Alexa342 Posted April 23, 2017 Posted April 23, 2017 I've been dating a guy for a few months, and feel really strongly about him, could possibly see a long term r/ship with him. We get on great, have a lot in common, and hes basically everything I've wanted in a partner. We had a trivial argument, which then escalated into a huge row a few weeks ago, and I left as I didn't want to continue arguing so thought it would be in both our best interests for me to leave. He hasn't contacted me at all since I left,which I was surprised about as it was over such a silly thing and we'd been getting on really well up prior to that point. I have some of his belongings so bit the bullet and contacted him asking if he wanted them back and asked how he was. He replied that he would collect his belongings soon and that he hoped I was ok. That was a week ago and there has been no contact since. Do you think he's just replying to be polite or would there be a chance of reconciliation? Thanks in advance!
Zahara Posted April 23, 2017 Posted April 23, 2017 (edited) Why would your first attempt at contact entail returning belongings. You didn't mention what the fight was all about but I would think extending an olive branch by either one of you would have been the first step. You've now made it seem that you would prefer to end it and he's likely taking your lead. If you want reconciliation and to work things out, communicate that rather than act passively trying to provoke a response. Both of you are at a standoff. Take the first step and be open about it. You'll likely get a better perspective of what's going on rather than guess. Edited April 23, 2017 by Zahara 1
preraph Posted April 23, 2017 Posted April 23, 2017 Oh, he's probably waiting for you to beg on your knees. Whose fault was the argument?
Titanll Posted April 23, 2017 Posted April 23, 2017 Why would your first attempt at contact entail returning belongings. You didn't mention what the fight was all about but I would think extending an olive branch by either one of you would have been the first step. You've now made it seem that you would prefer to end it and he's likely taking your lead. If you want reconciliation and to work things out, communicate that rather than act passively trying to provoke a response. Both of you are at a standoff. Take the first step and be open about it. You'll likely get a better perspective of what's going on rather than guess. I think it's a bit of a "game" to contact him asking if he wanted his things. He may take you up on your offer! I can't add to this perfect post.
Author Alexa342 Posted April 23, 2017 Author Posted April 23, 2017 The argument was both of us, probably more me than him, but as I said it was a trivial thing that got blown out of proportion.. I assumed after no contact from him for a couple of weeks that he didn't want to continue the relationship. Although in hindsight it would have been better to just outright ask him, rather than use his belongings as a form of reaching out. Would it be too late to tell him how I feel? I'm scared of his response..
Zahara Posted April 23, 2017 Posted April 23, 2017 The argument was both of us, probably more me than him, but as I said it was a trivial thing that got blown out of proportion.. I assumed after no contact from him for a couple of weeks that he didn't want to continue the relationship. Although in hindsight it would have been better to just outright ask him, rather than use his belongings as a form of reaching out. Would it be too late to tell him how I feel? I'm scared of his response.. So, it was more you than him. Then, why didn't you make the first move? Why were you waiting for him? You thought using his belongings would provoke a positive response. Never play passive because it will backfire on you. It's not too late. Reach out and be honest. You can be scared at his response or you can sit around guessing. The former, regardless of the response, allows you to move on, and the latter will certainly keep you in limbo.
Recommended Posts