JS17 Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 I feel like everyone I know has cheated on a significant other at some point. Sometimes I feel likeI'm the only one who hasn't. Am I alone?
AndrewJ Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 You are not alone js17. not in my biological make up , u r who u r.
SoftDrink Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 i think out of all the people i know, there is one person who has not cheated. everyone else has in some way. weird. and very sad.
Woggle Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Most people cheat which is sad. People don't even know what the meaning of love and commitment is these days. I have decided to adapt to the way things are these days. It seems like everybody else is a player so might as well play the game as well and get mine. It sucks because deep down I really wish to have a long lasting and loving relationship but I don't see it happening. It is no use having morals in an immoral world. perhaps if I ever meet a woman who feels the same as me I will change my mind.
SoftDrink Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by Woggle Most people cheat which is sad. People don't even know what the meaning of love and commitment is these days. I have decided to adapt to the way things are these days. It seems like everybody else is a player so might as well play the game as well and get mine. It sucks because deep down I really wish to have a long lasting and loving relationship but I don't see it happening. It is no use having morals in an immoral world. perhaps if I ever meet a woman who feels the same as me I will change my mind. wow. bitter. good luck.
A Fly onThe Wall Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 No your not alone.. I've never cheated.. emotionally or physically
A Fly onThe Wall Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by Woggle People don't even know what the meaning of love and commitment is these days. and YOU do ??? How can you love another thru all the bitterness towards others ??
ReluctantRomeo Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 I've never cheated. It's just not in my nature. I would say that a majority of the guys and girls around me don't and wouldn't cheat. But yes, there are plenty of cheaters out there, JS17.
Woggle Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by A Fly onThe Wall and YOU do ??? How can you love another thru all the bitterness towards others ?? Trying to be a good man is why I got burnt and that is what made me the bitter man I am today. I wasn't always like this.
SoftDrink Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by A Fly onThe Wall and YOU do ??? How can you love another thru all the bitterness towards others ?? yeah, that's kind of what i was getting at too, fly.
Author JS17 Posted August 4, 2005 Author Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by Woggle Trying to be a good man is why I got burnt and that is what made me the bitter man I am today. I wasn't always like this. It's probably just a phase. He'll either grow out of it with time or burn someone badly who doesn't deserve it and then grow out of it. We've all been bitter at one time in our lives. On topic, one of my best female friends who has always been the stable one for all of us cheated on her boyfriend of 3 years. My ex bf cheated on me about half a year ago. It's hard not to judge in this situation but how can we be so wrong about the people closest to us?
MySugaree Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 If "everyone" does cheat, as you believe, then we must ask ourselves why cheating is in our genes and in that of many other species. From an evolutionary, not ethical, perspective,cheating must have an adaptive function. People cheat for as many reasons as they fall in love. While it may make the more virtuous among us to feel good about themselves when railing against "cheaters," to lump everyone who falls in love with someone else a "cheater", while partnered with someone else, sheds more heat than light on this fascinating and enduring species trait.
ReluctantRomeo Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by MySugaree this fascinating and enduring species trait. It'll be an endangered species if I catch a Juliet cheating...
Author JS17 Posted August 4, 2005 Author Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by MySugaree If "everyone" does cheat, as you believe, then we must ask ourselves why cheating is in our genes and in that of many other species. From an evolutionary, not ethical, perspective,cheating must have an adaptive function. People cheat for as many reasons as they fall in love. While it may make the more virtuous among us to feel good about themselves when railing against "cheaters," to lump everyone who falls in love with someone else a "cheater", while partnered with someone else, sheds more heat than light on this fascinating and enduring species trait. I am not "railing" against "cheaters". Take a chill pill.
d'Arthez Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by JS17 On topic, one of my best female friends who has always been the stable one for all of us cheated on her boyfriend of 3 years. My ex bf cheated on me about half a year ago. It's hard not to judge in this situation but how can we be so wrong about the people closest to us? Lack of insight in the other person. There is a marked difference between what we believe to be true, and what is true. Add to that that we have some tendencies to think of our SO as morally perfect, or at least good, we often have problems discerning their true characters. Stability is a balancing act, until you fall in one direction or the other. Harmony is what you should be looking out for. And of course consider irresponsible behavior. Getting drunk every night, or every week in clubs does not improve the chances of being faithful. Originally posted by MySugaree If "everyone" does cheat, as you believe, then we must ask ourselves why cheating is in our genes and in that of many other species. From an evolutionary, not ethical, perspective,cheating must have an adaptive function. "Every kid" goes to school. It does not mean that going to school is genetically programmed. The same with cheating. There are a lot of factors to consider. It may serve an evolutionary purpose though, but if we are considering the negative effects experienced by most betrayed people, you would also have to ask the question, if the behavior is beneficial at all. It should also imply that cheating without using any form of birth-control is the more attractive option in general.
Teag Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 I have only cheated once, but that was only b/c I found out my boyfriend at the time was cheating on me. We ended up breaking up the next day anyway and I am now married to the man I cheated with (it was only kissing no sex) Other than that one time I've never cheated, Most of the guys I know have cheated at one time or another but I know ALOT of females who have never cheated. Its mostly a guy thing here it seems, it seems anyway.
Opium Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 You're not alone. I can honestly say I have never cheated on any of my SO. I can't say I've never been tempted BUT I stand my ground and say with my head up high, I've never cheated.
DacaInaru Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 NOPE your not alone.. i'm 35 and have never cheated on anyone i've had a relationship with.. doesn't mean that the temptation to wasn't there.. it was on occasions but I never acted on it..
DacaInaru Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 NOPE your not alone.. i'm 35 and have never cheated on anyone i've had a relationship with.. doesn't mean that the temptation to wasn't there.. it was on occasions but I never acted on it..
EnigmaXOXO Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 I've never cheated "on" anyone or "with" anyone. Not physically or emotionally. Never even a second thought. And while I have made many errors in judgement throughout my life, I'm actually proud to at least say that was never one of them. Then again, growing up around it and seeing it distroy the lives of family, colleagues and friends I've acquired an unpleasant distaste for that kind of conduct and drama. To me, its repulsive behavior and I would never become that which I dislike the most. So "no"... not everyone cheats.
scratch Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 What is emotional cheating? This seems to imply the same kind thing as "impure thoughts," in that to be above them would make one superhuman. On topic, I've cheated twice, both times to cover my bases in what I deemed to be doomed relationships.
Author JS17 Posted August 4, 2005 Author Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by scratch What is emotional cheating? This seems to imply the same kind thing as "impure thoughts," in that to be above them would make one superhuman. On topic, I've cheated twice, both times to cover my bases in what I deemed to be doomed relationships. emotional cheating is when you develop an emotional relationship with another person while you are involved with someone. why not just get out of the doomed relationship instead of cheating? cover your bases....cop out.
scratch Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Originally posted by JS17 emotional cheating is when you develop an emotional relationship with another person while you are involved with someone. why not just get out of the doomed relationship instead of cheating? cover your bases....cop out. What's an emotional relationship? Do you mean that if you're in a relationship, you cannot have contact with anyone with whom you'd be willing to date were you single? You misunderstand me, I did not intend to cop out. I intended to show that it was a premeditated and calculated decision, as opposed to a drunken moment of weakness, ploy for revenge or the like.
Author JS17 Posted August 4, 2005 Author Posted August 4, 2005 Being acquaintances or friends with someone that you would date if you are single is far different than developing an emotional romantic relationship. Yes, there is a fine line but you know if you've crossed it. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?threadid=68083
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