MissLaura Posted May 6, 2017 Posted May 6, 2017 To cut the long story short, me and my ex were exes to start with. We dated in 2015 for 5 months, then things ended, and we got on with our lives. Anyway, he kept trying to get in contact with me during april 2016, and I said no. He tried again in june and I gave in. We started talking again, as tbh, I did miss him at that time. We officially got together in late august. Relationship was great for the first 3 months, then it all went downhill at Christmas.. we broke up because we argued too much. Anyway, we decided to give it another go, and promise to not argue as much.. but his moods were terrible, he'd call me names, swear at me, threaten to break up, threaten to block me, and threatened to end his own life. It brought me down. I done everything I could to help him, but he seemed to think I just didn't trust him ect. It ended for good at the end of Feb this year. We decided to stay mates, we went on day trips, and had great times.. he was getting better.. so I thought. He continued to treat me like crap. Did exactly what he did when we were together. We drifted for a few weeks.. And about a week ago he asked to meet me for a drink, I was a bit hesitant about it, but I agreed. We talked most f the night, and he said he misses my hugs, and just generally misses me.. anyway the next day he got a girlfriend, and started being incredibly rude and nasty towards me. Constantly sending me pictures of them as well. He's my first love, and he knows this. Don't know whether he's just trying to use his relationship to make me jealous, or he generally still has feelings for me. He kept going on about wanting to **** me again (sorry for the way I put it), and wants me in his life. But now, he's saying he doesn't want contact. I'm very confused and hurt. Anyway, I kept trying to talk to him, and that's the mistake I made. From today, I'm not going to contact him for at least a year, or when I'm over him. I just wanna know what people think is going through his head. He said loads of times he wont find someone as kind, caring and loving as me ect. Was he just messing with my head, or does he actually mean that? And he just thinks the grass is greener with this other girl that has her own house. (as I live with my parents and it was difficult when we were together) I just feel bad, and worried that he's using her to make me jealous or something. Someone give me answers.. I'm scared I wont get over him, ever.
Gr8fuln2020 Posted May 6, 2017 Posted May 6, 2017 I hope you realize that the problem here is YOU. You have a very destructive view of what a positive, healthy relationship ought to be as you continue to return to someone who is not healthy. It is absolutely clear that he is an abusive snicker-doodle, but you refuse to accept that AND walk away. You may want to seriously sit down with friends, family or counselor and discover why you are so attached to this guy. He is doing what works. He manipulates you b/c he can and it works.
ExpatInItaly Posted May 6, 2017 Posted May 6, 2017 You're still not over him because you keep getting in your own way. You've never really properly gone No Contact. You must do so now. Yes, he is messing with your head because he's a jerk and that's what jerks do. He also knows it works, because you keep going back to him despite the fact that he mistreats and disrespects you. Why have you not blocked this clown?
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