GAH! What the heck is wrong with women today?!

August 1, 2005

Ok, so the "LASIK" chick didn't work out. No big deal, I gave it a shot but I wasn't going to kiss her butt. I've been learning to draw boundaries.

There's a girl who works a few doors down. She'd be giving me the "look" for a couple of weeks. Not bad looking, seems pretty smart and put together (on the outside at least). I finally decide I'll talk to her and spark up a conversation. Seems she was VERY interested in me and if I hadn't talked to her that day she was going to talk to me.

So we chat a little bit via email and the phone and decide to go out on Friday. She shows up an hour late for our date. I tried calling her but she doesn't answer her phone. I assume it's her cell number. Anyway, when she shows up she says "Well I spilled soda on my clothes so I swung by the mall and bought some new clothes. I changed in the mall..."

OK. Fine. We go on our date, have a great time, have a lot in common. All the next week things are going great. The following Tuesday we make a date for Saturday. I sent her not one but TWO emails confirming the date. She says "that's fine." We chat the rest of the week but I don't get to talk to her on Friday as she leaves early.

Saturday I roll in from my ride around 4:00 and leave her a voicemail on the number she gives me. I say "Hey, it's me. Just making sure we're still on for tonight. What kind of pizza do you like? Call me so I can order ahead and have it ready when you get here." Our date was for 8pm.

8pm rolls around, she isn't here. So I wait. At 8:30 I go ahead and order a pizza. By 9:20 I am getting angry so I call her again and say "Hey, I am not sure why you never showed for our date but whatever you're doing, I hope you're having fun."

So in I come to work today and around 9:30 she emails me the following message:

"OK I normally wouldn’t say anything after being stood up completely.. but in this case for some reason I feel I should. That is freaking rude Brian. I think we have talked before about at least a phone call would be considerate. I had plans on Sat but you asked if I wanted to hang out and I dropped those plans in a heartbeat for whatever reason. I do not appreciate that at all. SO now I have nothing else to say."

Uhhh, excuse me?! I called her TWICE on Saturday, confirmed with two emails during the week. Anyway, we exchange several emails and she ignores that I sent her the emails until I point it out that she ignored them. She says she never received any voicemails from me (basically calling me a liar in that I never called). So that made me mad so I went online and downloaded a copy of my call records that PROVE I called her twice on Sat.

You know what she says? She's p*ssed at me for leaving that on her desk at work. That is was "unprofessional" to do that so she doesn't want to see my anymore.

Uhhh -- ok, whatever. Not that I care, but her behavior leads me to believe she was just trying to break this off and blew off the date and tried to make it seem like it was my fault.

Are girls normally this retarded?

Can I expect more abnormal behavior like this?

I did everything right and this still blew up in my face. I mean, I can't win for losing lately. If you have money, please - bet against me LOL! Whatever game women are playing these days I'd rather stay single than deal with this childish B.S.

August 1, 2005

Originally posted by ConfusedInOC
Are girls normally this retarded?
Can I expect more abnormal behavior like this?

I feel bad about it, but reading this made me laugh. It's just so absurd. I've done some pretty retarded-a$$ things, but I don't think I've ever done anything that bad. What kind of a dolt stands somebody up then blames it on them and throws a little tantrum when the OP proves she was the one who was at fault?

Sadly, there are some really ridiculous people out there. My roommate actually went out with a girl who told him she didn't have a boyfriend, then she came over, brought him a DVD box set that he wanted, made the first move to kiss him, then told him she shouldn't be kissing him because she had a boyfriend. WTF is that about? At least he got some DVDs out of it.

So, yeah. You're just gonna have to wade through the bad ones, and they're large in numbers, both guys and girls.

August 1, 2005

Originally posted by crazy_grl
I feel bad about it, but reading this made me laugh. It's just so absurd. I've done some pretty retarded-a$$ things, but I don't think I've ever done anything that bad. What kind of a dolt stands somebody up then blames it on them and throws a little tantrum when the OP proves she was the one who was at fault?

Hehe. That's basically what she did. She was BUSTED and didn't like being called out for it. I am NOT one who takes being called a liar lightly.

Sadly, there are some really ridiculous people out there. My roommate actually went out with a girl who told him she didn't have a boyfriend, then she came over, brought him a DVD box set that he wanted, kissed him, then told him she shouldn't be kissing him because she had a boyfriend. WTF is that about? At least he got some DVDs out of it.

So, yeah. You're just gonna have to wade through the bad ones, and they're large in numbers, both guys and girls.

Definitely have to wade through a lot of coal to find a diamond, eh?

August 1, 2005

Hm. Are you SURE that's her phone number?

Good luck. She sounds like a piece of work.

August 1, 2005

So the lesson learned for the good ones out there is this:

Teach your children (if and when you have them) to have some basic human respect for people and not treat life like it's some sort of punking show.

