lovesickguy Posted July 30, 2005 Posted July 30, 2005 I have been going out with a newish girlfriend for a little over a month now, and I hate to say it, but i have fallen in love with her, and she seems to feel the same way about me. However, I am leaving on an international trip for three weeks without the use of internet or phone. She is becoming very suspicious, and does not seem to trust me at all, because I have recieved multiple calls from women who I am not romantically or even friendly involved with, but seem to want me to "Get" with them. I am very honest about the phone calls, which I never answer, and I always try to be careful when I discuss things like this. However, lately, it seemslike I can never say the right thing. I try to tell her not to worry, that I would never cheat on her , but I end up sounding like I am upset because I have her, and cant go out with girls overseas. this has led to her being angry with me, hanging up and the like, and completely taking away any trust she has with me, even though I know in my heart that I would never do this. Now I am worried that she, thinking that I would do the same, will hook up with her guy friends, who call her alot, usually when I am with her or on the phone with her. How do I win her trust back? I dont know how to explain to her that I am madly in love with her, and would never do that. I believe that if I can win her trust, I can trust her, but ou relationship has gone a little sour because of this. Could I please have some help with this situation? It is eating me up inside
AnHonestGuy Posted July 31, 2005 Posted July 31, 2005 This is unfortunate. The "L" word is a sensitive one and should only be used after long amounts of time are spent. So you feel you two love each other, but trust is certainly not solidified. This love is young. I would go to her (not phone) and tell her how you feel. Make it clear to her that you are serious about the relationship and that you will be back with true feelings for her. However, be advised that if she cannot be convinced that you are true to her (even if you mean it) then she will be on to the next guy before you can come back. This may be a turning point, sink or swim, and it will have very little to do with you.
curiousnycgirl Posted July 31, 2005 Posted July 31, 2005 On the whole I agree with AnHonestGuy - but there is more. Firstly you guys are just beginning to get to know eachother - you guys are in crush, not love. Indeed 1 month is NEW not newish. Having said that - it doesn't sound like you have done anything to make this woman not trust you, so perhaps she has been hurt/burned in the past and now has trust issues. Finally - where on earth are you going that there will be no phones or computers? Most cell services nowadays worked almost everywhere - except the Carribean and Japan where there are monopolies. If you have one of the few services that are not international, such as Verizon, I would suggest that as soon as you get where you are going, you purchase a phone card and call her periodically from abroad. Conversely most countries have internet cafes - and for a nominal fee you can access email. Bottom line is that there is no reason not to be in touch nowadays, regardless of where you are - unless you are doing a 3 week wilderness adventure - then I suggest a satellite phone. Therefore if you really want to show this woman you are thinking of her - despite the fact that you are far away - there are easy ways to do it. IMHO the ball is in your court - however you can do all of the above and more, and she may still have her issues to deal with
Mr.positive Posted August 2, 2005 Posted August 2, 2005 Never talk to girls like that it just seems like you are guilty when you say that stuff even though you arnt
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