RustCohle Posted June 12, 2017 Posted June 12, 2017 You mean with the men lol, some yes within a few weeks....but the ones that were lukewarm/nervous or waited days later, 0. Dating is a hit or his. Some like bold contact and strong intent, while some want to take their time and have some space. You just play it by ear....do what feels right for you. Oh my mistake thought a man was doing the comment. Ah I guess as a woman you are all right with that.
The Urbanyst Posted June 12, 2017 Posted June 12, 2017 Take this from a guy who gets laid a lot.. what women say with their WORDS usually mans absolutely nothing. Women are rarely direct and honest about anything.. especially in dating. Confidence really is the key. I always assume a girl wants me unless she shows very obvious signs she doesn't. Even flaking on dates and ignoring calls/text are not guarantees she isn't into you. I've had girls do this to me and I still slept with them eventually. Here is what works for me: Just focus on making them feel good. Flirt with them and touch them a lot. NEVER put any pressure on a girl to do anything. Let he make her own decisions. Go in for kisses and sex if you want it. Just go for what you want. The girl will either let you have it or she will stop you. If she stops you, back off and try again later. If she becomes rude or disrespectful, then drop her. Otherwise, keep going until you get what you want. But remember NO PRESSURE on her. If she flakes, say ok. If she rejects your kiss/sex, just shrug it off and keep being flirty with her. Being persistent without putting pressure on the girl is the closest thing to a magic bullet I've found. I've gotten laid a lot this way.
RustCohle Posted June 12, 2017 Posted June 12, 2017 There is no one approach fits all or "lethal mistake". I approach each date and communicate based on the girl, how the date went, and just gut feeling. Some girls see that as confident, while others MIGHT see it as needy. A good guy can sense which approach to take for each individual date. Really? Ok then keep on doing what you do and stop wondering with ifs then. A woman might have high interest in you from the 1st date, but telling her on the spot that you should be doing this again lowers your odds and her attraction to you, even a little. Even if you get the second date, even if you have sex with her. A woman that is a maybe will turn into a no. You want to pedestal women or you want them to crave you? And as someone else pointed out, set the 2nd date and stop wondering. But I can easily see where this is going. She is going to either drag you from the nose for months or it will end up nowhere.
RustCohle Posted June 12, 2017 Posted June 12, 2017 Dating is a hit or his. Some like bold contact and strong intent, while some want to take their time and have some space. You are right about the dating but not entirely. A man who knows what he is doing can turn a maybe into a yes. A man who doesn't know what he is doing can turn a yes into a no. The advice is for increasing your odds. If a man wants to emulate whatever he sees on TV, thinking it is for the best, then by all means he can go on about it this way.
smackie9 Posted June 12, 2017 Posted June 12, 2017 I was talking about how some women respond better to bold and confident, while others are more reserved no matter what you do. It's a matter of gauging their response. Some guys have trouble reading a woman's body language because their mind is over analyzing, making them flustered. And of course experience can be a key factor as well we all know that.
RustCohle Posted June 12, 2017 Posted June 12, 2017 (edited) Well it's more complicated than that and I can't explain it easily. But you are not correct in your assumption. Here is what I mean: 1) A woman might not like you from the get go and whatever you do will not change her mind. 2) A woman might be all over you from the get go BUT you have to still pull SOME correct moves to take her to bed(and subsequently to a relationship. I don't mean that in the one night stand context). 3) A woman is unsure about you. You have to convince her. This is the tricky part. SOME correct moves are not enough. You have to do MANY correct moves to take her to bed. If you do some and most moves wrong, you might lay her but you'll be her puppy in the relationship. There are ways to confirm in which situation the woman is. Also if I am confident, I will not be a pathetic little guy all of a sudden because the woman in front of me doesn't like confident guys. She simply doesn't like me from the get go and we both move on. Playing around and changing faces in dating as it suits the woman in front of you, shows to her later on that you are not genuine. Women see though you eventually and don't respect that. A man should pick a frame and stick to it. Edited June 12, 2017 by RustCohle
Redhead14 Posted June 12, 2017 Posted June 12, 2017 So I had a first date with a girl and told her we should go out again as we were leaving. She said sure or something of the sort. I was wondering if that means anything because would girls say yes even if they weren't interested just to be polite? If at the end of a first date, second date, you are sure you want another, you ask her then and you do it with specifics -- xday, xplace, xtime. Since you didn't do that then, you call her within a day or two tops and ask her out again.
