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Girl contacted me after 5 weeks after she said "we were in different stages of our li

amazonrambo

By amazonrambo
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amazonrambo Established Member

amazonrambo

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We only went on two dates but there was huge sexual chemistry. Then she phoned me to say she really likes me and I make her happy but we're in different stages of our lives (she's 28 and I was 24 at the time).

 

So I just went with it and left it on a good note.

 

After 5 weeks she contacts me on the dating website we met saying "hey, how's it going?".

 

What does this mean and what should I do? It's been close to a day and I haven't replied as my focus is on a few other girls I've contacted on the dating website and have 4 dates planned this week already.

 

Only asking as we did really click, we had a heart to heart over the phone 5 weeks ago and I accepted that she was ready to settle down eventually and she thought I wasn't yet as I couldn't drive, didn't have the career I wanted, etc.

 

Thanks.

Edited by amazonrambo
Titanll Established Member

Titanll

Posted
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Are you driving and do you have the career that you want 5 weeks later?

 

I mean, she could have been test driving another guy and now has rotated back to you. Have you met anyone that you want to see?

 

Who knows? I would reply to her and see where it goes. No harm, really.

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amazonrambo Established Member

amazonrambo

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Are you driving and do you have the career that you want 5 weeks later?

 

I mean, she could have been test driving another guy and now has rotated back to you. Have you met anyone that you want to see?

 

Who knows? I would reply to her and see where it goes. No harm, really.

 

I'm learning how to drive and I'm always applying to better jobs, but it's something that takes time. It could be a legit reason, it could have been an excuse because she was seeing someone else.

 

I've met a couple I'd like to see, I've got 4 dates planned this week with 4 different girls so this one would just add to the number. Guess you're right, no harm really. She's just going to say no if she was just being friendly.

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Titanll Established Member

Titanll

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It's sounds like you're not really that into her. Are you?

 

If you have a few dates lined up, you obviously aren't sitting around waiting for her. Is it that now that she's back, you hope to get on track with her? If so, go for it.

 

She may have realized that she was wrong and now wants to try with you again.

act00 Established Member

act00

Posted
Posted

1) Her other dating prospects dried up, so she's up for giving you another go.

2) She likes you as a person and just wants to touch base and know how you're doing.

 

I'm guessing #1.

 

And maybe she was in a "different place" and now she's thinking, "I passed up a good thing. I'm ready now."

 

I don't know.

 

I think if you write her back, it will be a few friendly texts and life goes on, or she'll fish for a date, of which you can either pursue or decline. It's all on you. You won't know until you try, and extending some texts won't kill you.

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amazonrambo Established Member

amazonrambo

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Posted
It's sounds like you're not really that into her. Are you?

 

If you have a few dates lined up, you obviously aren't sitting around waiting for her. Is it that now that she's back, you hope to get on track with her? If so, go for it.

 

She may have realized that she was wrong and now wants to try with you again.

 

It's not that I'm not into her. At the time, she was someone I instantly clicked with and probably would have been happy spending the rest of my life with her.

 

But this is more about protection for myself, seeing other girls, etc. I tend to get very attached and then confrontational when I get rejected. Talking to multiple girls is helping that.

 

I would like it to work with her, if say she's come back to want to give it a try, but I will be seeing other girls too. It's been just over a day and I haven't replied so I might later. In two minds about it.

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amazonrambo Established Member

amazonrambo

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1) Her other dating prospects dried up, so she's up for giving you another go.

2) She likes you as a person and just wants to touch base and know how you're doing.

 

I'm guessing #1.

 

And maybe she was in a "different place" and now she's thinking, "I passed up a good thing. I'm ready now."

 

I don't know.

 

I think if you write her back, it will be a few friendly texts and life goes on, or she'll fish for a date, of which you can either pursue or decline. It's all on you. You won't know until you try, and extending some texts won't kill you.

 

Yeah if she doesn't bring up a date, I will.. But I do think it'll just be a few friendly messages from her.

 

She did seem genuinely disappointed on our phone call 5 weeks ago, so maybe there was a guy or two who did have a car or their career in check and they turned out to be weirdos with her etc and she realised.

 

Either way, my options are open.

Gr8fuln2020 Established Member

Gr8fuln2020

Posted
Posted

Are you ready to settle down? If not, perhaps you should leave her alone. You a talk about sexual chemistry, but anything else?

 

She claims to be ready to settle. She wants to find a guy who has is act together and can drive. You're 24, why don't you know how to drive? I'm not asking why you are not driving, but why you don't KNOW HOW to drive. Also, do you have any ambitions other than just looking for a job?

 

These are important questions to ask. Many women want a guy who has his act together.

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amazonrambo Established Member

amazonrambo

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Are you ready to settle down? If not, perhaps you should leave her alone. You a talk about sexual chemistry, but anything else?

 

She claims to be ready to settle. She wants to find a guy who has is act together and can drive. You're 24, why don't you know how to drive? I'm not asking why you are not driving, but why you don't KNOW HOW to drive. Also, do you have any ambitions other than just looking for a job?

 

These are important questions to ask. Many women want a guy who has his act together.

 

If I could right now I would, but I'm not in the right job yet. I'd just hope she'd have given the chance to get to know me until I get that sorted.

 

I never really took driving lessons originally as I thought it was pointless as I couldn't afford a car. But I want that to change now.

 

My main aim is to get my career sorted.

mortensorchid Established Member

mortensorchid

Posted
Posted

^ Agree with this above post. I went out on an OLD a few years ago, he seemed to be a good guy based on the first meeting. Then as I did not hear from him within 48 hours after, I figured "We're done" and moved on. A whole YEAR later he contacted me again through the same website. He said in his message he'd met some real whackjobs and it's foolish and he wished I would see him again. I never responded.

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amazonrambo Established Member

amazonrambo

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That does make complete sense and I have replied. She's just going to be another number to my list of who I date, so I won't prioritise her if say we do go on another date.

 

I did feel like the whole "not driving" and "not having my career yet" was a bit of an excuse at the time, especially when she was talking about wanting to settle down in a bigger house, etc. I thought that was too soon to mention that, why not just let things develop naturally etc.

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