caring guy Posted August 3, 2005 Posted August 3, 2005 How can i deal with this sick to the stomach feeing & pictures in my head! We've had probs & probs that have been within the 4 walls like a little lack of romance, things for granted, complacence,lack commitment etc, mostly things between us. Only a couple of time she thought if my ex came back i'd jump back with her, but i never would & my gf is a little insecure & i know i have made her feel bad & not emotionally been there for her. Never the less i tell her i love her, buy her flowers & we do lots, walks etc, but a lack of romance recently. She never goes out as she has kids, but one night 3 weeks ago went out & was approached by a guy, they had dinner days later, & he went back to hers, they snogged, gave her a lovebite but she declined sex as she was thinking of me. She says he made her feel special & wanted sex, but couldn't, as she wants to sort us out & for me to be more of the above. Now i am, but i can't get this picture out of my head, it hurts so much & makes me want to be sick. She's told me all this & been honest & i believe they never had sex, but i just well up when i think of this & feel sick.. She gets back from her holiday with her family & mum next week & says we're going to be together & i can show her my feelings & commitment, we've talked on phone & she wants this,& is going to tell him that we're have a period of triial. If this guy likes her & i mess up, she's his!, & she don't believe i can change, but i said Actions Speak Louder Than Words & SHE WANTS TO BELIEVE ME,, but only time will tell, i aint got a time machine! What can i do, i hate these pictures that going on in my head of those 2 on our sofa & even in the house we share most the time, that he was kissing her neck,,aagh i'm gonna spue!!! Please help CG
Author caring guy Posted August 5, 2005 Author Posted August 5, 2005 I do want her, i know i've been a jerk towards her, made her cry & feel alone, ok i never cheated on her! What pi--es me off, is that she says that the bad times i gave her over the 16 months or so, like occasionally drinking too much, being complacent, not emotionaly supporting her & making the effort & making her feel wanted, warrant her 2 timing me for a similar length of time, to make up! Is it me, or is there a big difference of 'bad trash' here? CG
SoftDrink Posted August 5, 2005 Posted August 5, 2005 so you treat her badly, and she cheats on you. doesn't sound like this relationship is going anywhere, at least not anywhere good. maybe you should just make a clean break of it and start over with someone else. also, i know it is bothering you, but obsessing over this thing you cannot change is not healthy. you're going to associate her with those images for a long time. even if you start fighting about something, you will end up drudging these images back up, getting angry all over again, and bringing it up, starting a whole new argument. if you think it's worth it to work on it, fine, do it, but be prepared to try to forgive and forget what happened, because it will never work otherwise.
Author caring guy Posted August 5, 2005 Author Posted August 5, 2005 True, this may be drudged up in future arguments, but we have talked about it on phone & will to more extent on her vacation return. I know these images are horrible to me & hurt, but she has the same of me however, aren't images of cheating which i believe are far worse! We sms & caht & don't argue, we're ok & will talk, i ust don't want to be involved with her & this other guy whilst she makes up her mind. Should i give an ultimatum???
Recommended Posts