starrynight4321 Posted June 12, 2017 Posted June 12, 2017 There is no one approach fits all or "lethal mistake". I approach each date and communicate based on the girl, how the date went, and just gut feeling. Some girls see that as confident, while others MIGHT see it as needy. A good guy can sense which approach to take for each individual date. Completely agree with this. Saying women will see you as weak is just completely WRONG. A woman who is interested will be excited that you're showing you're eager. Period. Every time. A woman who is on the fence or not into you will see it as negative and needy. The reaction comes mostly from the feeling/chemistry etc, how well the date went. If you had a great date, she isn't going to run for the hills because you asked for a second date at the end of the first one. That's just pure nonsense. People tend to ignore this fact- when we like someone, we tend to see their actions as more positive even if we'd dislike it from someone we were less into. Both men and women do this. Anyone who says otherwise doesn't know what they're talking about.
Author henderson14 Posted June 12, 2017 Author Posted June 12, 2017 (edited) Well it's more complicated than that and I can't explain it easily. But you are not correct in your assumption. Here is what I mean: 1) A woman might not like you from the get go and whatever you do will not change her mind. 2) A woman might be all over you from the get go BUT you have to still pull SOME correct moves to take her to bed(and subsequently to a relationship. I don't mean that in the one night stand context). 3) A woman is unsure about you. You have to convince her. This is the tricky part. SOME correct moves are not enough. You have to do MANY correct moves to take her to bed. If you do some and most moves wrong, you might lay her but you'll be her puppy in the relationship. There are ways to confirm in which situation the woman is. Also if I am confident, I will not be a pathetic little guy all of a sudden because the woman in front of me doesn't like confident guys. She simply doesn't like me from the get go and we both move on. Playing around and changing faces in dating as it suits the woman in front of you, shows to her later on that you are not genuine. Women see though you eventually and don't respect that. A man should pick a frame and stick to it. You are taking things waayy out of context and exaggerations to the extreme. Confidence will come across throughout the preceding date. Asking her out when saying good by or not asking her out will have no bearing on you being perceived as "a pathetic little guy" or "changing faces." And stop saying "take her to bed" or"lay her" like you're some player or pimp. It just sounds stupid. Edited June 12, 2017 by henderson14 2
RustCohle Posted June 13, 2017 Posted June 13, 2017 (edited) Player/pimp has nothing to with what I'm saying. You have no gf if you didn't have sex. This is the fact that most of you forget. 2nd, 3rd, 10th date without having sex at the end of the day and feel you have success because you went dates with her you are like the biggest loser out there. And yes it will have bearing. As I've said you can keep on doing what you do and going on dates for years without getting any. No problem with me. starrynight are you a woman? If you are I rest my case. A woman is excited that you are eager because she gets validation and attention. But in an attraction level she is not excited. Learn the difference. Edited June 13, 2017 by RustCohle
Author henderson14 Posted June 13, 2017 Author Posted June 13, 2017 Player/pimp has nothing to with what I'm saying. You have no gf if you didn't have sex. This is the fact that most of you forget. 2nd, 3rd, 10th date without having sex at the end of the day and feel you have success because you went dates with her you are like the biggest loser out there. And yes it will have bearing. As I've said you can keep on doing what you do and going on dates for years without getting any. No problem with me. starrynight are you a woman? If you are I rest my case. A woman is excited that you are eager because she gets validation and attention. But in an attraction level she is not excited. Learn the difference. Great. I didn't know we were even debating having sex and BF/GF status. That wasn't the topic of my thread. I always have sex well before I even have that exclusive status anyways.
mortensorchid Posted June 14, 2017 Posted June 14, 2017 If you like her, contact her immediately (phone call preferably but a text is also alright) asking to see her again. If she responds with a yes, then you know. If she never responds, it's done.
Author henderson14 Posted June 14, 2017 Author Posted June 14, 2017 Its done. We're going out again and she seems excited. I just wanted some insight before I actually got a response from her. 2
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