What's a woman's true mindset when it comes to online dating?

[NJ123]

Maybe a bit unrelated to the OP topics but I was wondering how long it takes you to reply back on online dating if you were interested in someone? I'm talking with some girl now but she takes quite awhile to reply back. She usually responds in detail & asks a question back though.

Edited May 31, 2017 by NJ123

[lucy_in_disguise]

When I did OLD, my goal was to meet as many people who met my general criteria as possible. I dont think profiles offer enough info to get a good feel for compatiliry/ attraction- that's what first and second dates are for. Old just facilitates that. Looks and content both matter.

 

Looks are more of a qualifier. When I did OLD I wasn't looking for the hottest guy, but someone I could see myself attracted to. I have a fairly wide range for what I find attractive but generally being in shape is key here for me. I'm not going to give someone outside my range of preferences a chance because I don't see a need to- my range is broad enough where there are plenty of people who fall within it.

 

In terms of content, I wasn't looking for anything specific, but a few sentences to demonstrate your grammar (intelligence qualifier) and some indication of what you are doing with your life (profession or hobbies). Common interests are a bonus, though not a requirement. A challenging professional for which you have some level of passion is a requirement, but not necessarily something that I am expecting to come off in the profile- imo, first/ second dates are appropriate to assess this aspect. Any indication that the person was only looking for sex/ wasn't over their prior relationship, or harbored bitterness toward women was a deal breaker. Likewise any hint of creepiness in his messages.

 

Income matters to some extent in that I would like a fairly balanced relationship. but again this is not something I would expect to be able to gauge from the profile. I think the income questions are tacky and would expect many people to answer sarcastically or to lie.

 

So to summarize: fitness, good grammar, indication of a profession or hobbies, and no creepy siht qualified someone for a first date. Surprisingly, even this bare bones criteria eliminates many men.

[lucy_in_disguise]

When I did OLD, my goal was to meet as many people who met my general criteria as possible. I dont think profiles offer enough info to get a good feel for compatiliry/ attraction- that's what first and second dates are for. Old just facilitates that. Looks and content both matter.

 

Looks are more of a qualifier. When I did OLD I wasn't looking for the hottest guy, but someone I could see myself attracted to. I have a fairly wide range for what I find attractive but generally being in shape is key here for me. I'm not going to give someone outside my range of preferences a chance because I don't see a need to- my range is broad enough where there are plenty of people who fall within it.

 

In terms of content, I wasn't looking for anything specific, but a few sentences to demonstrate your grammar (intelligence qualifier) and some indication of what you are doing with your life (profession or hobbies). Common interests are a bonus, though not a requirement. A challenging professional for which you have some level of passion is a requirement, but not necessarily something that I am expecting to come off in the profile- imo, first/ second dates are appropriate to assess this aspect. Any indication that the person was only looking for sex/ wasn't over their prior relationship, or harbored bitterness toward women was a deal breaker. Likewise any hint of creepiness in his messages.

 

Income matters to some extent in that I would like a fairly balanced relationship. but again this is not something I would expect to be able to gauge from the profile. I think the income questions are tacky and would expect many people to answer sarcastically or to lie.

 

So to summarize: fitness, good grammar, indication of a profession or hobbies, and no creepy siht qualified someone for a first date. Surprisingly, even this bare bones criteria eliminates many men.

[Phoenician]

I know many women in person who use online dating just to test how many males they can get ; a validation that they use for their self estem !

[NJ123]

I know many women in person who use online dating just to test how many males they can get ; a validation that they use for their self estem !

 

Yeah, it's starting to feel that way. I had a woman just ghost on me after seemingly being interested with asking me questions about myself. Than all of a sudden nothing at all. I think she's been on the site for quite awhile since I'm pretty sure I saw her when I was on it a long while back so I guess she's just using it for validation. I'm going to have to start joining clubs/meet ups or something it seems like if I want to have a chance to be with someone. Online dating just doesn't seem like the way to go.

[NJ123]

When I did OLD, my goal was to meet as many people who met my general criteria as possible. I dont think profiles offer enough info to get a good feel for compatiliry/ attraction- that's what first and second dates are for. Old just facilitates that. Looks and content both matter.

 

Looks are more of a qualifier. When I did OLD I wasn't looking for the hottest guy, but someone I could see myself attracted to. I have a fairly wide range for what I find attractive but generally being in shape is key here for me. I'm not going to give someone outside my range of preferences a chance because I don't see a need to- my range is broad enough where there are plenty of people who fall within it.

 

In terms of content, I wasn't looking for anything specific, but a few sentences to demonstrate your grammar (intelligence qualifier) and some indication of what you are doing with your life (profession or hobbies). Common interests are a bonus, though not a requirement. A challenging professional for which you have some level of passion is a requirement, but not necessarily something that I am expecting to come off in the profile- imo, first/ second dates are appropriate to assess this aspect. Any indication that the person was only looking for sex/ wasn't over their prior relationship, or harbored bitterness toward women was a deal breaker. Likewise any hint of creepiness in his messages.

 

Income matters to some extent in that I would like a fairly balanced relationship. but again this is not something I would expect to be able to gauge from the profile. I think the income questions are tacky and would expect many people to answer sarcastically or to lie.

 

So to summarize: fitness, good grammar, indication of a profession or hobbies, and no creepy siht qualified someone for a first date. Surprisingly, even this bare bones criteria eliminates many men.

 

This is what makes it very difficult for me. I don't have the greatest job currently & I don't fall into a lot of women's height preference so I get eliminated as an option by probably the vast majority. Even on match.com I made a free profile & it turned out I was eliminated as an option from 80-90% of women due to their income or height preference.

[Blanco]

I see good looking women every day with mediocre or downright goony looking boyfriends/husbands. Sure, plenty of good looking women link up with good looking men. But you make it sound like it's the rule. It's not.