RWn Posted April 17, 2017 Posted April 17, 2017 I am smitten with a guy in college. I first noticed him when he was quietly reading in a coffee shop a while ago. He is incredibly good looking, and out of my league in that respect. However, if I am reading things right there is a certain amount of chemisty between us. He introduced himself to me a few months ago, at which point I was involved with someone else. Since that relationship has ended, we have been flirting a lot with our eyes. I am always catching him glancing at me with a smile, staring, or once or twice staring so intensely at me, with a shy smile, so much so that I almost had a heart attack. He has turned up more than once at a bar I was at socialising with friends after I mentioned to our mutual friend that we were going there. I'm probably totally reading into it in a ridiculous way but I want my hunch to be right. He also seems quite nervous around me. My friend says she thinks it is clear that he is into me, judging from the contrast in the way he acts around each of us for one thing, but I can't accept that and am terrified of making a fool out of myself. Last week I grabbed a tea in the cafe where he works. He looked at me very intensely for about 2 seconds, and then greeted me very gently. All that came out of my mouth was a garbled squeak. I think I then proceeded to turn bright red. I sat down and read a book while my friend worked, but I didn't read a word. He would glance at me. I was trembling. So much so that on the way home I actually got butt cramps from all the trembling! How pathetic!! I have never felt this way around someone and am normally fairly easy-going with guys I like. This is different. I don't want to corner him and ask him out because I don't even know for sure if he likes me. But I desperately want to get to know him better/be able to initiate a process of getting to know him better, but at the moment the whole body-spasms/incapability of saying anything cogent let alone charming is a bit of an obstacle. Please help. I would really like to get to know him better and see if this chemistry/tension goes anywhere.
Telemachus Posted May 3, 2017 Posted May 3, 2017 It's a crush. We all get them. In this case, it's likely mutual. That happens also, not as often, but it's certainly not rare. You may fall madly in love and spend the next 60 years together in bliss. That's extremely unlikely, so don't invest too much in what is a simple crush, attraction, whatever you want to call it, no matter how intense. If you've never felt this before, you most certainly will again, probably many times in your life. You want to get to know him. Go to the shop where he works, hand him a piece of paper with your phone number on it. Say: "you should call me sometime." He will or he won't. You hand him the paper, and you smile and walk away. It's as simple as that, and it requires no more than a single short sentence, and the ability to write a few numbers and tear paper. 1
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