What makes stalking your ex on Facebook so addicting?

[ZayKayWill]

Had to force myself to stop not too long ago. Been doing a good job so far. It's weird how something so destructive is yet so addicting...anyone have any idea what the logic behind it is?

[preraph]

Curiosity kills the cat. Actually, it's an act of control, the last dying remnant of control you are able to exercise. But it's self-destructive.

[duncsvoice]

Because you're not over your ex.

[PegNosePete]

I would imagine it's because you want to see some kind of justice or "karma". You want your ex to be miserable because of the way they ended the relationship or moved on or treated you. So you stalk their facebook looking for clues that they are unhappy. Invariably you find pics of them having a great time with their friends or new partner, not thinking about you or the relationship or feeling sad at all, and get upset because you think they should be miserable forever as a consequence of their actions.

[Purepony]

Being bored and not having a life go out there and do something for yourself that way you can enjoy and have something to experience

 

I can't stand people on Facebook looking at other people live life well they just sit there and thumb up

[avvril3000]

oh god... i dont know. i am in a happy (the best) relationship but i still wonder about my exes and wanna find out more, how theyve moved on, if they have, if theyre sad pathetic people still or not. mind you, its hard for me to do this, because both exes are blocked, either me blocked or them blocked because i dont wanna physically talk to them. haha...its a weird thing. i honestly wish i didnt wanna look at their ****... but i do.

[carnelian]

If you are only looking at her facebook page and seeing what she is doing,

there's nothing wrong with that in itself. It is normal. Millions of people do that every day and it's usually innocent. Mark Zuckerburg would agree.

 

Stalking is intended to mean actual following someone around --not on the internet. Feminists and others now think it is trendy to use the word stalking for virtually anything.

[somanymistakes]

If you are only looking at her facebook page and seeing what she is doing,

there's nothing wrong with that in itself. It is normal. Millions of people do that every day and it's usually innocent. Mark Zuckerburg would agree.

 

Stalking is intended to mean actual following someone around --not on the internet. Feminists and others now think it is trendy to use the word stalking for virtually anything.

 

Welcome to English, the meaning of words changes constantly and depends on who's using them. Even the "intent" of words changes. Dictionary definitions get updated as usage alters.

 

Some people would think that if a guy keeps "randomly turning up" at your workplace and other places you frequent, to get an excuse to talk to you, that's stalking. Other people would think that doesn't count and stalking is only if you're literally following someone around all day walking ten paces behind them.

 

When it comes to cyber-stalking, I don't personally think checking out someone's facebook page once in a while is stalking them. If you're reloading it ten times a day, checking for location updates, checking to see when they were last logged in, looking up all their other social media accounts and cross-referencing to try and work out what they do all day long, trying to guess their password so you can read all their messages and see who they've been talking to, figuring out who their friends are and using those friends to get more info on them or threatening those friends to stay away because she's YOURS... at some point this really does become very creepy behavior!

[Otter2569]

Answer = Nothing. I don't do it. If I was compelled to act like that I would block her/him.

 

You are clearly not over this person and still want them if you are acting like this...it may be hard but its time to move on.

[cocorico]

Not long ago, my xH sent me a friend request on FB. I left it unanswered for months and then finally accepted, because he now lives with my daughter and her partner and they're FB friends of mine anyway. My H and xH are not FB friends, although he's friendly to my H and my H is civil to him. I've only ever looked at his profile once, when a mutual friend wanted to contact him and wasn't sure he had the correct mobile number. I simply have no interest in what he gets up to - even before he moved in with my daughter - because he's history.

 

I did recently accept a friend request from another old x, though - he posted some old photos of some travels we shared decades ago and invited me so I could see them. We caught up briefly but I doubt either of us are interested enough to spend time on each other's profile. Our lives have gone very different ways and there's nothing much of interest, I suspect.

[amaysngrace]

I'd stalk my exH if I could but he blocked me. I'd probably be all pissy about that except for he blocked our children too.

 

Who blocks their own children??

 

Anyhoo I think it's normal to stalk exes. I say this because this is exactly what I do too so of course it's perfectly normal.