kss Posted June 6, 2017 Posted June 6, 2017 Hi, There is this girl I am interested in. She also interested; in fact she was the one which started flirting with me (she was all over me). We know each other by a mutual friend. We texted for a few days (started texting her after a while, I believe this could be a turn off for her to some extent) and then asked her to hang-out. She was a bit hostile on the onset (I was kind of confused), but then spend the evening chatting and going to some place to eat. She changed her temper. Asked her again if she is off-work in 5 days, I got an answer like "Nope I am back to my tight schedule. Won't be in ***' the city she is leaving'. She travels to neighboring cities for work. Does this imply - "No, I am not interested" from her side. Should I try again. One more note: This mutual friend of ours is a guy. (I have also a suspicion that he likes her, And I am a bit skeptical if he talks good stuff about me to her. He is her primary source of info about me. I didnt tell this guy when I was setting a time with her (I did this because he did nt seem to be supportive for our going together, I think he has feelings for her as I mentioned above). But I think she told him (I can see that from his face). Me and this mutual guy are in the same apartment. The girl lives in a neighboring city. How do you advise that I should interact with this guy? Thanks,
smackie9 Posted June 6, 2017 Posted June 6, 2017 She's blowin ya off.....her response says it all. If she was interested she would have politely told you she will be available at such and such a time, then suggested what she would like to do. She just told you she was busy, that is the signal for NO. as for the competition... doesn't matter what any of you two do, she likes who she likes regardless. 2
preraph Posted June 6, 2017 Posted June 6, 2017 I advise you don't interact with the guy except to be polite if you run into each other and certainly not talk about who you're dating. She might be making an excuse with the schedule or not. Ask her to something specific once you know she's in town, but only if she's occasionally texting you. 2
Author kss Posted June 7, 2017 Author Posted June 7, 2017 Thanks for the helpful messages. What could I possibly think of to initiate contact to reach her out and look for ways to convince her. ( Even though we are not texting each other in the meantime!
todreaminblue Posted June 7, 2017 Posted June 7, 2017 (edited) hey kss you stated above that you know she isnt into texting why not try standing out from the mob that texts and call her as in voice call her.....personally i prefer a guy to have soem guts to get on the phone to me..even better face me and ask....thats gutsy and courageous..........im not fond of texting myself so ambiguous....its alright in the beginning....i guess....but for me being older...i sort of expect old school guys who have guts and confidence.....it more or less determines who i date....and who i dont.... show some initiative most guys i have dated ...are really upfront they dont play the texting game...catches my interest.....because it is different and these guys stand out..... .have some confidence in your asking her on a date... over the phone......how you do it is pretty easy you dial her number and you ask her out ..no ambiguity ..say hey glad your back in town been thinking about you and i go on a date to this place i just found i know you will love it......are you interested?....i am hoping you know little about her to know her passions and interests so you can tailor a date to suit....be a man with a plan.. call her set it up...if she says no im busy say next weekend? if she says no and doesnt offer a date she isnt busy.........say ...ok such and such(her name).....when you arent so busy give me a bell and we will catch up..... .then wish her well and hang up...and move on...dont wait for her....and i wish you well......deb Edited June 7, 2017 by todreaminblue 1
Author kss Posted June 7, 2017 Author Posted June 7, 2017 Thanks todreaminblue for your thoughtful message.
Author kss Posted June 8, 2017 Author Posted June 8, 2017 smackie9 and preraph, thanks for your feedbacks. I am still puzzled, are you suggesting that I should contact her only if I get a positive attitude. I could have called her as deb suggested but I a bit not sure if I will get a "yes". What would you guys recommend so I can find ways I can elevate her excitement then ask her out. I mean what ways can I create to meet her and build a new atmosphere. I am still stranded! Thanks again
smackie9 Posted June 8, 2017 Posted June 8, 2017 I have a feeling she doesn't like pushy guys. Be cool, distant and aloof. Act like you don't have a care in the world. If you jump on her like a slobbering puppy texting her all the time and crap, she's gonna shove you off. Who knows maybe she changed her mind...maybe she's decided she's not that into you. It happens. You make yourself more desirable if you make yourself less available. Girls like a challenge. You can't force someone to like you. You have to play it kool.
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