wrinkledust Posted May 14, 2017 Posted May 14, 2017 Hi guys! Hope you're having a great weekend. I created this account because I need relationship advice. I had been dating a guy for approx. 9 months. Everything was great during the start, we saw each other very often, met each other's family and had a normal and loving relationship. We started long distance 5 months into the relationship because I had to go back to finish up college. This was never an issue because we knew we wanted to be together. We texted, facetimed, called each other during the day which kept the spark alive. He came to visit me, as did I. However, our relationship changed when I went back home for Spring Break... He went partying and he literally, butt dialed me. I heard him talking to a girl and he told her that I didn't live here and that he would text her when I left back for college. I was leaving in two days... I of course asked him who the person was and he lied to me, and didn't want to tell me who she was. This is when I started having trust issues. After this incident, he confessed to me that he felt confused about his feelings for me, he doesn't know how he feels, he doesn't know "how to love", he's "broken", he's scared of "breaking my heart", he even said that I love him more than he loves me... This tore me apart. He had not been in a committed relationship for approx. 3 years and never committed to the women he dated, so I thought he was just scared of commitment. We got into a fight last night and I mentioned the previous incident, and he claimed I was "psychotic" and that I always bring the same story up. He said we needed to take a break, but I've thought I should move on instead. This is a guy I really did love and see a future with and was willing to work it out. Not sure if we should really just take a break, or if I should start moving on even though it hurt quite a lot. I feel heartbroken....
preraph Posted May 15, 2017 Posted May 15, 2017 I'm sorry. He was just going through the motions with you. When a guy tells you something like he's afraid he's going to break your heart and that he doesn't know how to love, believe him. That's a warning and if you stay knowing that's the truth, then it licenses him to wash his hands of any further responsibility for treating you wrong or hurting you. You absolutely need to dump him. I mean maybe he'll grow up one day, but he's nowhere near ready for a committed relationship or love, and he knows it. So sorry. The good news is you can certainly do better. 1
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