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Ladies: How does a man reignite your lust for him??


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Posted

Hey everyone, especially girls, help a brother out!

 

So there was this girl that I met at college through some society events a few times and chatted to for a while as friends as she was in a relationship.

I then went away on a 5 month overseas holiday. We kind of kept in touch through keeping an eye on each other’s snapchat stories.

While I was away on my trip she broke up with her boyfriend. Not long before I returned home, she changed her tone in texting me and told me that she finds me really hot, and has being interested in me for a while. Her and her friends were on holiday at the same time and we met up in New York and she invited me to stay the night with her at the Airbnb they had booked. We had a very intimate night, but no sex.

 

When we got back we started going out on dates but because we still live with traditional families and live about 50 minutes from each other there wasn’t really a chance to spend the night at each other’s place.

 

This is where it went wrong. I was probably too nice. I was too available, too willing with compliments and maybe sacrificed some of my personality. And because we didn’t have a chance to spend the night together, our intimacy stagnated. Eventually at date number 9, she stated that maybe we should just be friends.

 

I feel that I lost a lot of her sexual desire for me, even though I know that she is very attracted to me.

 

It’s been 2 weeks of no contact, I really would like to date her and I believe she definitely wanted to for a while before I screwed it up.

 

So girls, how do I get that sexual desire back?? What makes you lust after a man? How to still be nice yet sexually attractive at the same time?? What should I do when I see her next after breaking no contact? I know she’s attracted to me, I just need to light that flame of sexual desire again!

 

Thank you all so much!!

Posted

Over these 9 dates time did you guys kiss/make out??

 

Did you try and have sex with her ?

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Posted

We did kiss a fair amount, but she stated that she felt a little nervous and shy when kissing me.

 

It just wasn't possible to even get into a scenario where sex was possible. When we went out on a date, we would meet somewhere halfway or in the City so it was always at least 20 mins from one of our houses, knowing that our families would still be awake if we got back anyway, making it rather awkward/difficult to pull off haha

 

And it would have felt kinda forced, it needed to be an occasion where it felt natural i guess

Posted

A woman is attracted to a man she respects.

 

Display your leadership and strength, and she will follow.

 

Good luck my friend!

Posted

I'm also wondering, over the 9 dates, did you kiss and make out? Is it impossible to have some alone time at each other's homes, snuggle on the sofa and watch a movie, make out when you can, like back in high school? Can you book a hotel room once in awhile, just to have that alone time? Out here, you can get a clean, descent, cheapy room for $50, which can get pricey over time, but when you go out for drinks and dinner, movie, club, it can cost that much anyway.

 

I don't think being available and complementing her are the issue, unless you were creepy-gushy.

 

The housing situation can be a deal breaker, so maybe you won't be able to really embark on a long-term, sexual relationship until you get your own place or meet someone who has their own place.

  • Author
Posted
A woman is attracted to a man she respects.

 

Display your leadership and strength, and she will follow.

 

Good luck my friend!

 

Thank you!!!

 

But I feel that I will need to be able to display this change the first time that I see her after no contact.

 

How would i do that?? haha I need to show that i've changed, but don't want to look like i've completely moved on, or to come off as being a bit douchy

  • Author
Posted
I'm also wondering, over the 9 dates, did you kiss and make out? Is it impossible to have some alone time at each other's homes, snuggle on the sofa and watch a movie, make out when you can, like back in high school? Can you book a hotel room once in awhile, just to have that alone time? Out here, you can get a clean, descent, cheapy room for $50, which can get pricey over time, but when you go out for drinks and dinner, movie, club, it can cost that much anyway.

 

I don't think being available and complementing her are the issue, unless you were creepy-gushy.

 

The housing situation can be a deal breaker, so maybe you won't be able to really embark on a long-term, sexual relationship until you get your own place or meet someone who has their own place.

 

I appreciate your advice!! Thank you!

 

But as we were trying to keep it low key, introducing each other to the parents/family would have been a little formal. I was waiting until we were official before doing that. Both of us have parents who are kinda overly interested and it would have led to a few too many personal questions haha

 

I definitely thought about that hotel room idea, but i wanted it to feel really natural for us to have sex rather than planning ahead and booking a hotel room, as that is kind of like saying "we must have sex tonight", and i didn't want to put that kind of pressure on her.

 

I was very close to inviting her to go on a weekend away to the beach so we could get a chance without it feeling forced... but i was a little too late with that idea haha

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