aSadGirl Posted April 30, 2017 Posted April 30, 2017 (edited) So... a half year ago I went on a fun tinder-date with a guy... He drove me around in his BMW, we went in town eating ice-cream, sandwitch at a coffee place and drove go-cart. He said he thinks im a nice girl he wants to meet again but some misunderstandings about the next arrangements happened so we both got tired and gave up... I then dated another guy for 4 months who ghosted on me (have written a thread about it before here http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/593048-should-he-have-paid-2nd-date-why-isnt-he-asking-me-out-3rd-yet-updated )... A few weeks ago this tinder-guy came back and started writing "Shall we go on a date?" again. Since i could feel things have been going south with the then current guy i dated ( http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/622432-did-i-do-my-best-raising-chanse-him-coming-back-during-our-breakup-call ) i thought it wouldnt hurt to give it a shot. So we went to dinner and had great conversations, again i felt we are so 100% alike with economy in a relationship (he basically wants to be the breadwinner and dont mind if his woman is a home-wife cooking food for the kids and he wants to live a bit luxurious, travel etc).. He is 30 soon and I enjoyed meeting him again. At the end of the date he went for a kiss and i kissed him back but not "making out heavily" just a bit more than lips... and hugged. When we had kissed he said with relief "good so its out of the way checked and done" as if he meant we reached a new level (in a good way it sounded). He said we should see each other more often now and said i can check tickets to Phantom Of The Opera and send info to him so he will "fix them" (i.e. pay) and that we aswell should take a brunch on saturday. This date was on a monday and the opera would be next week... I strolled home happily and went on about my life... but noticed he was so quiet! At saturday evening i saw he had removed tinder (which he told me on the date he would cause he dont engage in social media to sae time) so i said "HAha you weren´t kidding when you said you would remove tinger! But What happened to our brunch today?" He replied 2 days late: "Hi, sorry for late reply. Thank you for date I unfortunately obstacles this weekend due to personal reasons. I would like to meet you again " I also replied 2 days later cause it felt like he needed that space and also a bit to make him wait so yes.. a bit pasive-agressive.. i wasnt exactly happy he didnt even call in after 3 days from the date but just got that text message 1 week after... I replied with information about Opera tickets he asked me to send before.. and asked him what he thinks? NO REPLY. 2 days later I asked if he got my text and if everything is ok or if something has happened to him? NO REPLY. It is now 2 days later.. a sunday.. and he is just quiet.. Im not super into him because i think he talks almost too much about econymy in relationships..he loves to pay and like if a woman can cook and care for children. but I have never met someone who thinks exactly like me in that area AND is good-looking (i dont like gender equality and neither does he think its so important) + he said if he marries then its for life + we have same outlook on our futures and are not ready yet but im afraid he might not be ready at all? cause he got party trips booked this summer but he also wants to visit california where he can stay at a mansion his cousins own and wants to ride helicopter relax etc and said he will go there by himself or with a girl... He has to study master degree for 1 year there (we live many miles from there) and i asked how it would go with a potential relaitonshop and he said if it was us we could live there together or so.. i dont know if i can comitt to that .. now when i think about it he isnt ready to seattle down but he seems to be looking around. I feel like a good candidate.. he seems to like me but ofcouse it could all be an act.. I dont know what to do now.. I know he got my last text cause the phone sent me an "notification" about it.. so why is he ignoring me Idont understand.. i thought he wanted to date me more now damn it.. My question is: should I try to call or text him one last time or leave it b and block his number!!? Please help and tell me whats best to do! Edited April 30, 2017 by aSadGirl Spelled wrong title
ExpatInItaly Posted April 30, 2017 Posted April 30, 2017 For whatever reason, he's not interested anymore. I doubt it was something you did, but if he was on Tinder and recently removed it, my hunch is that he met someone else and is pursuing that instead. Don't call or text. His silence is your answer.
Ieris Posted April 30, 2017 Posted April 30, 2017 You know he is ignoring you.. don't call or text anymore! Block his number.
GemmaUK Posted April 30, 2017 Posted April 30, 2017 He's not responding, you need to stop texting him. He isn't interested. Possibly, all the future talk so very early on has freaked him out.
basil67 Posted April 30, 2017 Posted April 30, 2017 You're being really gullible. A guy who has money doesn't flaunt it like this because they know all too well that people will get attracted to the money and not the person. Travelling for summer parties, mansions, helicopter rides. Yea, pull the other one. You don't even know if the BMW was his. He will buy you theater tickets but disappears when it's time to buy. Marriage is for life? Yeah, everyone says that until they divorce. He's all about supporting his wife to be a homemaker? Seriously, even if it's true, guys just don't say this kind of stuff to someone they barely know. This guy is spinning you a load of BS. A huge stinking load. Meanwhile, you barely know him - and you're not super in to him - but you are considering a potential relationship with him. What's going on with you to have you making such poor decisions? 1
Tressugar Posted April 30, 2017 Posted April 30, 2017 At least he created some fun memories with you. Take it for what it is.
d0nnivain Posted April 30, 2017 Posted April 30, 2017 You need to be more discriminating up front. You have a tendency to think every thing is 100% great after a few dates. Stop doing that. Nothing is ever 100% & a few dates does not a relationship make. Let the man prove himself to you over the course of time & avoid conversations about people's economic roles in a marriage. I can't believe you were talking about him being the breadwinner & you the SAHM on the 2nd date (after a year between dates). The fact that you told us what kind of expensive car he drives may make you seem like a gold-digger to some. Be careful not to give that impression. Let this guy go. He knows how to find you. No need to chase him. 1
Miss Spider Posted April 30, 2017 Posted April 30, 2017 (edited) Leave it be. He doesn't seem that into you and you're not all that in to him either. Don't go down the same road. Lesson taught last time was don't chase men who pull away/aren't interested Edited April 30, 2017 by Cookiesandough
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