------------------------------------

Ashton Kutcher is not God.

MTV is not heaven.

Michael Jackson is not white. (off white maybe)

Being a jackass is a bad thing.

August 1, 2005

Originally posted by Artifact
Hm. Are you SURE that's her phone number?

Good luck. She sounds like a piece of work.

Stick a fork in her. AFAIAK, she's DONE.

Yep, I recognized her voice. It's her HOME number.

Why give someone your HOME number if you never answer it? Uhh, what do you do if they need to contact YOU on your way to the date?

I mean this is just ridiculous, childish, bullhockey....I might still be relatively young but that doesn't mean I want to play games like this....

I understand not calling right away or moving too fast but this just sucks....

August 1, 2005

Originally posted by ConfusedInOC
She shows up an hour late for our date.

How rude. You shouldn't have still been waiting.

I feel a little bit uneasy about this girl's behaviour. It sounds really quite contrived in its rudeness. Does she know you post on this site, and does she read it?

August 1, 2005

Originally posted by lindya
How rude. You shouldn't have still been waiting.

I feel a little bit uneasy about this girl's behaviour. It sounds really quite contrived in its rudeness. Does she know you post on this site, and does she read it?

No and no. But to be honest, I couldn't care less. She has some "co-dependency" issues. I felt bad for her because her previous BF is a stalker (popping her tires, calling her at work, etc. A real piece of work.)

The LASIK girl and I had a great date. At the end of our date, we make plans for a second date. She doesn't call me for a week. Tells me she has a "girlfriend" in from out of town. She says "I'll call you next week." Well she didn't - she sent me a text message she's dating someone now.

Uhhh, WTH #2.

I know I am a good catch and don't deserve this. But never did I think I was going to have to wade through so many weird women.....

Is there like a place where the normal women hang out???? Any help finding them would be greatly appreciated.

August 1, 2005

Originally posted by ConfusedInOC
I might still be relatively young

No you're not! ....j/k

August 1, 2005

Originally posted by ConfusedInOC
Is there like a place where the normal women hang out???? Any help finding them would be greatly appreciated.

I think it's more a case of developing your instincts for picking up subtle indicators of strangeness early on so that you can do a body-swerve around people like that. Easier said than done. Maybe it would help to start a thread asking people for warning signs they should have picked up on (re someone they had a bad dating experience with) when they first met them?

August 1, 2005

Originally posted by lindya
I think it's more a case of developing your instincts for picking up subtle indicators of strangeness early on so that you can do a body-swerve around people like that. Easier said than done. Maybe it would help to start a thread asking people for warning signs they should have picked up on (re someone they had a bad dating experience with) when they first met them?

I think you're right. If I had that "intuition" I could have avoided the last three catastrophes!

I wish I had "retard radar" or that strange women would be required to have the words "AVOID ME LIKE THE PLAGUE" written on their forehead

Well, there's plenty of nice women at Church. I should turn my attention to meeting someone there.

August 1, 2005

Is there like a place where the normal women hang out???? Any help finding them would be greatly appreciated.

Well, if the OC you're in is OC, CA, then good luck to ya, cause the crazies come out in full force.

But hey, I'd go out with you if I could classify myself as 'normal'. Definitely not normal, but what woman could resist a guy with a Kirk icon?

Well, there's plenty of nice women at Church. I should turn my attention to meeting someone there.

Good idea. If you don't find anyone at your church, you could just go church hopping. But don't assume that just because they're at church that they're good people. Treat them the same way you would any other woman.

August 1, 2005

NO, CIOC, that is not how normal women act. Sorry that you met a total loser. As someone mentioned earlier, you just have to wade through the silly ones...

August 1, 2005

Originally posted by crazy_grl
But don't assume that just because they're at church that they're good people.

Or do some of the singles activities they have at your church.. It has been my experience that the % of crazies goes up in the church crowd..

August 1, 2005

Uhhh -- ok, whatever. Not that I care, but her behavior leads me to believe she was just trying to break this off and blew off the date and tried to make it seem like it was my fault.

COIC,
Sorry to hear about your dating woes. I think you hit it on the head with this statement. She had decided that she didn't want to see you and want better out than to blame it on you. It is the guilt trip personified. She knew about the date and time but didn't want to keep the appointment and figured to block you with the e-mail before you could accuse her.
I would say she had changed her mind about dating you and didn't want to tell you so she went with the accusitory tatic. You say the date went well so my conclusion is that she didn't see herself with you. Why women can't be honest is a mystery but don't beat yourself up over it. Just be thankful you found out what a flake she is now before you spent any more time on her.

Unfortunately COIC I think you are still suffering from the nice guy syndrome. You treat women well and they don't see you as a good bed partner. This is the bottom line. They don't want to have sex with you so they move on. I think your idea of finding women at church is a good one. You need someone who isn't all about the passion but wants to find a good mate.

Peace...

