FailedFirstLove Posted May 5, 2017 Posted May 5, 2017 I don't know who else to talk to so I joined this group. 2 years ago my previous bf suicided. It killed me. A year ago a met my now ex bf. He understood everything and put up with me through it. A week ago his uncle was in critical condition, still in hospital now. (He has some virus/bug that eats away at his organs very fast. They have to keep him open and continue to have surgery and cutting organs out to stop the virus) When this happened the exbf barelg communicated with me. He didn't come back to my house at night. It frustrated me so I told him to just take all his stuff and go. We were having issues earlier, kept fighting. It was because our situation was difficult. He lost his job and no one would give him a chance. He had car payments to be made and we were buying our first investment property. He had to be taken out because he was jobless. So all of that was on me. Plus I hate my job and it was stressful. Then he got a job but my past was coming back. I was spirally into depression and kept breaking up with him. He kept us together. Before his uncle happened. We spoke and he said we will work together and I agreed. I was trying to lessen the stress. Then he lost his job again (the GM thought he stole from another employee and let him go during the probation period). I supported him through this but he was so angry and frustrated. He wouldn't talk to me and I was trying to help. This time he said he can't do it anymore. He had no fight left. I called and asked to talk and he contradicted himself a lot. He said the relationship was unhealthy and he had too much going on. He was about to lose his closest uncle. And then his 13 year old dog was not well. So he may lose both. He said to me before we would end on good terms if there was no cheating etc. so he messages me even tho I said I needed time to heal etc. and I can't leave him at this time with everything going on. He said I need to stop blaming myself for everything. Especially my past cause that kept coming up in the relationship. He has had barely any sleep and I don't think he is even thinking. But he was a person full of life and joy. I don't know how he turned emotionless. He was turning into this just before his uncle that's why we talked about it. Yesterday I decided that I might grab an opportunity to go overseas and work. And I would be taking our dog. He said ok. And didn't really want to talk to me. He said he will meet up with me but his uncle was rushed into another emergency surgery. My hearts torn. I have so much anxiety already and trying to cope. I dont know what is going on in his mind. How can not feel anything. He was good at blocking things out but he always told me I was the only one that could get through to him.
Tressugar Posted May 5, 2017 Posted May 5, 2017 You can always get another boyfriend anywhere, but never an opportunity to go overseas again. Lose the status of the boyfriend and keep him as a friend.
Author FailedFirstLove Posted May 6, 2017 Author Posted May 6, 2017 I have this fear and it's causing so much anxiety! Because my past bf suicided. I'm very scared that this one will. His got so much going on.
Tressugar Posted May 6, 2017 Posted May 6, 2017 You are not responsible for your boyfriend's life only yours. You cannot control another's decision. 1
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