Why does my Personal Trainer's Female Colleague Behave Rudely Towards Me?

[girlygo]

I decided to start a training programme with a personal trainer a couple of weeks back. Admittedly the guy is good looking (younger than me though) and, having spotted him when I initially went for a consultation there, I certainly perked up when he was allocated to me as my PT! Even so, I'm not one for flirting or going out with personal trainers and over the last couple of weeks, I've been making good progress with him for getting fit/strength gains. I am also friendly to the staff and him - he laughs at my occasional one-liners but our talking is always about the training/nutrition, rather than personal.

 

All of the other gym staff (men) are friendly and say 'hello' when I arrive and walk past reception. In the last week though I've started to notice that the one female personal trainer, never acknowledges, or even looks at me if she is there, and makes no effort to smile or say 'hi' when she's there. She always (strangely) looks at the floor or away, even when she is part of a group who all greet me. What's weirder and becoming increasingly unsettling is that when my trainer is taking me around the different machines to exercise, she always happens to then go on the one next to me with one of her clients and basically encroach on my space, even walking in front of me when she could go around me where there's more space. It got to the point where on one occasion, she purposely got her client to start lifting a barbell right next to where I was working out so I physically had to move. Even though it wasn't my fault, I said 'sorry, I'm in the way' and she literally ignored me.

 

When my trainer was talking to me for a few minutes, I could see her hovering in the background. 10 seconds later she rudely tapped him on the shoulder to break up our conversation to 'urgently' use the machine I was still on! The worst was when my PT had taken me into a separate room to take my measurements (with the door closed - it has no windows.) 2 minutes later there was a knock on the door and she burst in without waiting for a response and apologised, pretending she didn't know we were in there when she had seen us go in. My trainer told her he'd be 5 minutes, but then when we came out, she didn't even go into the room or need to speak to him.

 

Once, she was with another client and I could sense them both looking in our direction. I assumed they were just happening to be facing our direction but when my trainer suddenly stop and turn to look at her and ask if she was waiting to go on the equipment we were using, I realised that she was literally just standing looking at us both! She just jokingly said 'no, we're just watching you' and looked as both with a smile on her face, but I could tell she looked a bit annoyed, particularly as she was looking at me. She is starting to make me feel uncomfortable. What's going on with her?

[Andy_K]

Perhaps you're better looking than her and she's jealous. Perhaps she has a crush on (or history with) your personal trainer. Perhaps she's crazy. Perhaps she's just a b**ch.

 

Either way, it doesn't matter. Don't waste your mental energy on it. Ignore and get on with your training.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

Is he her boyfriend maybe? Do you see her interacting with other people in a normal way? Specifically women?

[girlygo]

Is he her boyfriend maybe? Do you see her interacting with other people in a normal way? Specifically women?

 

I don't know whether she's his boyfriend (if they were an item that would certainly make for an uncomfortable working environment!) but she treats all of her female clients normally. I don't know whether that's because she's training them though so they don't have to have anything to do with him. The other day, I was doing my squats in front of the mirror and she literally came and stood almost in front of me, pretending to move weights whilst looking at my PT. He then just gestured at her to move out of the way. So weird. I've also noticed that when there are other people around she makes a point of talking really loudly as though she wants to be the centre of attention. I know I should ignore her behaviour but I can't help but find it intimidating/unsettling because she's so downright rude.

 

It's got to the point now whereby recently my PT just ends my session and walks off as though he's worried to talk to me any longer than he was previously. However, his behaviour completely changed toward me and he's been more friendly, smiling more and asked me twice how my weekend was. Maybe he feels embarassed by her behaviour?

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

He probably does feel embarrassed! Are you a better looking woman than she is? Is there a way you can discretely ask him what's up her ass?

[thefooloftheyear]

Do yourself a favor and find a female trainer...I can't tell you how many times I hear of the drama and bs involving female clients and male trainers....

 

Sometimes I wonder if guys get into it for the cheap thrills and women hire them for the drama, flirting, and dreaming...

 

You will probably make better progress with a woman as well...That's the goal, right??

 

TFY

[preraph]

Maybe she's his boss and wants to make sure there's training going on.

[mikeylo]

Gyms are notorious for this kind of stuff. Personal trainers have quite a bit of bad reputation. Anyway, why do you care? You are there to train , right ? If it's uncomfortable, get a female trainer. Women know women's body better anyway!

[girlygo]

Gyms are notorious for this kind of stuff. Personal trainers have quite a bit of bad reputation. Anyway, why do you care? You are there to train , right ? If it's uncomfortable, get a female trainer. Women know women's body better anyway!

.

 

Ermm.. good point but the only problem is that the only other personal trainer there is her . Plus I've committed to another 2 months up front with this guy so I have to stick it out or lose out.

[girlygo]

Maybe she's his boss and wants to make sure there's training going on.

 

Nope, she's not his boss, she's a much younger colleague...

[girlygo]

He probably does feel embarrassed! Are you a better looking woman than she is? Is there a way you can discretely ask him what's up her ass?

 

I guess looks are subjective but yes, you could say conventionally I'm better looking, but then she's younger! I could ask my PT what's up with her but then that would look like I'm making a real issue of it. It's not stopping me from training but her behaviour is becoming increasingly weird.

[devilish innocent]

I wonder if maybe she's new and wants to be close enough to observe your trainer so she can learn by watching him.

[NJ123]

It really feels like that she has a crush on the trainer & views you as competition especially if you're more attractive than she is.

[girlygo]

Well, thought I would give you all an update. I went in today and my PT was completely different with me. He was alot more talkative, relaxed and spent more time with me than normal for answering questions on my progress etc. Little Miss B***chy was in the vicinity, training with another client but she didn't come near me this time and seemed to keep a reasonable distance. Still no smiles or hellos but at least I can breathe and relax a bit now! I think maybe he has had a word with her?