Dodd56 Posted May 3, 2017 Posted May 3, 2017 In my case she called last night after not hearing from her for a month. She left two or three messages, I missed the calls because I was asleep. Woke up to a text from her this morning apologizing for her actions, said she feels really bad for calling me and told me to please disregard. Again, just my case, but she was the dumper in this scenario and we broke up around 3 months ago. I spent about a month and a half trying to win her back and she didn't budge an inch, so for the past month and a half I have went quiet. Haven't heard anything from her until this call. My question, in this case, is there any hope this girl still has feelings for me? And in general, isn't there at least some indication, even while blackout drunk, if a person calls you that means they are thinking you, which can be taken as a good sign?
GorillaTheater Posted May 3, 2017 Posted May 3, 2017 Stop looking for signs and omens and trying to read her thought processes like a Druid tries to read bird entrails; you'll just drive yourself nuts. Yes, it's quite possible that she still has feelings for you, but apparently not enough to try to make it work again. If she ever gets to that point, it will be unmistakable and you won't be trying to guess at her intentions. 2
dumbass2 Posted May 3, 2017 Posted May 3, 2017 I'm sure she still has some feelings for you, but you let her know that you still wanted to try and she didn't. She knows how you feel. Ignore her contact unless she calls or text something substantial at a reasonable hour while not drunk.
Zahara Posted May 3, 2017 Posted May 3, 2017 There's another thread that's very similar to yours by poster Tolliver. It's recent about his ex drunk dialing after a month of no contact. She's telling you to disregard. You tried to get her back and she declined. Nothing much would have changed since then. 1
Titanll Posted May 3, 2017 Posted May 3, 2017 Stop looking for signs and omens and trying to read her thought processes like a Druid tries to read bird entrails; you'll just drive yourself nuts. Yes, it's quite possible that she still has feelings for you, but apparently not enough to try to make it work again. If she ever gets to that point, it will be unmistakable and you won't be trying to guess at her intentions. My brother...you make me so proud!
SevenCity Posted May 3, 2017 Posted May 3, 2017 When a girl says she loves you or misses you it's best to happen when she is sober or you're not having sex at the time. Emotions with women run wild and you can only sort of believe them when they are in a normal state. I say sort of because when they say something it's what they are feeling at that moment. Unlike most guys, most women's emotions are subject to change - often without notice. In this instance the above posters are correct. If she wants you back you'll know it. She likely will not say it, but she will do things so you will know to ask her back to your place and untimely she'll let you know when she wants back (don't think sex means they want back). Keep playing it cool and don't respond unless it's something worthy of a response.
Jimmyjackson Posted May 3, 2017 Posted May 3, 2017 I know how you feel op, I have also been driving myself a bit nuts with this. Read my thread, I get drunk texts often, I never initiate conversation it's always her. I never hear a word sober mind. Like others have said, if she doesn't say anything sober then it's likely she's just drunk and it's how she feels at that moment in time, not all of the time.
Author Dodd56 Posted May 3, 2017 Author Posted May 3, 2017 This is ripping me up, yeah. I was(very slowly) doing much better before I heard anything from her. Feels like all my progress was completely reset, and I didn't even respond to her! It's just hard for me to reconcile her calling me and leaving coherent messages on my voicemail about how she misses me, to apparently regretting it to the point where she was crying the next morning. Ugh. I truly don't understand. I want to believe there was a kernel of some sort of authentic motivation behind her calling me repeatedly, but I guess it still is possible she actually doesn't care at all.
Jimmyjackson Posted May 4, 2017 Posted May 4, 2017 This is ripping me up, yeah. I was(very slowly) doing much better before I heard anything from her. Feels like all my progress was completely reset, and I didn't even respond to her! It's just hard for me to reconcile her calling me and leaving coherent messages on my voicemail about how she misses me, to apparently regretting it to the point where she was crying the next morning. Ugh. I truly don't understand. I want to believe there was a kernel of some sort of authentic motivation behind her calling me repeatedly, but I guess it still is possible she actually doesn't care at all. Text her sober and just say you're moving on and ask her not to contact you unless she is interested in starting again. If she respects you she will leave you alone!
