Is not liking animals or pets a deal-breaker?

[todreaminblue]

My ex had a cousin who joked about sucking his gf cockatiel up a vacume cleaner...as an animal lover...i was horrified.....i couldnt be with a guy who didnt like animals ...because my dream is to own a permaculture farm.....im a farm girl..and it has been said by a few fo my friends that i only want to have a farm so i can take very stray dog and keepthem...its untrue..i woudl only keep twenty.. i want to do permaculture because every animal every plant every scrap of soil and water on my farm is going to have a purpose even weeds i plan to eat the weeds...deb the weed eater..and i plan to have animals en masse..my dogs will be protection for the chickens ducks geese and goats....or the emu will eb protection....

 

...animals are not only loyal companions...they make the earth what it is today....they are necessary..for our very survival......responsible pet ownership is always needed in line with that necessity and you dont abandon animals or get them on a whim..orgive them up to eb with a non pet lovin person....its irresponsible and wrong...animals are gods creatures and we were put on earth to have dominion not ...extinction......i have owned protection dogs nearly since i have been out of home...i take in stray animals...and i find them homes or their original home......i also take in stray people too....mainly kids.....

 

i would severely annoy a non animal lover......my dogs knock on the door to come in they hate it when i put them outside when peopel come which i do out fo respect for peopel in my life who might eb a little animalshy.......i have taken on dogs that were onorary and unsocialised and turned them into dogs that can live with many people and even cats.....i dont really find animals the animals find me......i baby sit other peoples animals...i enjoy it....i have given up tryign to give th eneighbours dog back ...we tried filling up the holes under the fence adn he woudl hurt himself trying to squeezein and under so now he just lives with us.....and he is happy..he gets walked and he get sto be part fo our pack......i havent the heart to hear him how from the otehr side fo the fence or watch him scrape his skin off getting back to us.....neither does the owner...she jus tpats him when she sees him down the shop on his walks...

 

i dont pick the animals they pick my family...so yes i would not be suited to a non animal lover.....my ex used to get so annoyed at me in the beginning.....but he tolerated animals..i have always had huge dogs...rotties...mastiffs.....ridgebacks..even got attached at one stage to my animals....before that.....didnt like them at all....

 

i understand you dont like animals and i really suggest you find a similar person who has your same feeling about animals...it will save a lot of heart ache if you get this clear and out there....early......i wish you well......deb

[SpiralOut]

It is not a deal breaker for me so long as the guy isn't cruel to my cat. My SO isn't much of an animal person. He doesn't hate them, but he doesn't love them either. One of the first things I told him when we started dating is that I have a cat and that the two of us are a package deal. He doesn't show my cat much affection, but he obviously cares about her well-being. He feeds her if I'm working late, offers to drive us to the vet, etc. We all live together quite peacefully now.

Edited May 25, 2017 by SpiralOut

[preraph]

I don't trust people who don't like animals because they remind me of Michael Vick

 

I hate him! I can't believe the Humane Society let him do his community service there. I wouldn't let him near an animal of mine. You can't teach someone empathy! That's why violent criminals get life.

[preraph]

Here's the deal: If someone doesn't LOVE animals, I can't make them a part of my household or trust them to watch and take care of them when I'm gone and not let them get out, etc. So I have a couple friends who don't like animals but are extra people-social, but I would never live with one of them if I had pets or leave them alone in my house with them.

[CptInsano]

For me it's not a deal-breaker within a certain range. Somebody may not have pets because he/she has other things in life that take priority. I personally don't mind most pets, but I also don't have a lot of time, so I only have a few snakes. I wouldn't mind a woman with a pet, as long as she doesn't want to dump the responsibility for the pet upon me.

 

For me it becomes problematic if the animal becomes a lifestyle or the pet is more or less a terror.

[thefooloftheyear]

Just hard to believe that anyone can actually dislike animals...Especially dogs...All they want to do is please you...

 

I always had large dogs, but my kid wanted a smaller one, so we got this little Shih Tzu from the shelter...She looked like a tiny snowball with eyes..Anyway, she turned out to be the most awesome dog I have ever owned!!...She clings to me like crazy....she just stares at me so lovingly and just loves attention we give her.....I look kinda silly(Im a big dude) gushing over a tiny little dog, but I can't help it...far different from my old Pitbull(rip), but still awesome..

 

I just can't imagine being with someone that didn't feel the same...I can see not having an animal due to life circumstances...But not liking them?? Nuts..

 

TFY

[RecentChange]

I am an "animal person" and it's totally not a deal breaker for me.

 

Like others said, as long as you could tolerate my pets, and not be unfair / mean nasty to them, it would be okay with me.

 

Now that said, I have two cats. They really like only me, one of which has lived with me and my husband for 10 years now, and still darts out of the room when he moves (but purrs and meows for me constantly).

 

When I was younger I always had roommates, and made sure that my cat was never a burden - kept things very clean, she hung out in my room if I wasn't home etc. My cat, my responsibility, really non of my SO's concern.

 

And I have a horse - but it's boarded, so again, not a part of my SO's life.

 

Just hard to believe that anyone can actually dislike animals...Especially dogs...All they want to do is please you...

 

 

Actually I am not much of a dog person for this very reason. I find the easy to obtain, unconditional love stuff kinda annoying.

 

I prefer cats, and my horse of a notorious stubborn breed because their love and cooperation has to be earned. Treat them unfairly and they give you a big F you! Earn it, and you have something.

 

We have two terrier mixes (hubby brought home both). I give them exercise and food and manage their health care - he is emotionally bonded with them, and gives them cuddle time etc.

