Missy Love Posted May 1, 2017 Posted May 1, 2017 I was standing waiting for the train to go home, and a really handsome man approached me and asked if this was the right place to get on the train. I didn't think anything of it at the time, so just told him yes. Then we got on together and ended up standing next each other, and I could tell he wanted to talk, so I just broke the ice and asked him if he worked in the area, and he started talking right away. He said yes, and then he asked me if I worked here too and if for so long. He explained what he did for work and asked how long I'd been living here, and if I'd always been with my company. Come to find out, we work in similar field. He asked me a couple of questions about my company, and I remember him cracking a joke and then asking me several other questions. It seemed like we hit things off and people around us were smiling. It seemed like he wanted to keep the conversation going because he kept asking me follow up questions, but I kept getting a bit distracted because it was so crowded. Unfortunately, I got pushed away from him as the train got more crowded. I wasn't trying to get away from him, but it was so crowded I got pushed away. I overheard someone ask him if they wanted them to move and so he could call his friend over. And I think I heard him say, that's ok and to not worry about it, I actually don't know her. I thought he may have done this though to not seem like he was following me or weird me out. Then I had to get off, and I told him that it was nice meeting him, and he flashed me a big smile and told me it was nice meeting me too, but that was it. I really thought he was handsome and would've liked to have exchanged contact information. Was he interested? If this happens again, what should I have done differently? I didn't even catch his name...
GemmaUK Posted May 1, 2017 Posted May 1, 2017 If you like him then smile or wave when you see him next.
Titanll Posted May 1, 2017 Posted May 1, 2017 Ahh, love at first sight. Why not just ask the guy out to dinner or drinks or coffee? As far as whether he was hitting on you...my opinion is the you are blowing a friendly conversation out of proportion. You found him attractive so we have this thread. If he were creepy, we would be reading about creepy guys hitting on you on trains... If you don't like uncertainty, ask the guy out next time you see him. That should clear things up quickly.
Erik30 Posted May 1, 2017 Posted May 1, 2017 Yeah he probably was interested. That's basically how I would try to do a cold approach. (Asking something which has a pretty obvious answer, then continue or stop the conversation based on how the girl reacts) I'm not sure you could've done anything different, it just didn't work out this time because of all the other people there.
act00 Posted May 1, 2017 Posted May 1, 2017 It would have been nice to exchange numbers. Hopefully you'll see him again and can do it then. I don't know that you could have done anything different other than be more forceful about keeping your spot.
basil67 Posted May 1, 2017 Posted May 1, 2017 I wouldn't assume interest - but that's because I chat with strangers all the time. 2
d0nnivain Posted May 2, 2017 Posted May 2, 2017 Only time will tell if he's interested or just wanted a chat in that moment & you were there. I'm pretty bold. After speaking to a stranger for a bit (> 5 minutes) I'll usually introduce myself. Hi. I'm D0nnivain. Then they tell me their name. Since he's from the area & your industry you will most likely see him again. Offer your name next time Give him the chance to ask you out but keep an eye on your trades. See if any interesting local conferences or events are coming up. Then ask him if he's going to the conference or event. Hopefully he'll pick up on that & agree to go then maybe grab a drink with you after. You did nothing wrong. 1
CptInsano Posted May 2, 2017 Posted May 2, 2017 I wouldn't assume interest - but that's because I chat with strangers all the time. Yes, talking to strangers on the train is pretty common for me, too. Normally it's just a nice chat to pass the time, maybe boosting the mood a little bit. But usually it doesn't go any further. In that sense, I also don't think the OP did anything wrong. That being said, two of my relationships started that way.
Author Missy Love Posted May 2, 2017 Author Posted May 2, 2017 I wonder if he lost interest in the conversation and that's why he didn't follow me when I moved, and also why he said he didn't know me... Fingers crossed I can bump into him again!
GoneGirl32 Posted May 2, 2017 Posted May 2, 2017 (edited) I wouldn't assume interest - but that's because I chat with strangers all the time. Same with me. Although I am mostly an introvert, interestingly I can be very friendly with strangers ..... on a train, or anywhere really. I like talking to different people, men and women. Also, with all your conversing about work, he never asked you if you were married or had a boyfriend, which is one of the first things a guy might ask me when interested. Somehow he will bring it up, even if not overtly. If he were I interested, I doubt he would have said "no that's okay, I dont even know her" when the other passenger asked if he wanted him to move to continue talking to you. And lastly and most importantly, he would not have let you walk out without getting your number! No you did nothing wrong. You had a pleasant convo with a stranger on a train. If you like him though, why not try to catch the same train again and if you see him, flirt with him a little! Edited May 2, 2017 by GoneGirl32
Author Missy Love Posted May 2, 2017 Author Posted May 2, 2017 Bummer, he probably had a girlfriend. Ugh, it's just not very often that I meet a handsome guy and we seem to click.
preraph Posted May 2, 2017 Posted May 2, 2017 Just look for him now when you're there and go talk to him. It's hard to tell if he was interested (or unmarried, even more so), but he's friendly so why not get to know him.
Lilyana76 Posted May 2, 2017 Posted May 2, 2017 I'm reading this thread thinking... maybe I should start using public transportation more often. 2
d0nnivain Posted May 2, 2017 Posted May 2, 2017 I wonder if he lost interest in the conversation and that's why he didn't follow me when I moved, and also why he said he didn't know me... Fingers crossed I can bump into him again! I promise to cross my fingers as soon as I finish typing. I think he didn't follow you because that might have been too creepy / forward for some. the next time you see him, you ask about his potential GF. That will give him some indication you are interested. 1
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