bg1234 Posted May 6, 2017 Posted May 6, 2017 (edited) Hey everyone, I'm a 22 year old male and I'm currently in the 4th year of a loving relationship with my high school sweetheart. I absolutely adore her, and think I always will. My love has not faded, and I'm thankful that she is still infatuated with me as well. I'm the most comfortable around her, and I can truly be myself whenever she's near. We've talked about getting married, to having kids.. the whole nine, and I can see myself being with her for years to come. First problem, maybe I'm mistaking love for comfort? Being afraid of change? Being so young, with loads of friends going to bars, having one night stands, not having anyone to worry about besides themselves. They seem happier than me, though they always tell me how lucky I am, and I know this. This is never where I would have seen myself 5 years ago. I was popular in school, dated loads of different girls, and always dreamed of being in college, having different sexual partners, and just not having anything dragging me down. You see, we were extremely sexually active in the first 2 years of the relationship. Being young and in love; I never thought my sexual desires for her would deplete, but I can say now that they have reached an all time low. I love her, yet can't seem to find myself thinking of her as "sexy". A lot of our sexual endeavors are a bit awkward even after all this time, and I think that has to do with her relatively low self-esteem, coupled with the fact that my sexual desires for her are going downhill and she can tell. This, paired with the fact that I'm so young with so much out there to discover and experience. I can't help but feel like I'm missing out on an important time in my life. It's really stressful. I guess my issue is that I can't decide for myself what's more worth it. Working to rebuild my sexual relations with my current girlfriend, with the risk of it not working out in the end. Or, be honest with her, and lose who's possibly the greatest person I'll ever have in my life. Please keep in mind that I still have a lot of feelings for her in every other way, just not as much sexually. It's not healthy for either of us. Thanks for reading. Edited May 6, 2017 by bg1234
wtfmate Posted May 6, 2017 Posted May 6, 2017 I guess my issue is that I can't decide for myself what's more worth it. Working to rebuild my sexual relations with my current girlfriend, with the risk of it not working out in the end. Or, be honest with her, and lose who's possibly the greatest person I'll ever have in my life. Please keep in mind that I still have a lot of feelings for her in every other way, just not as much sexually. It's not healthy for either of us. People will always need time space after a relationship ends before they can reconnect and become friends; it's a healthy way to separate yourself from the relationship. The more honest you are with her, the more likely it is for you to be able to become friends later. On the other hand, the more you try to hold on to a relationship that's already run its course, the more likely it is for resentment to build up and for things to end ugly. Which of these do you want?
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