 

I am bad cop, he's good cop when it comes to the dogs.

[aileD]

Our pets were the ones that were there for us when boys broke our hearts and made us cry. Pets loved us unconditionally when we got fat. Pets know when you're sad and how to comfort you when the people in your life treat you wrong.

 

So yes. If you don't like my pets, I don't want to marry you.

[MJJean]

I couldn't imagine even dating someone who didn't love animals. Not tolerate, but love. So, yes, not being a pet person would be a dealbeaker for me.

 

I grew up with pets. DH never had so much as a goldfish. When we were dating he gently suggested I might want to "get rid" of my dog. I told him if it ever came down to a choice between him or my dog, well, I'd miss him. I was not joking.

[Andy_K]

So what do you think? Will someone who is not an animal person kill your interest in that person?

 

Yes.

 

Whether they have any pets is largely irrelevant, but I find the single best indicator of someone's general character and capacity for empathy is how good they are with animals and children.

[Birdies]

I could live with / marry someone who didn't *love* animals but could at least tolerate them and be pleasant about it (i.e. no constant complaining about pet fur, pet expenses, me talking to my cats like they're my little furry friends, etc).

 

I could NOT live with / marry someone who didn't want to have pets or who would complain about them. I wouldn't date someone like that, so that I wouldn't have to eventually choose between them and my pets. Animals are a big part of my personal happiness and that is a dealbreaker.

[preraph]

Yes.

 

Whether they have any pets is largely irrelevant, but I find the single best indicator of someone's general character and capacity for empathy is how good they are with animals and children.

 

There's a whole lot of people who are only good with one or the other, and I'm one of them. I am great with animals and not at all with kids. But I am vastly outnumbered by the amount of people who are good with kids but act like animals are walking germs. Which when you think about it, if you're not teaching your kid to be kind to and have empathy for animals, you probably can't be considered that good with kids either.

 

My ex-friend who doesn't like animals had a child and we came across a litter of kittens in a boat shop one time and she showed them to him but freaked out when he reached to touch them as if they were nasty and dirty. Jeez. She has diagnosed mental illnesses, and I don't think she was a very good parent either because of her limitations.

[GravityMan]

Not having any pets of your own probably won't be any cause for concern for most people, assuming you like animals. I.E. it's not a big deal...most people won't care. Tons of people like animals but don't have any pets for various reasons (e.g. allergies, insufficient time to provide TLC for them, etc.)

 

Not liking a particular kind of animal probably also isn't that big of a deal. Plenty of normal well-adjusted people love dogs and horses but aren't big fans of cats, for example. Chances are they'll still be tolerant of cats. It will often come down to personal preference whether a potential partner is OK with that.

 

DISLIKING animals in general though is a different story. It depends on why you don't like them, but in general a person that outright dislikes animals is going to give most people some pause (including a lot of people that aren't big-time animal lovers). Also note that an "animal-hater" person that lacks self-discipline and has low emotional intelligence may have less patience with animals...or worse, even angrily or cruelly lash out at them (often irrationally so). Such a person will likely be incompatible with most people in society.

 

Any responsible, aware person that has a pet will probably want to make that fact known in the early stages of dating, and will pay close attention to the other person's verbal and nonverbal reaction. Likewise when introducing that person to the pet for the first time. (And pay attention to the reactions and body language of both the person AND the pet.) If the person's reaction isn't friendly, accommodating or at least tolerant/accepting...then it's likely that any chance of a future romantic relationship will be at or near zero. Someone that is intolerant and hateful towards animals is likely immature, and likely has other significant social, personality and/or character problems.

 

I think each person's position on animals and face-to-face attitude towards pets is a component of interpersonal compatibility that should be taken seriously. Not just for romantic relationships, but also for friendships.

[cocorico]

So what do you think? Will someone who is not an animal person kill your interest in that person?

 

Absolutely. I would never even consider such a person for a ONS, never mind a R.

[Eternal Sunshine]

Total deal breaker.

 

I adore animals. My mum said that when I was a baby, I would look at smile at any cats or dogs near by. My first word was trying to call a cat to come closer.

 

I stop and pet random dogs and cats that I see outside all the time. I currently don't have a pet because I travel a lot for work and it would be cruel to the animal to be left alone or at pet hotels all the time. I miss having a pet every day and will get my cat to move here as soon as I can.

 

I don't want someone that will just tolerate an animal. I need someone that will genuinely love them. It's one thing that we have to share.

[wmacbride]

I'm a bird person, and while many people are fascinated by parrots, many don't realize how much care and attention they need. Even my newly adopted lovebird and "special needs" budgie need a lot of care, and with larger birds, it can be a lifelong commitment.

 

If I was dating, I think I could really understand if that made a guy nervous about a long term relationship, and since I like birds, and would not be willing to give them up to be with a guy, I'd probably be alone ( unless I was able to find a guy who was good to my birds too.)

 

I also love cats, but don't currently have one. Dogs ( and I know this will get some people up in arms) I'm not so sold on. They are fine if they are someone elses and I don't have to take care of them and that person trains them well. There are some dogs that you can really tell have been well socialized and are great around people. Personally, I would see that as a good sign for that guy, as he took them time and effort to train his dog, and he loved it enough to make the commitment to do that and saw it through.

 

I don't think I'd turn down a relationship with someone who has a dog like that, just so long as I don't have to look after it. I don't think I could get involved with someone who goes overboard about it. There's nothing wrong with doing so if it makes him happy, but I don't think i could be around that for very long.