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Posted

What does it mean if she tells me that she is very calm for me?

Posted

What was the context? It could mean, "I'm good for you....you need someone to balance out your energy." OR it could mean "You're too hyper for me."

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Posted
What was the context? It could mean, "I'm good for you....you need someone to balance out your energy." OR it could mean "You're too hyper for me."

 

Before she said that she told me that I'm a good and nice person but I need an other woman. And then said "I am very calm for you".

Mind you English isn't her first language.

Posted

It means friend zoned buddy.

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Posted
It means friend zoned buddy.

 

Could it be because she didn't find me attractive enough? And can I get out of it?

Posted
Could it be because she didn't find me attractive enough? And can I get out of it?

 

Nothing about that statement is about your physical attractiveness. Sounds like she doesn't like your personality.

Posted
Could it be because she didn't find me attractive enough? And can I get out of it?

 

Her comment was weird. She could have meant you are a calming influence on her ....if she is someone who usually feels high stress and anxiety and notices that doesn't appear while with you.

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Posted
Her comment was weird. She could have meant you are a calming influence on her ....if she is someone who usually feels high stress and anxiety and notices that doesn't appear while with you.

 

No, she said I needed another woman...

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Posted
Nothing about that statement is about your physical attractiveness. Sounds like she doesn't like your personality.

 

She said I was a good a nice person. Didn't you read that?

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She said I was a good a nice person. Didn't you read that?

 

I'm sure you are a good person, but you can think someone is a good person and still not gel with their personality.

 

What do YOU think she meant? What do you hope she meant?

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What do YOU think she meant? What do you hope she meant?

 

I think personally she ment that I was unable to give her butterflys! Not able to make her excited. I understand it that way :(:(:(:(

Posted

It means she's an introvert who likes to do quiet things. She's probably reading you as not being that way.

 

Whatever it is, she's telling you she doesn't think you two are compatible.

 

Onward my friend!

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Posted

Well like you said there's clearly a language barrier here. I am fairly comfident she was trying to say "I am too calm for you." As in, someting about your personality doesn't do it for her and she feels that she is too calm to be with you. This doesn't mean you're ugly, and it doesn't mean that she doesn't think you're a nice person. She just thinks your personalities don't mesh.

 

Are you very energetic, outgoing, loud, social, etc? Are you really active? Do you talk/move faster? Do you have a strong dominant personality? This doesn't have anything to do with your appearance. Is she more of a homebody while you like to go out? It seems like a personality thing

 

Also, I know this is not what you want to hear but I wouldn't try to change it. You haven't given much information but it doesn't seem you're doing anything wrong- you're just incompatible. You are who you are and the right girl isn't going to be bothered by it. If you try to be someone you're not, you're just delaying the inevitable break up later.

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Posted

Are interpersonal communication skills really this bad out there? Threads such as these, which we see too often, make me wonder.

 

OP, you realize how silly it is to be asking us to guess the meaning of, out of context, the words of a complete stranger whom we know nothing else about. Can't you just ask her yourself? You'd likely get a much more accurate answer.

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Posted

If that's by text, make sure it was not auto-correct.

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If that's by text, make sure it was not auto-correct.

 

Good point! We certainly wouldn't want OP to be trying to figure out "I'm calm for you" when she meant "I'm HOT for you!" :)

Posted

It depends on the tone and how she said it. I would have asked her to clarify right after she said it. I dated a girl who told he I was very calm compared to her and she liked it because if both of us were as emotional and energetic as her it would probably be too much. We balanced each other out.

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Posted
It depends on the tone and how she said it. I would have asked her to clarify right after she said it. I dated a girl who told he I was very calm compared to her and she liked it because if both of us were as emotional and energetic as her it would probably be too much. We balanced each other out.

 

Now it makes sense to me! She said some other time that I am emotional and according to her a emotional person needs someone emotional too so that they can relate to each other. I didn't agree on that.

Posted

Shes trying to give excuses so that you won't ask her out again.

 

Turn it around? Start ignoring her, be emotionally unavailable to her, talk to other girls, let her see you with other girls.

Posted
She said I was a good a nice person. Didn't you read that?

 

All my friends are nice people. However, this isn't enough to make me attracted to them.

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Posted

Turn it around? Start ignoring her, be emotionally unavailable to her, talk to other girls, let her see you with other girls.

 

And what will that achieve? She might reconsider being with me is a good thing then?

Posted

It means she is not excited about you or attracted to you. No way to change that.

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Now it makes sense to me! She said some other time that I am emotional and according to her a emotional person needs someone emotional too so that they can relate to each other. I didn't agree on that.

 

Two emotional people equals disaster IMO. I understood my emotional girlfriend at the time better than she did. We related just fine. She's probably just not into you.

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she feels no chemistry ..no spark.....deb

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And what will that achieve? She might reconsider being with me is a good thing then?

I don't know this woman...I don't know what is going through her mind either.....BUT in some cases they are on the fence about how they feel about you. If you are all over them, trying to do everything for them, being around them all the time, etc...it's a turn off. That isn't being masculine, that's you being a pu$$y. Women look at how a man carries himself...being self confident, not one to make a fuss over a girl, has other things going on, plays sports, has a lot of buddies, a strong social circle, can dress himself trendy (the shoes tells all), can socialize, have a good sense of humor, make people feel comfortable around him, a little cocky but not arrogant, able to talk to the ladies, etc. You got that going on, that means you got game.

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