Author Dodd56 Posted May 4, 2017 Author Posted May 4, 2017 Thanks, but I would rather not text her again. Just gonna hope she gets the point. She said she spent the entire day crying after she realized what she did, so hopefully that's a sign she won't play with me like that again.
Chi townD Posted May 5, 2017 Posted May 5, 2017 Nope dude, drunk texts and calls mean absolutely nothing. Ignore them. Even after she drunk dialed you, the very next morning she texts you to apologize for calling. What should that tell you? That had she had been sober, she would have never contacted you. Therefore, she really had no intention of calling you in the first place. It sucks and hearing her voice might have set you back a few steps, but if you think logically of what I told you, it would probably make sense to you. 1
Kitchen Posted May 5, 2017 Posted May 5, 2017 I'm different than everyone else here. If I were you I wouldn't respond, but I'd be ecstatic! She's trashed and texting you. That means she has no other guy and no attention from another guy. Poor her! Lucky you! Now you can take this newfound confidence boost to help find a better woman congrats!
Author Dodd56 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Posted May 8, 2017 (edited) Hard to explain this, but you know, like, the baby talk sort of thing that all(most?) couples have? She just started doing this today, after two months of relatively formal back and forth. So yeah, we've been broken up a couple months now and I've been trying to get a read where her head is at, anybody think this is a sign that she is possibly warming to me? If it helps, for context, today was the first time I have spoken to her in around 2 weeks. And the second time in around a month and a half. Edited May 8, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator threads merged ~6
LonelyJedi Posted May 8, 2017 Posted May 8, 2017 Very strange indeed - I would ask her directly why she is doing this. Is she hoping for reconciliation? Is she leading you on? Is she giving you breadcrumbs? Did you or her end the relationship?
Author Dodd56 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Posted May 8, 2017 (edited) Very strange indeed - I would ask her directly why she is doing this. Is she hoping for reconciliation? Is she leading you on? Is she giving you breadcrumbs? Did you or her end the relationship? Mutualish breakup, that I ended up fighting back on hard enough to be considered the dumpee. Basically I quickly decided I wanted her back while she resisted. I got a bit needy in the weeks to come, she got overwhelmed, and we cut contact in late March for about a month. Most recently she called me drunk a week ago and asked me to come over, only to apologize the next day. Haven't spoke to her since then. Edited May 8, 2017 by Dodd56
Author Dodd56 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Posted May 8, 2017 Gahh, I hate that this was merged with my other thread. Perhaps I'm again grasping at straws but this latest sign seems to be possibly a subconscious thing on her end. Like, surely breadcrumbs don't come as sinister as this.
spiderowl Posted May 8, 2017 Posted May 8, 2017 Drink reduces inhibitions. She would probably not have texted you sober even if she had the impulse to. She would do it whilst drunk though. It means she thought of you and the good times. It does not mean she wants a reconciliation. She is probably feeling lonely. I would not assume anything about it until she comes back and asks if you would be interested in reconciling.
Author Dodd56 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Posted May 8, 2017 Thank you but I have a new thing that I'm curious about now and was wondering about(the threads got merged by a mod)
Author Dodd56 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Posted May 8, 2017 Hard to explain this, but you know, like, the baby talk sort of thing that all(most?) couples have? She just started doing this today, after two months of relatively formal back and forth. So yeah, we've been broken up a couple months now and I've been trying to get a read where her head is at, anybody think this is a sign that she is possibly warming to me? If it helps, for context, today was the first time I have spoken to her in around 2 weeks. And the second time in around a month and a half. Quoting for the new page
Author Dodd56 Posted May 8, 2017 Author Posted May 8, 2017 Victim of a bad thread merge here. Would love another person's opinion.
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