15, 2017 People sometimes would also tell me that I'm hard on myself but idk anymore.
Ami1uwant Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 being 29 and not even dating much is not normal. Have you had any female friends in your life?
Bastile Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 That can likely be put down to a lack of effort. How many girls have you asked out in 2017? (not talking about online dating, face to face). Start there.
Miss Peach Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 How are you with just general social interaction OP?
No_Go Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 I never dated until I was 27-28. Literally not even a single date. Then a very pushy guy started dating me, and in few years I had other dates, 3 relationships etc. No worries, you're not that old. Just find someone extroverted that wants to date you and go from there. Hi so I don't know if that's normal or not but being 29 myself I've never gotten a date. I guess I've been through a lot and everything, I guess I kinda still am. I fell in love with this girl but she doesn't feel the same way back, so...next chapter I guess maybe (i made thread about her earlier). Anyway it's mostly because of communication issues that causes confidence issues but yea i'm hard of hearing so I'll probably never date.
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 16, 2017 Author Posted June 16, 2017 I guess that my love life is pretty much nonexistent and it does hurt to be that way....in fact I'm still hurting from the girl that rejected me
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 16, 2017 Author Posted June 16, 2017 being 29 and not even dating much is not normal. Have you had any female friends in your life? yeah i have female friends but i don't think they like me much
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 16, 2017 Author Posted June 16, 2017 That can likely be put down to a lack of effort. How many girls have you asked out in 2017? (not talking about online dating, face to face). Start there. You're probably right about lack of effort, I also have shyness and trust issues so....I'm not very good at asking out
preraph Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 Do you have a circle of friends? If you do, then it's likely you can also date because you're social enough to. If not, you should probably be just working on finding friends and expanding your network. Since you have a disability, what I suggested on another of your posts is that you tap into that community where you would be more easily accepted for who you are.
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 16, 2017 Author Posted June 16, 2017 I don't think I can make anyone laugh, I honestly think I'm losing my sense of humour as I age and I've always been strict about myself and my actions, my wishes as well. I don't know how to explain.
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 16, 2017 Author Posted June 16, 2017 Do you have a circle of friends? If you do, then it's likely you can also date because you're social enough to. If not, you should probably be just working on finding friends and expanding your network. Since you have a disability, what I suggested on another of your posts is that you tap into that community where you would be more easily accepted for who you are. Yeah but I mean I'm still trying to speak smoothly, try to listen better and everything. it's just hard. You know what I'm saying? Like, when I lost my hearing it affected my speaking ability and everything. Basically that's what I think puts girls off, you know like since I got accent and all that.
BaileyB Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 People who are deaf and hard of hearing date and get married. You must get over the rejection - rejection is a part of dating and a part of life. And dating, life life, is what you make of it. If you don't put much effort into anything, you can't really expect anything in return. I would suggest that you find a counsellor to work on your self esteem issues and your confidence in social situations. Good luck to you.
BaileyB Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 Lots of people who are hard of hearing date and get married. I understand that you are self conscious and you find it difficult, but don't assume that your disability will limit your ability to have a relationship with a woman. You must get over the rejection you felt from the girl you liked - rejection is a part of dating and a part of life. Everyone has to learn to deal with it and get on with things... And dating, life life, is what you make of it. If you don't put much effort into anything, you can't really expect anything in return. I would suggest that you find a counsellor to work on your self esteem issues and your confidence in social situations. Good luck to you.
smackie9 Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 You can be blind, deaf or even dumb....as long as you are confident you will get dates. I suggest you take an assertive training course and a public speaking course. maybe challenge yourself and go get training on indoor rock climbing. Step outside of your comfort zone.
Shanex Posted June 16, 2017 Posted June 16, 2017 I've been rejected enough in real life until very recently to grow a thicker skin. It doesn't hurt anymore, if I get a text ''meh there was no spark'' I laugh to myself and move on. Hoping you'll feel better. Mind you, I was rejected if not laughed at as a teen by bullies and 'popular' ladies then dated like crazy in my 20s. The wind of change may come later to you.
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 16, 2017 Author Posted June 16, 2017 I was told that men age like a fine wine so I don't know maybe I have to hang in there lol. Thanks guys.
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 17, 2017 Author Posted June 17, 2017 I think the problem is that I'm not flirty enough. I grew up with difficulties so that's why...
preraph Posted June 17, 2017 Posted June 17, 2017 You said in another thread you only met this girl once at a club and only have known her two weeks on social media. This is not "love." This is a guy asking out a stranger he saw at a club and getting rejected by a girl he knows nothing about.
Bastile Posted June 17, 2017 Posted June 17, 2017 (edited) You're probably right about lack of effort, I also have shyness and trust issues so....I'm not very good at asking out Getting really upset over one rejection means you haven't been rejected nowhere near enough. Go and get your face slapped You need to feel comfortable imposing on a woman, and then you need to enjoy being social. Not sure about your particular hearing problem, but everyone's got insecurities. Part of the challenge. You need to figure out how to work around it. Are there any groups for that sort of issue which you can join? That's an easy in. Edited June 17, 2017 by Bastile
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 17, 2017 Author Posted June 17, 2017 You said in another thread you only met this girl once at a club and only have known her two weeks on social media. This is not "love." This is a guy asking out a stranger he saw at a club and getting rejected by a girl he knows nothing about. No, no, no, we did meet again and hang out and we are good friends. @Bastile, you are funny! Yes it was my first time liking someone in a really long time. Maybe I just need to get out more and meet more new people. Thank you. BTW I am also seeking a mentor for self improvement that specializes in hard of hearing individuals. Thanks again.
Author the_lost_1 Posted June 17, 2017 Author Posted June 17, 2017 Funny part is that when I was in club I was standing there like a security guard with palms wrapped at front while everyone was dancing, just nodding my head to music lol
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