beltabry Posted August 2, 2005 Posted August 2, 2005 I have been corting someone now for 2 month, she said she had liked me for 3 years but never had the guts to say anything. She moved in with me, we spent every minute of these 2 months together, and I fell in love with her. We joked to friends saying we were engaged, and then she asked me if I would ever marry her, we talked about it and decided to really get engaged. The last two weeks I have had a few things go wrong and some bad news, and ended up taking things out on her, we had a few arguments and I treat her badly, I wasn't thinking at the time because I was upset about other things, and then a couple of days ago she ended our relationship! straight away I realised I had made the biggest mistake in my life, I love her so much, and have apologised to her and asked her to give me another chance. I want to explain things to her, explain what had happened and why I treat her bad, but she won't give me the chance, she talks to me over the phone, but won't meet me. She says it wouldn't work if we give it another go, but I know it would, I made a mistake, regret it so much, and it will never happen again! I wish I could turn back time but obviously I can't, I would do anything just for the chance to put things right though, for one more chance. She is now going away for a week with her ex, she says there just very good friends and she is just going to clear her head, but I'm worried they will get back together. She said she never loved him, I'm the only person she ever loved, so what should I do, because I am heart broken and have ran out of ideas. She says she will meet me when she gets back from this holiday in a weeks time, so I want to take her out somewhere special and apologise to her, try win her back. I'm thinking of taking her to the cinema to see a film, going for a meal then going for a walk along the beach to talk. Is this a good idea or will it make things worse? Any other ideas on what I should do?
sundrop Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Why not ask her what she would like to do during your meeting?
crazy_grl Posted August 4, 2005 Posted August 4, 2005 Well, what I'm going to say is probably not what you want to hear. But please hear me out. After 2 month's time, you shouldn't have been living together, much less getting married. I realize that you've known each other for 3 years, but you haven't known each other the way that people do when they're involved. There's no way you could have had that kind of bond. You're probably a good guy, but you moved the relationship too fast. Even people who've been together for years get into bad situations when they're living together. It can be frustrating and stressful. The fact that your relationship was not ready to move to that stage of intamacy may have contributed to the way you acted toward her. Dinner and a walk on the beach sounds like a good idea if she's willing. I think if you really want her back for good, you need to discuss taking your relationship slower. Focus on getting to know each other as partners, not on whether you're living together or whether you're married. Of course, that might not work for her and she might want to push ahead. Some girls are only worried about whether they're married, not about building the relationship to get there. You need to build it first, and if she doesn't see that, you should let her go, because it will only lead to more pain like you're experiencing now.
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