QuestioningMind Posted May 31, 2017 Posted May 31, 2017 (edited) Hi, all. Just wanted to know what your (males) experiences were / are like when giving your number to women? Or if you haven't done so, why not? I matched with one person on Tinder last week, conversations were so-so, and I shot out an offer to meet up some time this week, she agreed. Threw out my number to gauge interest, and she said that she'd prefer messaging on the app. Fine by me. Checked the app this morning and realized she unmatched with me. Not a big deal since I wasn't really feeling it nor did we finalize plans. Matched with someone else on Tinder yesterday, exchanged messages throughout the day, and I extended an offer for dinner or a drink for Friday. She said she'd let me know later in the week if Friday will work, then I replied with my number (to make things easier), and that I was fine with hearing her response about Friday once she figures out her schedule. Not sure if it matters, but I'm 28 and these women were / are 27 and 28. Back to my question: Have any of you guys offered your number first and if so, what made you do it? And did she actually text or call you? Edited May 31, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Removed bolding
carhill Posted May 31, 2017 Posted May 31, 2017 Might work differently with women of the younger generations but ladies my age when I was young variously laughed or chided at such attempts. Women don't call men; men call women. Real men anyway. However, that was back when phones had rotary dials 2
Bastile Posted May 31, 2017 Posted May 31, 2017 I've done this many times. And I can safely say that it's a daft thing to do. Can't speak for online dating, as I don't have really enough experience with OLD, and giving my number through it, to come to a proper conclusion. However, I have approached hundreds of women on the street. And I have given my number, without receiving theirs, enough times to say that it leads nowhere. It's usually a woman with low-interest, or serious fear based boundaries. Something is wrong with the male/female dynamic. I went from giving the number to experiment, to giving the number not caring, to now just challenging it or just politely declining. Had women follow through with messaging, but getting them out on a date is another thing entirely... Usually these girls are looking for a text buddy. Or they were not really interested, but they were enjoying my game and wanted more - it's value taking behaviour like mooching. Not had sexual relations with any girl when giving my number on the street. Have had relationships with women that took my number in social circles and the like. But these women often turned out to be stalker like people. One actually did turn out to be a proper stalker who threatened weird things like suicide and calling the police and all sorts of tomfoolery. Women should want you to take their number. And your part of the dance is to go take it. Often, anything else is playing silly buggers on one side or the other.
Gr8fuln2020 Posted May 31, 2017 Posted May 31, 2017 When I feel that I have made a connection with someone online, I offer my number. This is to do a few things... 1. Take away from the dating site 2. Let her know that I am safe and confident enough to do so 3. Provide some incentive to stop doing the online emailing and transition to texting (of which I also get her number) and finally, hopefully to speaking I only do this with ladies that I feel that I have a confident connection with. For the most part, if they are not really interested, they won't and no harm done. I recently gave out my number, but she has not taken the offer. I am certain she is also hesitant about giving out personal information which I absolutely understand. Now days, with smart phones, it is easy to block, ignore calls. If there is anything important to be said, leave a message or text one. I have found that the ladies I have contacted are judicious about my number, so nothing strange has ever happened by giving it out.
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