Gaeta Posted June 7, 2017 Posted June 7, 2017 It sounds like Sunday is the only day he has to do his weekly chores. Would you be willing to offer to do his laundry or make his sandwiches in exchange for him staying longer? OMG D0nnivain: The man is home each day at 6 pm like millions of people each day! I get up at 6 am, I am back home at 6 pm each day and I can handle cooking, cleaning and laundry, the dog, the daughter, the boyfriend, the yard, and a million other things hitting my way.
d0nnivain Posted June 7, 2017 Posted June 7, 2017 Gaeta If course you are right but I'm trying to give Cloudy Head options of how she can get what she wants. It clearly is more important to her than him. In her situation I could most likely guilt the guy into doing what I want but I'd throw him a bone too. I worry when people see things as only black & white . . .if one partner doesn't do every single thing the other one wants, it's a disaster. There are oftentimes that I want DH to do something that he's not really thrilled about so I joke that I "bribe" him. He loves Guinness beer on tap so I'll say something like if you do this for me, I'll drive home & we can stop at ___ bar so you can have a pint. Giving a little to get something -- even if it would be better / nicer / more loving if the other person just did it out of the kindness of their heart -- is still a win, sometimes. 3
smackie9 Posted June 7, 2017 Posted June 7, 2017 Of course we all like to decompress and have our 'me time' but planning some 'me time' right in the middle of a 2 day family activity is fussing in my book! It's not like he's spending an entire week with them. She just wants to leave at noon instead of 8 am. He STILL has his 'me time' at 4 pm. He can take the rest of the week as 'me time' if he wishes. I get your point, everyone has their own expectations. In that department, I'm pretty easy going. If she feels he is being unreasonable, then maybe we have a compatibility issue here. 1
Author CloudyHead Posted June 7, 2017 Author Posted June 7, 2017 After pondering this issue more, and reading everyone's comments, I wish that I had not even made the effort to include him for the weekend trip at this point.
d0nnivain Posted June 7, 2017 Posted June 7, 2017 After pondering this issue more, and reading everyone's comments, I wish that I had not even made the effort to include him for the weekend trip at this point. So the issue becomes what now? Have you told him his time table doesn't work for you? (I may have missed that). What did he say? If you are seriously OK with him not going, tell him that & this is all fine. If you are annoyed that he's not going on your time table at least talk to him about it. You may change his mind but you can't hold in your anger. If you hold it in, it will eventually bubble over & you will explode. That's no good.
Author CloudyHead Posted June 17, 2017 Author Posted June 17, 2017 I did talk to boyfriend about the issue. We both felt the other one was being difficult on the issue (of course, I didn't think I was and still don't). Anyway, he agreed to stay until 12:00 noon so the issue is resolved. I appreciate the comments and responses!
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