VanessaDR Posted May 20, 2017 Posted May 20, 2017 Hi, everyone! I'm visiting here because I think your advices could be helpful to make up my mind. I just asked my boyfriend for a break, because we had had many argues about his schedule. He works a lot and only can see me on weekends, but I started feeling unnapreciatted as time went by, like I'm not important to him. I always tried to support him and trust him, but it was really hard to be apart. We love each other, but he has doubts if I can keep handling this situation, and so do I. Always thought love can make anything work, but I really need some advices in here. Thanks!
1fish2fish Posted May 20, 2017 Posted May 20, 2017 Love is an action. His actions appear to say he doesn't love you, at least not in the way you need. And no. Love does not conquer all. Sometimes, love isn't enough. "but he has doubts if I can keep handling this situation"... When someone else tells you how you feel, this, to me, is a huge red flag. It means that he has no intention on changing and he's making it 100% your problem. If he does nothing to address your concerns and emotional needs, he does not love you. 1
d0nnivain Posted May 20, 2017 Posted May 20, 2017 Love does not conquer all & breaks are non-existent. There is no time out from a relationship. You are either together or broken up. You say you love your BF but you are whining that he works too much during the week & can only see you on weekends. That makes you feel unappreciated. You can't realistically expect him to quit his job for you. How will he make money? If you genuinely love him as you claim, sit down & talk to him. Brainstorm about how you can possibly spend more time together on weekdays. At some point I presume he eats something. Can you get together for a meal? Can you set aside 20 minutes for a Skype or Facetime chat? Why is it hard to be apart? It is unrealistic to think you can spend 24/7 every waking moment together. Couples need to have interests independent of each other. What are you doing to make things easier for him? 2
basil67 Posted May 20, 2017 Posted May 20, 2017 If you argue frequently with a person, it will kill their love for you. When you're in a relationship, you need to raise an issue and agree on a solution. If the problem is significant to one of you and solution can be found, then the relationship will probably end. 2
preraph Posted May 20, 2017 Posted May 20, 2017 Love is an action. His actions appear to say he doesn't love you, at least not in the way you need. And no. Love does not conquer all. Sometimes, love isn't enough. "but he has doubts if I can keep handling this situation"... When someone else tells you how you feel, this, to me, is a huge red flag. It means that he has no intention on changing and he's making it 100% your problem. If he does nothing to address your concerns and emotional needs, he does not love you. ^ This all the way. Love can't fix anyone. Usually it only enables their bad behavior. Can't reiterate enough how true that first line up there ^ is. Actions is really all that counts. And no sign of him taking responsibility. If there's differences, both people have to compromise. If one doesn't want to, they're the one who will be content in the marriage as long as the other is giving in every time. Don't be that person. Love should have a lot of fun. When it's not fun, it's not worth it. Find someone who's fun and actions show he cares and there's more fun than conflict. 1
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