mg101 Posted May 24, 2017 Posted May 24, 2017 Went out with a guy this weekend I've known on social media through mutual friends for 2yrs. He lives out of town but was here. Good looking, impeccable dresser, great personality, educated. Even good chemistry, we kissed, had great banter etc. But the whole time he was talking i was missing the familiarity of my ex. He wants me to attend a wedding with him out of town in a few weeks. What's wrong with me.? It's been a year. And my ex has a new something. Will i ever move on?? Advice.
Zahara Posted May 24, 2017 Posted May 24, 2017 Went out with a guy this weekend I've known on social media through mutual friends for 2yrs. He lives out of town but was here. Good looking, impeccable dresser, great personality, educated. Even good chemistry, we kissed, had great banter etc. But the whole time he was talking i was missing the familiarity of my ex. He wants me to attend a wedding with him out of town in a few weeks. What's wrong with me.? It's been a year. And my ex has a new something. Will i ever move on?? Advice. You will move on when you decide you want and deserve better. It hasn't been a year. You only recently dug at the wound again. You kept in touch with him as I recall for months on end. Moving on takes effort and discipline. It requires a desire for self-preservation. Until you instill those boundaries, you'll be where you are. And you should not be dating. It only reinforces the pain you feel for your ex as you have not completely healed from him. 1
Author mg101 Posted May 24, 2017 Author Posted May 24, 2017 You will move on when you decide you want and deserve better. It hasn't been a year. You only recently dug at the wound again. You kept in touch with him as I recall for months on end. Moving on takes effort and discipline. It requires a desire for self-preservation. Until you instill those boundaries, you'll be where you are. And you should not be dating. It only reinforces the pain you feel for your ex as you have not completely healed from him. I hear u. But its been a year, i feel i should be dating and more seriously.
Bromeo Posted May 24, 2017 Posted May 24, 2017 (edited) I hear u. But its been a year, i feel i should be dating and more seriously. I went through this as well. I was under the false mentality of getting over one by getting under another. It didn't help, and only made things worse. I've also waited, tried dating much later, wasn't ready then either. I've passed on some perfect life partners because I tried to jump the gun. Nothing is wrong with being single. Your emotions just need time to settle and reset a bit. I've been broke up with mine for 10 months, with 4 strict no contact, and I'm not there yet. I'm finding when I'm stressed or tired, the emotions of the breakup come back, but thankfully leave quicker. I had to sell my home, transfer back to where I grew up, and just chill for awhile with my folks and old friends. All of this was done to be closer to my daughter, and put the craziness of my breakup behind me. And its helped. I don't look for her car everywhere, I'm not sad when I get home and she isn't there, and I don't drive past the places we hung out. Point is, the advice around here doesn't change. Be patient with yourself. I tried dating a very beautiful woman, but I could see she and I both had past scar tissue that wasn't fully processed. So I had to let her go. However, my breakup has caused me to communicate much, much more effectively. If you aren't ready, that's fine. Just realize it, and don't force things. Edited May 25, 2017 by Bromeo 1
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