Jos_za Posted May 31, 2017 Posted May 31, 2017 Hi all, wondering if someone could possible give me advice: My gf and I have dating for 3 years now, and I had to move to another town around 200 miles away from where we are from due to a job offer. We see each other every weekend and obviously we are alone in separate towns during the week. Her family and friends stay in our home town, and the town I moved to, I don't have family but I've made a hand full of good friends. After moving here, I was introduced to (one of the few left) The Business Gentlemans Club in town. And no, it ain't a strip joint. This is a mens only club, thus no woman allowed, not even to work in the establishment. Main aim is for business men to get together and network. So, I frequent the club every Wednesday evening for roughly 3 hours, have a good chat, a good laugh and a few pints. My gf is aware of this. I also pop in during the course of the weak as I buy my cigarettes there, have a cold drink or a quick drink and mosey on home. As a "single" guy during the week, out of respect for my gf I do not attend pubs or clubs where there are woman, and I don't accept invites by other couples, or invite other couples to my place during the week, as I don't find it acceptable. So, my gf visits her family on the odd occasions during the week and has friends over on the very occasion which I don't mind. BUT, she wants me to quit the club and when I do, we can continue our relationship. Once again, I will take the critical comments out of this, would just love some feedback on the scenario. I also reiterate, there is no funny stuff that happens at the Gentlemans Club as I will not tolerate it and the big reason I joined was that I don't sit cooped up looking at 4 walls during the week so that I get decent conversation outside of my work. I cannot befriend my work people as I manage the whole branch. Advice someone please as I want to be happy but also keep my gf happy
d0nnivain Posted May 31, 2017 Posted May 31, 2017 If you were going to a strip club that often I could see her point. While I take some umbrage at the discrimination of the place -- precluding women in business from the networking opportunities afford to men -- I would think your GF would be happy about the segregation. Since she's not you have to figure out what you want to do. Keep the club or her. It's unreasonable request on her part but a clear choice on yours. (not that the answer is clear but that that you have 2 choices).
preraph Posted May 31, 2017 Posted May 31, 2017 Here's why she's unhappy. If you Google Business Gentlemens Club, it's just strip joint, strip joint, strip joint and nothing else. So what is she to think? I have never heard of such a place. What country are you in? They can't even do that in the US, exclude women. I suggest if you are telling the truth and this is a non-strip club and truly a business club, which I've never heard of. Sounds like a country club but then there'd be golf, right? Anyway, get a brochure and send it to her so she can see what it says about the place. Or give her the exact link to their website. If none of that is available, it sounds too shady for most women to swallow. Just sayin. 1
Author Jos_za Posted May 31, 2017 Author Posted May 31, 2017 Hi preraph, We are in South Africa, and to be fair, I have used the wording "Business Club" to try and get users from other countries to try and understand the concept as such. Herewith a link to have more insight https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gentlemen%27s_club Trust me, I most definitely do not want to put myself in a predicament by visiting clubs if ill repute, and I certainly do not want to harm my relationship in any way by doing that. Too old for that in any case. And to answer your question, I stay in a very small town where both my gf and I have embedded ourselves into the community as such, and she knows most of the members, and their wives who are affiliated to the club. Funny thing, and a true story. The wives were invited to the club a few years back, and got so bored that they said to all the men, they would rather not visit the place ever again because it was boring lol Our club caters for snooker players (2 full size tables) as well as darts players. If that gives you more of an idea. Thus, my gf knows where the club is, and the happeneings and events therof.
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