August 1, 2005

it's too bad that it took you too long to realize who she really was.

The first indication "coffee spill over my cloth and change cloth in the mall" should give you some hints about her and prevent you from going second *round* but you didn't do that.

oh well, you live and you learn. It's simple. Please try to be careful next time.

i went to church lately to look for *lovers* but i haven't found 1. Keep your eyes open.

OC,CA is a ****kkkkkked up place.

August 2, 2005

The first mistake was ordering the pizza at 9:02 pm. If it were me I would wait until they were at the front of the road and 60 feet from my door before I would call for Pizza.

The second mistake is now you have all those leftovers ! Or did you eat the whole pizza in one night.

The point being. " People can flake. Always assume unless they have confirmed and are near your vicinity that they can flake out and not show up.

Hope you had a pizza coupon, lol.

Seriously I think you need to put the books down, stop trying to figure out women, don't look at any date as a prospective future...

A date is like a Job Interview okay OC ?

You both learn about each other.

Start taking this lightly.

Life is too short to get upset over flakers. Know they exist and be prepared in all aspects in case it happens again.

August 2, 2005

Originally posted by Marshbear
Uhhh -- ok, whatever. Not that I care, but her behavior leads me to believe she was just trying to break this off and blew off the date and tried to make it seem like it was my fault.

COIC,
Sorry to hear about your dating woes. I think you hit it on the head with this statement. She had decided that she didn't want to see you and want better out than to blame it on you. It is the guilt trip personified. She knew about the date and time but didn't want to keep the appointment and figured to block you with the e-mail before you could accuse her.
I would say she had changed her mind about dating you and didn't want to tell you so she went with the accusitory tatic. You say the date went well so my conclusion is that she didn't see herself with you. Why women can't be honest is a mystery but don't beat yourself up over it. Just be thankful you found out what a flake she is now before you spent any more time on her.

Unfortunately COIC I think you are still suffering from the nice guy syndrome. You treat women well and they don't see you as a good bed partner. This is the bottom line. They don't want to have sex with you so they move on. I think your idea of finding women at church is a good one. You need someone who isn't all about the passion but wants to find a good mate.

Peace...

Umm, I did have to beat her off me on the first date so I don't think that was the problem. She was constantly emailing me and craving my attention. To be honest, I think she screwed up the date and had too much pride to admit she was wrong. Then when I cornered her, like the rat she is, she freaked out. I'm not stupid. I know she got both voicemails.

Either way, she's been booted. I will not put up with that kind of behavior.

August 2, 2005

Originally posted by Your reminder
it's too bad that it took you too long to realize who she really was.

The first indication "coffee spill over my cloth and change cloth in the mall" should give you some hints about her and prevent you from going second *round* but you didn't do that.

I try and give someone the benefit of the doubt the first time. The second time, IE what happened on Sat, was the straw that broke the camels back.

Screw me once, shame on you.

Screw me twice, shame on me.

i went to church lately to look for *lovers* but i haven't found 1. Keep your eyes open.

Umm, friends first is fine. Lovers AFTER marriage.

OC,CA is a ****kkkkkked up place.

I agree there.

August 2, 2005

The second mistake is now you have all those leftovers !

Heck, that sounds more like a silver lining to me!

August 2, 2005

She probably has a boyfriend...

August 2, 2005

Originally posted by westernxer
She probably has a boyfriend...

Could be, mang. Could be....

August 2, 2005

Originally posted by crazy_grl
But hey, I'd go out with you if I could classify myself as 'normal'. Definitely not normal, but what woman could resist a guy with a Kirk icon?

LOL! Thanks. The COOL Kirk avatar even

August 2, 2005

Originally posted by Star Gazer
I think that you thought the date went well, and she didn't. You thought you were the shiznit on that date, and she didn't. She just wasn't woman enough to tell you that, and made up a sad, contrived story to back out of it.

Either way, she didn't like you. She stood you up.

I might be apt to believe you -- IF

she wasn't all over me.

she didn't constantly email me.

she didn't say the things she said.

I really do believe she screwed up the date and has too much pride to admit she's wrong. I guess you had to be on the date and see how actively she pursued me to understand why I feel this way.

August 2, 2005

CIOC

I had a similar situation about 2 weeks ago.

Met this girl on a train and we swapped cell numbers. When I got home she had texted me so we set up a date for the following Thursday evening.

We went out and had a great time. When I dropped her off at home she invited me in for coffee and we arranged to go out again the next night. She was really keen and we arranged a time for me to arrive to pick her up.

I arrived slightly early the next evening so parked close to her house and waited. When I checked my cell she had texted me a message along the lines of

"i've decided i'm not ready to see anybody and don't want to go out tonight". The message had arrived about 5 minutes previous to that.

Would have been nice if she'd told me earlier in the day !

As you say, it's difficult to understand what goes through peoples heads sometimes !!

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