smile Posted August 2, 2005 Posted August 2, 2005 I am not even sure where to post my ramblings anymore. This situation has gotten out of hand. It's been three weeks since I have seen my ex and less than 24hrs since we talked. I told him in midjune this was too hard and I couldnt be his buddy. He had called me everyday for a week and I just couldn't answer. Around 4th of july i caved. Anyway then he came over to pay the phone bill 3 weeks ago and it was akward. I didnt even want him here, didnt want hugs didnt want anything. When I was in the other room he asked my roomate to help me get over him. I cried and cried after he left. NOW , three weeks later , he has been calling again. At least 14 times in the last 5 days. He txted me and he left this sad msg that just said "nothing" then he hung up. I would never answer So yesterday I get a msg that says "I have been trying to call you for a while now, I need to talk to you about something. " then he seems to get mad at me (bc I wasnt answering ?) and said "ok thanks bye" all pissy. So stupid me I call him back. Worried that something is wrong. Well he gets on the phone and said "oh i had a question about the phone but nevermind I figured it all out. How are you? " WHAT? we dont even have the same phone plan anymore. Is that not something he could figure out alone? Then he proceeded to tell me he saw my mom and talked about stuff. I was pissed but I didnt act mad I just was disinterested. So he said "I guess I won't keep you any longer I will let you go" I said ok. So then he was like "I will talk to you later ok?" and I just said "ok bye". And when I hung up I was mad at us both. Him for being such a jerk and me for returning his call. If a guy doesnt want you and asks that you move on, who oh why does he feel the need to call? And why cant he use his new friends and girls he has been meeting to help figure this all out? I am not a cingular cell phone specialist. What do I know about his phone bill? BTW I have met this amazing guy. The first guy since my ex that made my knees weak. When he shook my hand and smiled it seriously felt like in movies where everything goes in cheesy slow motion. He is so sweet and we had fun hanging out. It may lead to nothing but I think its good that I am seeing there is more out there. Gosh he is dreamy .
Marshbear32 Posted August 2, 2005 Posted August 2, 2005 He feels responsible for dumping you and wants to try and smooth things to make himself feel better ( not you ). I'm sure he still feels something for you and it takes time to let go. Just keep doing what your doing ( don't talk to him ) and he will move on. BTW I have met this amazing guy. The first guy since my ex that made my knees weak. When he shook my hand and smiled it seriously felt like in movies where everything goes in cheesy slow motion. He is so sweet and we had fun hanging out. It may lead to nothing but I think its good that I am seeing there is more out there. Gosh he is dreamy . This sounds like rebound dating. I wouldn't start another relationship until your sure your ready. Don't fall into the trap of "getting under one man to get over another".
dr strangelove Posted August 2, 2005 Posted August 2, 2005 Your ex acts like my ex. See but the difference is she is female. Also you have made it clear that you want to get back. Honestly you can have him any time you want. Id ignore his calls and hang out with the new guy.
Author smile Posted August 2, 2005 Author Posted August 2, 2005 I know what you mean about the rebound thing. But it kinda doesn't seem like that. There was a guy who was NOT my type but whose attention I thoroughy enjoyed getting. We never really did much but that really helped reinstate some self esteem. Its funny bc this guy is really fun and really cute. He makes everyone I know swoon like I said I did. I wasnt about to do the rebound thing but it HAS been a year technically. And I think it is time I looked at a guy without comparing him to the ex. In fact this guy makes me not even think about the ex. About the ex... he is the one who said he has moved on and now i need to do the same. Thats the lame part about it all. Like I am hanging on so sad and pathetic but HE is the one calling for no good reason. I DONT LIKE THIS AT ALL!!!! The boy I was in love with for 3 years has treated me in ways I never ever believed he could. He just has this insensitivity .. no idea that maybe I cant hear him talk about other girls. He expects me to just be ok and he his friend thru it all. Instantly and if I am not he is so offended. HE BROKE UP WITH ME. He should be the one who let go easier. It should have been more permanent and automatic with him instead of trying to call me and sleep with me for over a year.. what the heck is that about?
nan Posted August 2, 2005 Posted August 2, 2005 There's something keeping him there, always around. It's just hard to know what. And I think that is your main question now. HOnestly, I have no clue. Making himself feel better, afraid to be without you, feeling sorry for you or him. Who knows? It seems like things have gotten more complicating lately and you are just angry. Maybe you need a cooling off time before talking to him so that you don't say things that you don't mean or treat him in ways that you didn't want to. I don't know. Nan
Author smile Posted August 3, 2005 Author Posted August 3, 2005 I feel like I can't talk to him at all right now. I need him out of my life for me to get on with everything. And I am kinda lliking being single. There are a few boys hanging around and the attention is giving me back my self esteem. Not that I am that shallow, it's just that after having ymy ex treat me like less than human its nice to have ppl around who want to do nice things for me. And its nice to feel attractive again. Strangelove what do you mean I could have him whenever I want? I dont get that. And like I said right now I am seeing very different things that I want. And maybe this is better. I am starting to feel like its ok. Its all gonna be ok. As long as he stays away. He brings this fear and insecurity. I question so much about why I wasnt good enough. We just can't talk. I don't know if I will ever be able to talk to him again. Who knows. He is just too confused for me to be able to be around. Sucks that he breaks up but I have to be the bad guy who can't be friends.
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