Is this me being crazy or was I right to feel off?

[Mkn1010]

So chatting to a guy and he sends a few selfies my way from time to time. One morning when he did so I complimented him in my reply message as well as responding to the other things he texted about, AND also sent a photo of myself in return. He replied with thanking me for the compliments and also addressing all of the info in my text EXCEPT not mentioning my photo AT ALL.

 

Later, he asked me to make him a playlist on Spotify and because I love music, I agreed. Then I provided the link to it and he said he'll have a listen. Then he never wrote anything back to me about the playlist and it was literally never mentioned again in any other of our future chats.

 

I then went back into my vulnerable little shell as I didn't feel validated. When he texted me a few days later saying it felt like I was pushing him away, I clearly explained that the above two scenarios sent me back into my shell for that time and that it kind of felt like "game playing" from him or an "unwillingness to be giving in return".

 

Was I being crazy for saying that? Please help

[preraph]

No. He's sort of testing you but not reciprocating. I'm not saying testing in a horrible way or anything, but if you compliment his photo and he says nothing about yours, that isn't good no matter how you interpret it. It could be he just only cares about himself getting compliments. It could mean he doesn't think you're that not. It could mean he's mad it wasn't a nude photo. It could mean he was too busy masturbating to write back or think with his head. It could mean he just assumes you know you look good. One thing for sure, it's not a big sin, but it's not great communication. And now because you didn't continue fawning over him in the absence of any encouragement, he's rearing up about it.

 

And I can only assume he hates your playlist or he'd have said "I like that band" or whatever. So if music is important to him, that could be serious. It matters to me what music people like that's for sure.

 

Just don't go falling for this guy and give him a little more chance, but a guy is usually on their BEST behavior at the very beginning, so this isn't terrible, but also not a great indicator if this is his best shot.

[Mkn1010]

Thank you! Do you think when I explained why I pulled back (quoted above), I sounded nuts?

 

And interestingly our music taste is VERY similar, our playlists are that similar it's uncanny!

 

Re the photo, I'm trying to say this in the least arrogant way, but I'm used to guys being very pleased about my looks! So I was t sure if this was some form of 'negging'?

[MountainGirl111]

Listen to your gut. If something feels off it's probably off.

[ashy555]

He sounds a little brash to be honest.

 

It wasn't bad but would have been nice if he said something, especially if it were the first time he was seeing a photo of you. It just sounds like he didn't really care at all. Then comes out and says you're pushing him away? I just sense a bit of a weirdo haha.

[Mkn1010]

Well, that old gut feeling is pretty spot on, after his text saying that I was pushing him away, I tried to casually explain myself and I never heard from him again.

[Popsicle]

It's always good to say how you feel and you did exactly that so you're good. That's all you can do. Most people would start playing games so kudos to you.

[Mkn1010]

Thank you Popsicle, that made me feel really validated in speaking my truth I wish more people were open and honest in modern day dating!

[Titanll]

Do you know why he said he felt like you were pushing him away?

[Mkn1010]

Do you know why he said he felt like you were pushing him away?

 

 

 

 

Well I told him I was a little sus about the behavior and also about the fact that he said prefers to" Netflix n chill" then go on actual dates. He responded with "I'm annoyed because you keep pushing me away".

[Titanll]

Oh, he's annoyed because you won't hook up with him. Next. Unless that's what you want, I would forget about this guy.