Ihaveseeneverything Posted May 9, 2017 Posted May 9, 2017 Hi Everyone:), So I am a 28 yo guy and getting mixed signals from a girl. Mixed to the point I am WTF? I met her at a lecture. We started talking, asked her number. We texted for 2 weeks finally I had the nerve to ask her out. She said she was busy and after 4 days of no texting she suddenly comes with a date idea. I couldn't so we set up my original date idear. But somehow she doesn't confirm my time for the day(over text). I am already like??? After three days I just call her and she doesn't answer but texts me right away apoligizing and ofcourse at 2 o'clock. We go on the date and all the signs are there that she like likes me:love:. She dresses up, flirts with me we have a lot in common. She talks about her weakpoints and whats she likes. I can go on. But I just know right. (no no she isn't a all time fliter or bpd or whatever just believe me on this) At the end we set up another date (at her place) but without an exact time. Next day I say I had a nice time yesterday when should we meet up. Again see doesn't answer for 4 days. And I just decide to double text. And again sorry that wasn't nice etc... We text for a few days and she will work her schedule around to meet up. After 5 days I call just for a chitchat and she asks if I wanted to meet her that evening, I couldn't. But she will get back to me for another time because she doesn't have her planner with her. I thought alright I asked her twice. She counter offered a date. But ball is in her court. It has been 8 days....... no text nothing:mad:. I am not new to dating or romance. Like everybody I think if she is really interested she will contact and make time. Impyling that the only reason for this behavior is that she is uninterested. I already dismissed multidating. I noticed something else about her. She has dyslexia. And see gets distracted fast. Also she has hyperfocus. And some hints of not getting all social cues. So maybe she is a bit ADD or ASS. I have also read that people with dyslexia can mix up the order in witch things are said or written. Also the nerd type and very busy with school and jobs. So this is all confusing:bunny:. And I am already bothered by it. But I really like her. This happend to me before and my first instinct is just to look elsewhere. But my instinct also that she likes (no way this have could been an act)me and her weird mind can play a part and something doesn't add up. My question is what should I do? Is forgetting about her the only option? Is "being uninterested" the only possible conclusion? Confronting her is to early. This will put pressure on things and seem needy. But I feel like a fool to contact her again.... Every situation and every person is different. I would like to hear if anybody had experience with maybe dating somebody with these kind of traits or maybe a similiar experience. Also some tips to break it to her if we meet up again I am not going to do this for half a year. And any alternatives to the "not interested" "or "just not into you". This is obvious. THx a bunch!
smackie9 Posted May 10, 2017 Posted May 10, 2017 She enjoyed her date but didn't see any potential for anything long term....you can't win them all.
Author Ihaveseeneverything Posted May 10, 2017 Author Posted May 10, 2017 She enjoyed her date but didn't see any potential for anything long term....you can't win them all. Yeah I guess your right. Still don't get why she would ask me out on a date and after that not coming up with a different day and time. Maybe she changed her mind or something.
GunslingerRoland Posted May 10, 2017 Posted May 10, 2017 I'd say leave her be and if she bounces back all interested again, just be honest and say that you thought she wasn't interested because she keeps disappearing on you and giving you mixed signals.
Author Ihaveseeneverything Posted May 10, 2017 Author Posted May 10, 2017 (edited) I'd say leave her be and if she bounces back all interested again, just be honest and say that you thought she wasn't interested because she keeps disappearing on you and giving you mixed signals.Yeah, I think there is an equal chance that she bounces back. Although I am not sure whats up with her that is the frustrating part. I can't even define this as "mildly interested" or something. It is acting interested but having weird appointment habits or something.... So is this bouncing??? in a way I guess.. But I agree for the moment not to initiate contact. But again this is waiting for an answer. But save to say she isn't as frustrated as me. So there is a inbalance in interest or commitment or whatever. That is all I know... and I can't think for her. It could be anything. Maybe doubts but interested to get to know me better. Or just being weird at dating altogether. She doesn't seem the scared lying type who would string me along. But than again some women string along men without knowing it or admitting it to themselves. The whole interested but scared for a relationship or rejection thing. Some time ago this happened to me. Girl kept being interested but dating wasn't going anywhere because of her problems. But that is a story for a different day. After ending that I thought: never again! Also it would be a dissapointment to hear she is not interested but it is better than to leave me hanging. Edited May 10, 2017 by Ihaveseeneverything
Author Ihaveseeneverything Posted May 13, 2017 Author Posted May 13, 2017 Somehow people always have a way of making things not obvious in dating situations. That makes it so hard...... To summaries: We meet. I get her number. We text for two weeks almost everyday. I ask her out. She is busy busy. After that we text with intervals of 3 to 4 days. She counters with a date a week later after I asked her out. I can't. We go on a date 1 week later. Date went well. I text I have a nice time the next day and setting up an next date. No response. I double text 5 days later. She apoligizes and ofcourse she had a nice time to. She will get back to me on that date. And we text for two days. 5 days later. I called have a convo and try setting a date. She wants to hang out that night. I can't. She wil get back to me. I thought alright I will hear from her next day or something. But leave her be. I asked twice in a row so don't want to come on to strong. It has been two weeks. Should I contact her again? I just don't get it. I only know she gets busy and forgetfull. And kind of interested but not really emotionally invested I guess.
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